A Long Distance Affair

She met me for breakfast on the first floor of the B & B. We were seated with other guests, and I simply introduced her as my friend. But, internally, I experienced the very real but irrational urge to correct my comments and say "This is my lover." It was one of those moments in life when I felt like my chest would burst because I was holding back so much emotion. Of course, reason prevailed. She talked about her list of sites to visit for the day and asked when I would return from the conference. We agreed to meet at the B & B at 5, and she smiled and said, don't make any plans!

It was a long day. It would be incredibly misleading to suggest that I was mildly distracted. I met with my colleagues, and they asked if I would like to join them for dinner that evening. I made what I am sure sounded like a lame excuse, telling them that I was planning on exploring beyond the city limits and was uncertain just when I would be home. But, I did thank them for the offer and was quick to agree to dinner the following evening. That would be the final meal together before the sessions ended early the next morning. As I was leaving the final meeting of the day, out of the corner of my eye, I caught the image of my Principal moving in my direction. I turned the other way and headed for the exit. This was no time to be bogged down with a discussion on educational philosophy!

She was waiting on the steps. She was looking forward to telling me about her day, but suggested that we get on the road as quickly as possible. She had a map in her hand. I ran to my room, used the bathroom and picked up my keys and found her sitting in a chair just inside the door. She smiled and held out her hand. I took it, and we walked the short block to where the car was parked. "Where are we headed?" I asked. She replied that it was a surprise and that I would simply have to follow directions. I started the car, and off we went.

About 45 minutes later, I could smell the salt air. She had done a fine job of navigation and had brought us to a park with a light house at the end of the point. She had obviously done her homework. The evening air was chilly and the sun had just set. The light was on. We got out and walked along the sidewalk, huddled close together against the wind and chill. It felt good to have my arm around her. Tomorrow afternoon she would be headed back to the airport. She had already hinted that maybe I could skip out of the conference and take her there, but I simply could not. I struggled with the idea, but missing even a single meeting would cause me to fall short of my goal, and that was unacceptable. I turned away from those thoughts and concentrated on the moment instead.

When we got to the light, we turned towards one another and kissed. it was dark, and the light stretched far out across the water. A second light house experience that I will remember forever. I felt her shiver and decided that it was time to head back to the car. On the way back we stopped for dinner. As I was paying the bill, she picked out two chocolate lobsters on a stick to take home to her kids. Soon we were back in town, and we were lucky to find an open parking spot near the B & B. We went to her room, and I sat in the chair as she used the bathroom. She came out and stood a few feet in front of me and started to take off her clothes.. dropping her blouse to the floor, she revealed a sexy black bra with lots of lace. Next she kicked off her shoes and then slid her jeans down, uncovering a garter belt and a matching set of black, lacy panties. This was the same woman who looked so innocent the previous night. Tonight was sure to be different. It was not going to be a night of quiet moans and whimpers and gentle love making. Instead, it was going to be a night of fucking, of her on all fours, pushing against me as I thrust inside her, my hands grasping her hips. It was going to be a night of unleashed erotic energy. It was going to be a night when anyone staying on the third floor, maybe the second floor as well, was going to know that we were having hot sex. And it was heavenly.

Reluctantly, I left her bed the next morning, pausing to kiss her forehead and then watching as her lips slowly formed of a smile. "Good morning." I said, adding that I would meet her downstairs for breakfast in 20 minutes. And then I returned to my room to shower and get dressed. The sun was shining, promising to bring warmth to the early spring day. A mixture of emotions flooded my whole being; memories of the previous evening, the embrace by the lighthouse, sharing dinner and conversation, the intense passion in bed, the feeling of her body snuggled next to mine. But today she was leaving. by the end of the day this fantasy would draw to a close. I felt sadness. I also felt the tug of the clock, reality nudging the fantasy aside, one more day full of meetings and talks so immediately essential to my career.

We met in the dining room on the first floor. Imagined or not, I felt eyes upon me as we sat, eating our breakfast. Surely, those sitting around us must have heard us the previous evening. MB asked if I could return to the B & B for lunch, a wonderful idea, particularly because I had an extra large gap in my schedule at that time of the day. She walked with me to within a few blocks of the conference center, and we lightly kissed, and then I turned towards the work of the day, hoping to hear something inspiring, doubting whether anything could distract my mind from thoughts of my lover.

I made may way back quickly, having ducked out of the last morning meeting seconds after its conclusion. Tapping gently at her door, I heard MB invite me inside. She was sitting on the bed, the covers drawn down, wearing the white cotton nightie that I had sent her and a warm, inviting smile. Closing the door behind me, I fumbled with the buttons on my shirt as I tried to quickly undress. We kissed, a long, soft, lingering kiss which grew with intensity as I felt her tongue begin to probe my mouth.. She pulled me to the bed, on top of her and her finger nails scratched my back as she moved her hands down to my ass. I felt her palms cup the cheeks of my ass and I felt the pressure of her groin against mine as she pulled me towards her as she thrust against me. She was dressed in the innocence of cotton, but her body had the energy of a vixen.

There was no time lost as she got on all fours, her nightie up around her waist, her pretty ass inviting, and her intentions ever so clear as she said "I want you inside of me, fuck me, please!" She was wet with desire, and I easily slid inside feeling the cheeks of her ass against my groin - a sensation so intense, so erotic, so beautiful. I reached around and began to play with her clit with my finger as I moved in and out.. she moaned, it came from deep within, and she began fucking against me, pushing, trying to take every last part of me inside, her clit was hard and I could feel it open up as she began to spasm. It was all that I needed to send me over the edge. We lay flat on the bed, still connected, and neither of us spoke, neither wanting to break the spell. Ever so slowly I withdrew from her and snuggled up against her, wanting to make the moment last as long as possible, cupping her breast in my palm, feeling every inch of her body in contact with mine, smelling her perfume. And then I kissed her on the back of her neck.

She told me that she had gone to a deli and bought sandwiches. She asked me to go to my room and get the flannel shirt that I had worn the night before, and when I returned, she put it on. We went down to the porch and sat in the sunlight, eating our sandwiches, not saying a whole lot at this point, dreading the clock which would soon bring this visit to an end. She accompanied me as I walked back to the conference center, once again stopping just a few blocks shy of my destination. We hugged and kissed goodbye, a gentle kiss, one filled with warmth and appreciation, perhaps filled with love? I crossed the street and then turned to watch as she walked away, dressed in jeans and my soft flannel shirt.

That evening, I joined my colleagues for dinner, my thoughts we surely distant, and I could not get the least bit excited about the discussion regarding ideas that we had learned and would be taking back to the classroom, but then the conversation drifted to other topics, and soon I was listening intently to two women who were discussing the current block buster movie "Titanic"

My fascination with the Titanic began in late grade school when I read "A Night to Remember", and the movie certainly grabbed my full interest. I found myself agreeing with the first woman who thought that it was a wonderful love story, but was totally dismayed when the second woman, an English teacher whose major goal in life was to write a novel, quickly dismissed the story line as silly. It was all I could do to contain myself and not blurt out "Are you kidding? That movie has stimulated the imagination of women all over the country, all over the world, in fact. How could you possibly attempt to write a book if you lack that kind of imagination?" But, of course, I kept those thoughts to myself. Instead, I turned my thoughts inward and allowed the voices at the table to fade into the background as I savored the images and emotions that I had experienced over the past 48 hours.

When I returned to my room I found the bra and beautiful pair of panties that my lover had worn the previous evening, along with a note thanking me for a wonderful adventure. I crawled into bed and inhaled her scent as I quietly drifted off to sleep.

The next morning I attended my final session of the conference and then returned to the B & B to check out. I packed my bag and looked around my room. I had not actually spent much time in it, but I felt sorry to leave. The drive home was the first time that I was actually able to process what had taken place during the previous 72 hours. The experience was a whirlwind of switching between the reality of attempting to focus on session leaders ideas and the fantasy of precious time with an imaginative, sensual, passionate lover. I was drained of energy and dreaded the thought of returning to school the next day.

I passed a gas station and noticed a phone booth in the parking lot, so I turned around. This was one last chance to connect with her before arriving home, to tell her how much I appreciated the time and effort that she put into traveling East, to tell her how I longed for her to still be just a few footsteps away, to tell her that I missed her. Within a few seconds of connecting on the phone, I sensed a difference in her voice. And, though she spoke very fondly of the time we spent together, I did not sense the intensity that I was feeling at the moment. I told her that I loved her, and then we said good bye. A cup of tea sounded like a good idea, so I went inside and bought my usual tea and chocolate bar to sustain me during the rest of the trip home.

As weeks passed by, our chats seemed to wane, confirming what I sensed during the phone call. The spark seemed to be fading. And then, she told me that she had asked her husband for a divorce. We had both talked about difficulties in our marriages, wasn't that why we found each other in the chat room in the first place? But I was still surprised to hear the news. This was a game changer. She would now be single, and back in the world of dating, and having a long distance relationship simply would not fulfill her needs. I remember talking to her on the phone and thanking her for an intense, wonderful experience. It was the last time that we talked, and our chats ceased soon after that. I was heartbroken. I can still recall the physical and emotional pain, and the problem was that there was no one to turn to share my grief. I guess that is the thing about affairs. One does not have the opportunity to share either the joy or the sorrow that is associated with them, not even with a trusted friend. All that is left is the memories, which I pause to ponder from time to time, and the experience of knowing a woman who is sexy and passionate, even if just a short while, is one that I value and cherish.

20 plus years later: Yahoo chat rooms have disappeared, and phone booths have pretty much followed suit. I was late to join the game, but I do have a cell phone now! I have recently been thinking about perspective. I know that my English teachers in high school tried to push the idea, but I am not so sure that I was grasping it at the moment. But, time and experience and maturity have helped to kindle an interest in how two or more people can experience an event and recall totally different memories and take completely different meaning from the event. There is a part of me that would love to sit down with my former lover over a cup of tea to chat - not so sure that the romantic spark would reappear, but it certainly would be fascinating to hear her memories of our short time together. I hope that we would agree that, at least for a few months, we had shared an intense, burning love affair, filled with passion and desire.