It was the saddest of occasions, a memorial church service in a semi-rural part of Pennsylvania for Jake McDonald. Jake was only fifty-six. He caught Covid in a serious way and was dead just ten days after being admitted to the hospital.
The preacher of the non-denominal Christian church, an attractive, six-foot tall, thirty-something woman with long brown hair, said that those who loved Jake would one day see him again. "He's dancing with Jesus as I speak," she said, standing before the assembled family and friends, microphone in hand, giving her talk. She seemed sincere, seemed to actually believe that something good awaits us after we shed our mortal coil, that something being reunited with loved ones.
Following a slide show of pics of Jake and his family through the years, she invited anyone who had something to say to come up and say it. Jake's daughter, son and widow declined, but others did, cousins, coworkers, friends. A piano recording of Debussy's Clair de Lune played in the background. The audience sat in darkness, while an overhead light shined on the speakers.
The last to speak was a young lady named Hayley. She was a good friend of Gracie's, Jake's twenty-two-year-old daughter. I knew Gracie through Sam's Club, where we once worked together; she still worked there, while I had moved on, though we kept in touch. Hayley wore a black sweater over a long dress, black with red and white icons of some sort, and glasses that she had to remove a few times to wipe her eyes. "Mr. Jake, I called him and to me, he will always be Mr. Jake forever," she began. Then the tears began to flow. Still, she soldiered on, halting with every phrase, sniffling, her voice shaking. "He was a second dad to me...he taught me things like how to download music on to a CD...he gave me and Gracie money to go to the pool...he told me to come over more often, to not be a stranger...I loved him, but never told him and I so regret I never did...I always thought he'd be around..."
She got more emotional than any of the other speakers, so emotional that she could barely get the words out. She fanned herself with her hand and forced her mouth into a smile, as if she was making fun of herself for sobbing so much. I shed a few tears also, not so much for Jake but for this incredibly courageous girl, doing something I'd have never had the courage to do, not in that state of grief. Hayley impressed me with her courage, her unrestrained need to express herself and share what she felt. I felt compelled to wrap my arms around her, to comfort her. I'd have felt that way even if she hadn't been so damn cute, though I can't deny that it helped.
The service lasted about forty minutes, and then people were free to mingle and partake of the food and soft drinks laid out on a long table. The recorded music segued from Debussy into pieces I didn't recognize, and it was loud enough to where we had to raise our voices to be heard in one-on-one conversation amid the subdued lighting of the reception hall. From across the room, I spotted Hayley talking with Gracie, her kid brother Calvin and Sandy, her mom, now widowed at age forty-four.
There was no way I could let the evening pass without at least introducing myself to Hayley. Gracie did that for me when I walked up to them. "Hayley, this is Kevin Graham. We once worked together. Kevin, this is Hayley Egan."
We both said hi. No longer crying, Hayley gave my six-foot-two-inch frame the once-over and smiled. "Needless to say," I said, "it appears that you were very fond of Jake."
She nodded. "Yes. He really was like a second dad to me. Gone so soon, too soon. Not easy to process."
Gracie placed a comforting hand on Hayley's shoulder. "Not easy for any of us."
Moments later, Gracie, Calvin and Sandy drifted off to talk with other guests, leaving me alone with Hayley. "Excuse me," she said, "but I need to get something to drink. I'll be right back." Not knowing anyone else but Gracie, I stood there with my clear plastic cup of lemonade, watching Hayley get her drink, wondering if she'd return to talk to some guy she'd just been introduced to. Just as she turned from the serving table, another guy walked up to her, an older man. Overweight and with graying hair down to his shoulders, he looked like some aging hippie. Perhaps he was moved as much as me, I thought. Periodically, she looked past him in my direction, as if to see if I hadn't wandered off. I took this as an encouraging sign, and one confirmed a couple minutes later after she excused herself and came back. "That was Harry, one of Jake's cousins," she revealed. "I met him a few times." She took a sip of her ginger ale, then continued. "So, you and Gracie worked together. Did you ever meet Jake?"
"No, I never did," I said, "but from what I've heard, I'm sorry I didn't. Seems like he was quite a guy."
She nodded. "Yes. And if I keep talking about him, I'll start crying again. So let me hear more about you."
I'm seldom comfortable talking about myself because most people that ask do so more out of politeness rather than out of genuine interest. But Hayley, locking her hazel eyes onto mine, appeared sincere. I told her about my job with the county as a paramedic. "Been doing it since I was twenty-six, for three years now. Let's see, I'm in a softball league, I'm a Steelers fan, a conservative Democrat, stuffed peppers in tomato sauce is one of my favorite meals, I've never been married and I'm impressed with the kind of courage you showed up there. You moved me to tears, Hayley, you really did."
She blinked a few times, apparently surprised by my candor. Seeing that she was at a loss for words, I changed the subject and asked how she knew Gracie. They met in middle school, she said, and went to the same high school, class of two-thousand-seventeen. "Finally, I got her to get vaccinated," she said, "the thing her dad had urged her, Calvin and her mom to do when he first entered the hospital, before he went on a ventilator. Neither of them had been vaccinated when Mister Jake first got sick. Sadly, it was then too late for him. Since then, Calvin got his two shots and Sandy, I heard, got her first shot last week. Have you, well, maybe it's none of my business, but--"
"Yes, I'm fully vaccinated," I said. "And I'd bet you are, too."
She nodded. "I might not be here if I wasn't. Or, I'd be wearing a mask at the very least."
As we talked, I took a closer look at her, her prominent cheek bones and her straight brown hair that she parted in the middle and dropped below her shoulders; it was the same way that Gracie wore her hair. They were even built along similar lines, somewhere between voluptuous and non-descript average. But what a face, so cute and complimented by a clear complexion and a voice distinctly feminine, soft and high-pitched, without being grating.
We picked up some of the raw vegetables and pastry, then took a seat at one of the round tables placed around the room. Only a few people were seated; the rest were standing and chatting, drinks in hand. Per Hayley's interest, I delved more into what I did. Then she told me about her job. "Nothing interesting," she said. "I work retail at Best Buy. It will have to do for now." She also took college courses online.
I chuckled when she said I looked in "good shape." My six-pack abs vanished sometime after college after I started working and skipping gym workouts without reducing my calorie intake. "I've got to get rid of this," I said, padding my paunch over my blue, button-down dress shirt. "Softball alone doesn't cut it."
"Well, you're in good shape compared to Harry and some of the other guys around here," she said. "And you look like a beefier version of Jack Quaid."
"Who?"
"He was in a couple Batman movies." She took out her cell and googled to his image. "Cute guy, I think." He did look a little like me--tall, dark wavy hair and similar facial features. He was one of her "heartthrobs," she said.
Just then, Gracie came over to our table. She wore a blue shawl over a brown dress hemmed just above her knees, black stockings and boots. Had she not had a boyfriend when I worked at Sam's Club, I might have pursued her. Where Hayley was cute, exuding an image of sweet innocence, there was a naughty, seductive sensuousness about Gracie in the way she dressed and carried her five-foot-nine, curvy form. She looked great in those black stockings. "Glad you two are getting to know each other," she said, smiling impishly. She looked around and noticed two church staffers folding up the tables. "Looks like things are wrapping up. Well, I'd better say my goodbyes and thank yous."
