Changes 30

Be forewarned. There are elements of adult brother/sister affection in this story without actual incest. It involves siblings who find comfort with one another following a tragedy in each other's lives. In time they find the special someone each was meant to be with.

Changes

Why was I sitting in yet another bar waiting for yet another blind date set up by my sister. What made her think she knew more about what I wanted in a woman than I did I'll never know. The only good part so far was that I had been seated on a deck overlooking the gulf with a gorgeous sunset beginning to develop. The air was warm with a gentle breeze, I looked at my watch one last time. It was 5:47 and she was supposed to meet me at 5, my sister Jill told me she was always punctual. I texted my sister and told her I was going to vacate the premises. Her response was to please wait until 6 before I called it a flop.

Like a dummy I acquiesced to my sister's wishes and stayed, watching and listening to the waves rolling in. At 5:57 I took the last swig of beer and stood to leave, as I turned in front of me stood a woman as tall as I am. She looked like she couldn't be more than twenty and dressed like she was on the prowl. Though she wasn't buxom, the top was tight enough it left no question as to the absence of a bra or the size of her breasts.

The mini-skirt was heavy on 'mini' with long bare legs ending in platform wedgies. I think that's what they're called. The skirt was short enough that her butt would have been visible had she been bent over. I found myself thinking, "what the hell was Jill doing setting me up with this teenager? Crap, I'm 31, not 21." With a huge smile and voice that reminded me of honey it was so blatantly sweet she extended her right hand.

"Hi, I'm Dedra. Are you Jills brother? Sorry I'm late, traffic and all that stuff you know."

As I shook her hand and gestured toward a chair across the table from me she plopped her skinny ass in the chair next to mine and scooted it closer. I was mulling her comment over in my mind as she waved at a waiter for service. No I didn't understand traffic and all that stuff, leave earlier if you think traffic will be heavy. Deep inside I knew this was not going to be fun, but for the sake of Jill I was determined to give it the old college try. Miss bubbles in her butt, syrupy sweet lipped young bimbo wannabe, turned to me.

"So. Been here long Jack?"

I was not amused, "I've been here since five. That's when Jill told me to meet you stating you were always punctual. And the name is Jason, not Jack."

As she uncrossed and recrossed her legs I was certain she made sure I would see a flash of red panties.

"Oh well, Jack, Jason, they're pretty much the same. You're a lot older than I thought you would be. I'm still good with hooking up though, even if you're old."

My head was in a tailspin. She's good with hooking up? Isn't that what we used to call a one-night stand or just flat out fucking? And I'm supposedly old? Then again, when I was 19 anyone over 30 was old. This was not going well and since I was supposed to be the adult it was time to end it before it started. What the hell could my sister have been thinking?

"You know Dedra, as pretty as you are I don't think this is a good idea. I'm obviously not what you were expecting and you're far younger than I thought you would be. I think we should call it a night and go our separate ways."

When she pulled back it was with a look of incredulity, as if to ask who I thought I might be to turn down her offer of young pussy. As she was making facial contortions the server set a drink in front of her, she looked up with bewilderment.

I made myself known, "I'll cover her drink. Thank you."

Standing she took ahold of her drink and stared down at me, as tall as I am I wasn't accustomed to that and stood to look her straight in the eye. Her next statement told me I'd made the right decision.

"Well thanks for the drink loser, I wasn't looking forward to fucking some old geezer anyway. Sorry buddy, no sex with me."

I exhaled as I looked at her, "Thank God, that's a relief."

Walking away she put a little extra wiggle in her steps, the breeze caught the light material of her skirt revealing the micro red panties I had seen earlier. Old geezer huh? I felt relieved as I walked to the car, why would I want to put my dick in the petri dish between her legs? Who knows how many other guys I'd be sleeping with, or what little extra goodies she had living in her well used cunt? Then there was the possibility of bringing those nasty diseases home with me. Nope, not for me, boy was I gonna give my sister hell the next time we spoke.

So how did I get to this spot in life where I'm sitting at a bar table waiting for what I hope will be a woman of some maturity and enough intelligence to carry on a conversation? It began when I was seven years old sitting next to Emma Lou Williams in first grade. We became good buddies almost instantly and remained that way all through our school years together. I've always been easy going and for me most things weren't worth getting into a pissing contest over. I had a level of standards I lived within and if people wanted to do otherwise, I would simply excuse myself and do something else.

By high school Emma and I had formed a pseudo bond with one another. We were both too young for a relationship in the eyes of our parents, it wasn't until we were 15 that they were willing to admit we might be in a boyfriend/girlfriend situation. Throughout our lives I generally did what Emma wanted, her requests weren't outlandish or dangerous, I found it easy to let her decide most things within reason. If I flat out didn't want to do whatever, I didn't. We learned through the years what each other liked and disliked which made it easy for us to be together.

That attitude of caring about each other's feelings carried on through high school and beyond. Emma entered our local branch of state U in pursuit of a future being a paralegal. I on the other hand landed an apprenticeship as a sprinkler fitter with a fire suppression company. I was but one of eleven men and women installing sprinkler and other fire suppression systems in a two-county area. I was honestly surprised when I landed the job, the first journeyman I was under was a woman in her early forties.

She wasn't big or burly or butch like, just a mom with three kids and a husband who was a commercial refrigeration serviceman. She had an average build, the nicest personality you can imagine and a zest for life. Telling me if I kept my mouth shut and my ears open, we'd get along just fine. My original plans were to take a gap year after high school and then attend college for something, I had no idea what, but something.

The apprenticeship made me realize something I hadn't considered before. There is a need for college educated people, but there's also a need for people in the trades. As Ellen, the lady teaching me said,

"Robots and artificial intelligence may take over an awful lot of things, but there'll always be plumbers, electricians, carpenters, rock hangers, and the list goes on. People will always need the trades, and to be honest, I make a heck of a lot more than most of those college people do."

I'd worked with enough other trades people in that following year to know she was right. If I kept my nose to the grindstone and learned what I needed to be a journeyman fitter, I'd always have a job. Emma was engrossed in her studies and didn't necessarily see it that way. I saw it as a career, she saw it as meaningless manual labor. I was still living at home and saving as much as possible from each paycheck for the wedding Emma had dreamed of since high school. Though I was living a different life than Emma we still did most of what she wanted socially.

There were boring student activities she wanted me to be with her. I should say they were boring to me, I didn't really care as long as we were together. She never acted like she was ashamed of me or what I did for a living, she never gave me reason to think we wouldn't be together until death. She was my girl and wasn't afraid to let others know. I was four years into my apprenticeship and a year away from taking the test for my journeyman's license when Emma graduated college. Within a month of graduation she landed a job with a law firm in town.

We married that fall on October 7

th

, her birthday. We were a few months away from our twenty fourth birthdays and thought we had it all. I had passed the test for my journeyman's license and was on a crew with two other guys doing installations mainly in restaurant kitchens and smaller sprinkler jobs. Between her workplace acquaintances and mine we were an active young couple, it seemed that our social calendar was always full. And again, it was usually Emma who would decide which functions we'd go to, we tended to do more around her career than meeting with others in my circle of friends.

As life moved along we settled into a routine that was comfortable for both, though I took care of finances and all of the man type stuff at home she still made most of the decisions about our social life. I didn't really mind, my life was built around her and what we did, as long as we were together. She took me as her husband and not simply a "plus one" to all the law office functions we attended. There was never any flirting or reason for me to suspect she had someone else in mind. Her dress didn't change, her attitude or demeanor toward me remained in good stead, and our love life was not only active. It was fulfilling.

The one area we couldn't agree on was starting a family. I was ready by the time we were 26, she wanted to wait a few more years. Since she would be the one doing most of the heavy lifting during the pregnancy and birthing process, so to speak, I felt it only right that I wait until she was ready. Over the next two years she poured herself into her work with greater fervor than I had seen before. I suspected extracurricular activity to begin with, but after doing due diligence through people we'd grown up with and her work-related friends it was clear she wasn't cheating.

When I finally put my foot down and insisted we have a conversation about the elephant in the room she began to cry. Being a male I had no idea what she was crying about, I held her to my chest and let the tears flow. Before we'd spoken a word she had cried herself to sleep in my arms. I was up before she was, typical for our Saturday morning routine. Looking up from the kitchen table a half hour later, at the end of the hall stood my bride in no more than her night shirt and fuzzy slippers.

"Come back to bed Jason, I want to talk but I want to be in your arms when I do."

Although I knew otherwise, or had at least convinced myself I knew otherwise, being a male I immediately suspected the worst. She was going to leave me for another man, maybe one of the yuppy lawyers she worked with. When I walked into the bedroom I noticed her panties and night shirt on the floor next to the bed, she lifted the covers in a come here gesture, completely naked. As I stood looking at her she spoke softly.

"Get naked, I want to feel your warmth and touch while we talk."

Now I was really worried, one last fuck and she'd be gone, I thought to myself. As I slipped into bed she pulled me tight, wrapping her arms around my body, one arm behind my neck, the other resting on my chest, her fingers softly brushing back and forth through the curly hair that grew wild. I was ready for the worst as I steeled my heart for an assault, not knowing it wasn't about to happen as I imagined.

"Jason, my love. My one and only love. I have a confession I need to make."

Before she could go on I interrupted, "Who is it? Is it the new guy they hired from Chicago? Is that who you're leaving me for?"

She grabbed a hand full of chest hair and pulled. "Ouch" I yelled.

"It serves you right. How could you think I was cheating on you? I have not and would not do that to you. Are you ready to pull your head outa your ass long enough to listen now?"

I felt like a complete fool, "Yeah Emma. I'm sorry."

"Jason, I realize now that you thought I might be having an affair, but that isn't the issue. The issue is I don't want to have babies. I don't mean that I want to wait a little longer, I don't want them at all. As much as I know you want to be a father, I have no desire to be a mother."

I have no other way to describe how I felt at that moment but, numb. It was as though I couldn't breathe, my chest felt constricted, I was momentarily at a loss for words.

"But Emma, you promised. We talked about this, we both wanted a family. Don't you remember?"

She responded through sobs and sniffles, "Yes, but I've changed my mind. I don't want my body to go through the trauma and turmoil of carrying a baby inside me and then giving birth. Children at this point in my career will be a detriment, not an advantage. Please try to understand Jason."

I was beyond bruised, I was cut to the quick and laid open bleeding to death. I wanted to be sick, my head hurt, my heart was beating like a drum, I needed to remove myself before I did or said something that wasn't who I was. She grabbed as I pushed away, she was wailing for me to stop.

"No, no, Jason stay in bed with me. I need you to make love to me, I need to know you still love me."

Stepping into my underwear I stared at her, "I do love you Emma, but I don't like you right now. I'm going fishing, I'll see you tomorrow. Give what you said some serious thought, try to see my point of view just once."

It was late enough in spring that walleye were running and the pan fish were beginning to spawn. As much as I loved to fish and as much as I liked cooking fish right from the lake somehow my evening meal didn't sit right. I spent most of the night bent over hurling my guts out. It took me a few times before I came to realize it wasn't because of the fish, it was because I felt like I had been betrayed by Emma. The girl I had known and loved since I was seven. The girl I had determined I would grow old with and die holding hands.

Pulling into the garage the next morning I was surprised to see her car still there. Why did my foolish mind think she would be gone? She'd not given me a reason to think that way, I chalked it up to the hurt inside. Walking into the kitchen it was obvious that Emma hadn't eaten, all I saw was an empty coffee cup on the counter. As I went into the dining area I noticed her sitting on the couch curled up under a blanket with her eyes closed. When I tried walking past I heard her say.

"I'm awake, you don't need to tip toe. How was the fishing? Did you catch anything? I'm sorry I hurt you Jason, it wasn't meant to be that way, but I needed you to know the truth. Will you make love to me now, or have I become toxic in your sight?"

I picked her up, blanket and all, carrying her to the bedroom, she was as bare as the day she was born under the blanket. I quietly disrobed and lay next to her. With tears in her eyes and trembling lips the following words squeaked from her mouth.

"Make love to me, slow and gentle like our wedding night when we did it for the first time. I need to know you love me as much now as you did then."

I didn't utter a word as I climbed above her, reaching between us she grabbed hold of my dick and put it at the opening of her vagina. I was surprised how wet she was. As much as she'd been crying I thought we would need lube of some sort. Sliding inside she reached her arms around my neck and pulled me to her. The next twenty minutes was as she had wanted, slow, loving, and gentle until the end when she hissed,

"Oh god yes, give it to me Jase, I need it hard, please baby, please."

I won't say that was the last time we made love, but close. Over the next two years we fucked a lot trying to reclaim what we had, but seldom did we make love any longer. It was on our anniversary, her 29

th

birthday, that we looked at one another and knew it was over. She saw it her way, I saw it mine, but we both knew what we'd had was slipping away. The divorce was amicable and tidy, we split everything fifty-fifty though most of the money in our savings had been made by and placed there by me. There was no maintenance as they now call it, she went her way, I went mine.

The apartment we had rented for years was closer to her work than mine so we agreed that she would stay and I'd find somewhere else. Which ended up being with my widowed sister Jill and her brood of three, nine, seven and three. It worked out alright I suppose, I saw Emma here or there from time to time, she was generally upbeat and seemed more full of life than I could recall. I had dated once or twice, usually with a blind date my sister foisted on me, but they simply didn't compare to Emma. I shouldn't have been comparing them to her, but, right or wrong, I did.

I basically hit the bottom of the barrel when I was informed she had been dating some guy from work and that it seemed quite formal. I basically sluffed it off until a Friday night at the bowling alley with my sister and kids. To our far left was Emma and her beau, all over one another. No groping or feeling, but lots of kisses, seemed like there was a kiss for everything including a gutter ball she threw. Jill caught me staring and elbowed me.

"Don't let her own your head anymore Jason. She isn't worth it, just let her go. There's a woman out there for you, give it a chance and stop comparing every other girl to her. She trampled on your heart and that wasn't right, but you let her. Whatever Emma wanted to do, or where she wanted to go, you did as she asked, unless it was something you absolutely didn't want to do. It isn't all on her, whether you realized it or not, you contributed."

For as long as I could remember my older sis was right 95% of the time, and she was right about this situation as well. I wasn't willing to admit it, but she was. Being four years older than me I had come to rely on her experience and wisdom even before her husband Jim had died, leaving her with three kids aged from 3 to 9.

Jills kids were doing more screwing around than bowling so we paid the bill and 'got outa Dodge' as they say in the movies. It was another long week of working hard and coming home each evening to sis and her kids. I didn't mind, the kids loved me and accepted Uncle Jason as a part of the family. Jill on the other hand was determined to connect me with some woman and get on with life.

Which brings us to where this story started, me on yet another crappy attempt to date. I'd had a few enjoyable ones over the past year, and I can say I got lucky with two of the nicer ones. In both cases we knew there was no connection beyond a good lay in a time of need. What they now refer to as "friends with benefits", or as one of the cruder guys on my crew calls it, "fuck buddies". Somehow that description never did anything to encourage me going out more.

As I travel home the windows of my car are open, a warm breeze is flowing through, my arm is hanging out the door, and the radio tuned to a classic rock station. Summer Breeze by Seals and Croft comes on so I crank the volume. Beside me is one of those cars with a bass that vibrates for two city blocks, the audiologists have got to love those idiots. Cha ching, another patient. I reached over and turned it louder, the Bose speakers were doing their job. To my right was an older couple, probably 50's, their windows were open as well, when I looked at them they both smiled and gave me a thumbs up.

As the light turned green mister thump, thump, thump screeched the tires on his souped up rice burner. Actually it was more like a squeak than the screech my old muscle car made when I dumped the clutch as soon as the light turned green. With the rice burner well ahead of me I slowed slightly to make sure he made it through the next light and I didn't. The last thing I wanted was to be stuck next to him again. I turned the volume to a reasonable level and began braking for the next light. What happened next changed my life forever.