Author's Note: They say that no good deed goes unpunished. However, some punishments are rewarding in unexpected ways. This romance between Ben and his Jenna is one such story. Oh, by the way, don't get bent out of shape by the Hawaiian pidgin English way of informally speaking. Just kick back and enjoy the telling. Constructive comments and suggestions are always welcomed.
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It was a late Friday night when my cell phone rang and upon answering, I heard, "Ben-nee! Help me! Please, Ben...."
"Jenna? Jenna, is that you? What happened?"
"I...had too much to drink," was the slurred reply, "and don't feel well. Claire...that bitch...won't take me home...'cuz she's with her current hot guy! I tried...but don't have enough credit on my charge card for Uber. You're the only one...I could think of. Help me...please, Ben!"
"Where are you, Jenna?"
"Hades...Hades Nightclub...I think. I'm outside by the front door...'cuz it's too noisy inside...and can't hear or talk on my cellphone. Shit...I am feeling really...sick."
Despite Jenna's apparent predicament, I had to smile to myself at my luck because Hades had been my go-to place to kick back, relax, and toss a few with good friends. However, because of my new job...well...it had been a while. Still...
"Hey, Jenna. Do you see a big guy at the door? Yeah, a bouncer. He'll be the biggest and meanest looking of all of the bouncers. You do? Go up to him and ask if he's Keola...that's right...Kay-o-la. If he says he is, tell him that I want to talk to him...and give him your cellphone. Go on...do it. He won't bite...much..."
After a slight pause, I heard Jenna meekly inquire, "Ahhh...are you Keola? You are? Here..."
When a confused "Hello" was heard, I quickly said, "Keola! Hey, it's me, Ben Ahuna! Long time, brah ('It's been a while, brother.').
"Hey there, stranger! How you stay? (How are you) When I gonna see your face? (When will I next see you?)."
"Soon, Keola, soon. But, first, how's the girl who handed you her phone? Yep, my petite hapa Chinese-haole (half-Chinese/half-white) cutie doing?"
"Brah,' Keola whispered into the phone, "Your little wahine (woman) is 'polluted to da max' (shit-face drunk), and she looks like she's gonna...ah, damn...she just hurled into the hedges next to the entrance...and puking her guts out...sheesh!"
"Hey, Keola, I'd appreciate it if you take special care of her until I get there. I'm on my way and should be there in less than ten minutes."
"Okay, Ben, but you owe me...like two shots of booze...on second thought... given she's got some barf on herself...and smells...whew...and is pretty out of it...better make those four shots of the good shit (whiskey) with pupus (Hawaiian appetizers/finger food). Oh, and Benny-boy, you better have a barf bag and paper towels ready if you don't want to mess up that cherry (fancy) pickup (truck) of yours."
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My name is Ben Ahuna (A-who-na), a single, twenty-nine-year-old Hawaiian-Chinese guy who landed a job as the project manager and lead researcher for an innovative reef recovery initiative under the auspices of the State Department of Land and Natural Resources (DNLR) and funded by a National Oceanic and Atmosphere Administration (NOAA) grant. My project not only monitored the health of Hawaii's reefs but also farmed coral colonies that could be transplanted into damaged or depleted reefs to aid in their recovery.
My job was a unique combination of project direction, staff supervision, data gathering and analysis, report writing, grant development, and hands-on fieldwork. Although I had two full-time staffers who handled the land-based laboratory colony farming, I desperately needed added help when it came to the in-water surveying, harvesting, and transplanting of coral colonies. Project interns were the answer especially when funded by a NOAA fellowship. Jenna Zhao was one of my two fellowship interns.
While Claire, my other intern, viewed herself as entitled; did only enough to get by (and even at that without much interest); and always had a party-hard attitude while in Hawaii, Jenna was the real deal. She made no bones about being grateful for the chance to learn as much as possible about coral conservation; to gain field experience on the project's innovative approaches; and to seek employment opportunities in reef management after her six-month research fellowship ended.
When seen next to Claire who was a pretty, blue-eyed blond with great boobs and long legs, Jenna looked like a kid and a tomboy at that. She was barely five feet tall, had an athletically toned body with modest but nice boobs, well-proportion legs, and one hell of a tight ass.
Instead of being beautiful, Jenna was damn cute with slightly almond-shaped and sparkling light-brown eyes, a small straight nose, a radiant smile, and a creamy skin tone that was a blend of her Asian and Caucasian heritages. However, it was her engaging personality, inquisitive nature, and willingness to do whatever was asked of her that made her a pleasure to work with and as time passed, endearing.
Truth be told in the short time we had known each other I came to look forward to being with Jenna. Having been born and raised in Rhode Island, she loved Hawaii's multiple cultures, the various cuisines (boy, could that girl eat without gaining weight), outdoor activities, and points of unique interest.
Our frank and enjoyable discussions at first centered around what Jenna should do while in the Isles and then what was happening in our project. Our chats, however, soon morphed into teasing banter about our disparate backgrounds and eventually turned risqué when our personal and especially previous love lives came up.
"Ben, you're a good-looking guy... muscular...and...tall...what...six-one...shit, thirteen fricking inches taller than me, you son-of-a-bitch! You must have had tons of girlfriends. Tell me about them," Jenna boldly pried during one of our late afternoon talks. "If you tell me about yours, I'll tell you about mine...promise...cross my heart and hope to die if I don't."
"You know, you nosey little girl, that a gentleman does not kiss and tell. Fortunately for you, I'm no gentleman. Without bragging, I think I've had...if I count only 'vaginal sex' affairs...six...no, make that seven. Hmmm, let's see...two Hawaiian wahines who wanted to make babies to continue the bloodline or so they said...two haole girls who wanted a taste of dark meat...one Japanese girl who played too many mind games...a Korean girl who was too temperamental...and one Filipina who wanted me to marry her so that I could sponsor her family immigrating to the United States."
"Wow, excuse me, Mister Stud-Master!" quipped a surprised yet fascinated Jenna. "And I noted that you qualified your shocking disclosure by limiting it to only 'vaginal' sex. What would be your count if you included digital, oral...and anal for those truly depraved men?" asked Jenna as her eyes glowed with intrigue, playfulness, and something I couldn't put my finger on at the moment.
"Ah, I would have to seriously think about that...and, hmmm, use my toes to help me count how many women I've been physically intimate with," slipped from my lips as I sought to make light of the awkward situation. "However," I smiled slightly as I sought to flip the discussion focus, "It might interest you to know that in all of my sexual encounters with the opposite sex, I've never had a Chinese woman...or even a hapa Chinese-haole sweetie like you...heh, heh, heh..."
"Ewww, you're such a disgusting perv! I'm simply shocked and would have never guessed it. Besides...I ain't much to look at. My boobs are...well... small...at least when compared to Claire's...that cow...hmmph! And..."
"No, they are not...and while I haven't examined them, I believe they're just right... 'perky,' if you will. Plus, as the old saying goes, 'Anything more than a mouthful is a waste,'" I quickly introjected with a pseudo-leer.
"But I've got thick thighs...waist...and arms...and would have too large a booty for my size if I didn't work out constantly..."
"Your body is the way it is because you're physically fit and active. That's something to be proud of; not ashamed of. Besides, I don't care for scrawny, stick-figure girls. A woman has to have some padding, especially on her buns. Do you know that a guy can suffer a serious groin injury by humping some girl's boney booty?"
"Oh gross! You are such a lecherous dirty old man!"
"I beg your pardon. I'll have you know that I am a dirty 'young' man," I quickly reposted, "Hey there, wait a minute, you sly little hussy! Don't try to make me forget about your side of the bargain. Give! Cough it up about your love life. Come on, Jenna Zhao!"
"Well, much to my embarrassment, I am somewhat romantically...and especially sexually...retarded. I mean I didn't lose my virginity until the end of college and have had only one real boyfriend...a very regrettable and hopefully, forgettable one. His name was Ed, and I think I was attracted to him because he was the proverbial 'bad boy.' When I met him, I was so darn squeaky-clean that I wanted to do something daring by walking on the wild side of life. Mistake!
"It took me a year and a half to realize that I was in a toxic relationship... 'abusive' might be another way of putting it...with me being on the receiving end. I finally wised up and managed to escape Ed...and my regrettable fling. My parents quickly encouraged me to accept this internship to get me out of and away from that relationship that was going nowhere but down...and fast."
