Do You Realise When Youre Dreaming

I'm too tired to write, I'd rather dream instead...

Have you ever had a lucid dream? A state or place you awaken to, and you realise you're actually dreaming? I don't think I actually 'know' I'm dreaming, rather I am just pleased to be back in a place where anything I want will come to me.

I'm floating somewhere in a deep green forest, just beneath the canopy. There are tiny sapphires set in mauve up in the sky. The sun hasn't risen yet and I'm coming further out of the daze I was shrouded in. When I become aware of where I am, images of the past nights dreams come back to me carried on a light wind. The scent of your skin; the taste of your lips claw at me- I want back to you, but the trees are so close together. All night, your eyes locking into mine. I'm awash and aching.

I find you by vanishing myself. I dissolve the forest and reform as vapour to you in your room. You're tangled half-hazard across the bed. I move closer, slowly too afraid you'll disappear.

As I look, I'm drawn forward. Everything's so vivid I can hear crickets outside. The breeze has warmth to it. The oceans close. The cool floors polished wood, and the linen drapes let in just enough light. I know that when I touch you, you'll be pulled back to day and I'll be left in the twilight again.

I lean down and brush my hand reverently over your stubbled chin. I smile, you've cut your hair. The urge to nip you a little harder than I should...I descend to lie across you. Even as I try to pull my self control back you stir and reach up to my lips. Dry, soft and ever gentle, you draw me down further into a more moist and thorough kiss. Your grip tightens and I try to shush you to be gentler. Too much excitement and the spell will be broken. Things you've heard before you murmur. The absurdity of it tickles me for the barest of moments, and then the thought is gone, like all the other questions.

There's only the feel of your skin, and pressure of your lips on mine. The slightest scratch of my nails when I draw them over your neck and shoulders, clothes sliding off and sheets being thrown to the floor. You leave my lips and fall to my neck. Your breathing deepens and I'm losing grip of you. Feeling my alarm you tighten your grip on me and bite down. I can feel your muscles cord, and I urge you on. Still I'm there, and you're going further and further south. I want you on your back. This is my dream, and I roll you over. I straddle you naked. I'm slick and you can feel me when you arc up over your abdomen. Your hands firmly on my legs, you rub from calf to thigh, up and down, and down and then up. Slow and firm.

You're grinning that grin, the one that makes me narrow my eyes and want to even the score. I lean in close and murmur your name into your ear. I groan and say it again. Your voice nearly drops an octave in reply. You pull me further up your body so I'm back in range, and then you're at my entrance and sliding in. Your eyes hold mine as you push all the way in, holding me and I slide the long way down your thick shaft. Your thumb finds my clit and you begin to rub it with the roughened pad of your thumb. Your legs tensing under me, you push yourself up. My head lolls to the side and I groan your name, again. Bracing myself with one hand on each strong shoulder I move myself slowly back and forth. I tighten my legs as the pressure builds with your thumb still on me and hand still gripping my thigh tightly. I squeeze down with you inside me, just to watch your eyes roll back. I feel your eyes on me. You know that I like your eyes on me.

It's been so long since I've seen you with my eyes, so long since I've actually felt your lips on my lips. I don't have the courage to draw you back to me. The fear of how it will end once again, leaves me in constant state of hesitation. All I have are my erotic dreams of you upon me, that have my hand trailing down between my own legs, nipples like hardened cherries you're too far away to taste. Lost in a fantasy of moaning your name, while my fingers deftly mimick your movements.

The last time, you walked through the door, and I flew into your arms. I knew I had moments, and I woke with the feeling of your tongue brushing with mine, and your stubbles' gentle bristle over my cheek. I knew I was awakening, and in the back of my mind I knew you would not be there. I awoke upon the very crest of our wave to lonely darkness.

Once when I had still been in your bed, in your arms, I feared as I woke you were just a dream. Now it is all you are...