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ADULT HUMOR

Wood In The Hole

Wood In The Hole

by dtales
20 min read
4.33 (5300 views)
adultfiction
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The Futanari Sexual Health Clinic. One of the first doctor's office and health centers dedicated entirely to the health and well-being of that rare gender minority. It was the brainchild of one Dr. Robin Maddick, herself a futa who was unsatisfied with the ignorance she faced in her life from unfamiliar medical professionals. Most people dislike the dentist more than the doctor... but not Robin. At least they knew what to do with her teeth. Every doctor she'd had looked at her like a puzzle put together wrong, like a lizard with an inexplicable raccoon's tail. None of them seemed to appreciate the beauty she saw in her fellow futa... and in herself.

It was perhaps this distaste that put Robin well out of character for most in her profession. Robin always preferred being called by her first name and hated the formality of being called 'doctor.' Everyone who wielded that title had treated her with contempt or morbid curiosity. She did not wish to be part of them.

That experience brought her to create the Futanari Sexual Health Clinic, a place where nobody would be surprised at what they had, and they knew just how to treat them. Started from humble beginnings but now taking up a moderately sized building on the periphery of the city... rumors sometimes swirled that the clinic was nothing but a canard for futanari to meet up and fuck each other. As if lovely women with giant penises needed the excuse to visit a special place to do that.

Sure, the Futanari Sexual Health Clinic didn't have certain specialty equipment that a fully equipped hospital might have access to, like a surgical robot or an X-ray machine or an autoclave or a wheelchair-accessible ramp or a listing in the Yellow Pages. But their online ratings were invariably five stars. What other hospital or walk-in clinic could make that claim? AND they had a Surge vending machine! No hospital in the world still had one of those.

Beata had worked at the clinic since she was about nineteen years old, back when it was just her and Robin. Over the years, the facility had grown into a larger building in a better part of town, and the staff had expanded into... three.

As it was, Robin was called out to a convention in Las Vegas. This was the first time Robin had taken any significant time away from the clinic in years. She rarely took a single day off. Even on Christmas, she considered herself on-call, posting a sign with her phone number on it, for any futanari having an emergency.

Robin's absence this was the chance for Beata to finally step into a leadership role.

Today, she left behind her white miniskirt, light-colored stockings and nurse's hat, and put on the white coat with the sexy lace camisole under it, miniskirt and dark-colored stockings. Her long red hair was put up into a sloppy beehive, reminiscent of the bun that Robin kept her hair in until she could dramatically remove her hairband or lacquered chopstick. It was a move that never failed to turn Beata's gears.

Beata even found a pair of glasses in Robin's desk and put them on. They didn't appear to be her normal pair, with the thick black plastic rims. These were thin lightweight metal, the lenses for a fairly mild prescription or possibly astigmatism. Maybe a client had left them here. Beata certainly didn't think Robin would go anywhere without these if they were important.

Beata eyed herself up in the full-length mirror. She was no longer Nurse Beata. Today, she was Doctor Wyrhta. But nobody could ever pronounce her surname anyway, so she'd follow Robin's example and go by Doctor Beata.

Jackie, today's lead nurse and dressed in the way Beata normally did, was by her side. She was beaming with pride at the promotion, even if it was temporary.

"You look great." Jackie said, kissing her on the cheek.

"I was going to wear Robin's coat, but I don't fill it out quite as well as she does." She turned in place to look at her profile. "I felt like a kid wearing mommy's coat."

"Anything would look good on you. You're so skinny."

"You should have seen me when Robin and I met. I was a poor college sophomore with self-esteem issues at 105 pounds."

"And look how far you've come..." Jackie smiled. "Now you're 110 pounds AND the doctor."

"And I didn't even have to finish school."

They both looked into the reflection for another moment.

"You ready to start the day?" Jackie asked.

"Only one thing left to do."

Beata did what she would have done anyway if Robin was there. She started a pot of coffee. She heard the coffee maker ding at the same time as a familiar sound:

The sound of a carbonated beverage can opening.

Beata turned to Jackie... who was drinking a can of Surge.

"You drink those?" Beata asked diplomatically.

She took a small sip. "Only when I'm in here this early."

"It's only nine o'clock."

"I just don't like any hot drinks. Coffee, tea... soup. Not unless I have a cold."

Beata's new responsibility as a theoretically licensed medial professional was already gnawing at her. Soda was already a dubiously healthy choice for a morning beverage, but... she should definitely not encourage her to drink from that old machine. She was amazed it was even keeping the cans cold.

Jackie was evidently unbothered by this notion. She tipped her head back as she chugged the entire contents of the can. With each loud gulp, her skirt started to rise as if the can was directly filling something beneath her legs. Her cock was barely being held back by her skirt, the very edge of the hem barely hanging onto the tip. She turned the can upside down and dribbled the last few drops on her tongue... and her cock finally freed itself from her skirt, slapping against her abs.

Beata clenched her jaw a bit and released it. Beata discreetly adjusted herself inside her skirt. How did Robin have the discipline to not be constantly hard all day? Maybe it was one of those secrets she still held after all these years working together.

"You ready?" Jackie smiled.

"Let's do this."

Jackie unlocked the doors just as the big analog clock in the lobby rolled over to nine o'clock... just in time for the doors to sit entirely untouched for a long interval.

--

The first few operating hours of the Futanari Sexual Health Clinic absolutely crawled by. There were no visitors, no new patients or returning clients. Not a single person came in. Even the postman just dropped the mail in the external mailbox as he normally did. He was the only person Beata saw in the first two hours other than Jackie.

Beata sat there, occasionally browsing the many social media websites that had fed endless looping short-form videos, the way every ballpark starting selling popcorn once it entered the American consciousness. The clinic didn't really have a social media presence, its popularity seeming to spread entirely by word-of-mouth.

She'd love to talk to Jackie... but what would someone think if they entered a doctor's office and the staff was hanging out in the lobby, talking like bored teenagers working the counter at a gas station? She was in the back, surely re-counting stock or busying herself in some other way. A little while ago, Jackie had sent Beata a naughty selfie with both her tongue and her hard cock sticking out. That was the most excitement she'd had for a bit.

Beata didn't tell Jackie that she'd saved every single dirty selfie she'd ever sent her. Her phone had a folder with an inconspicuous name and gallery image that also contained hundreds of naughty selfies of Jackie in her nurse's uniform... or out of it, as the case may be. Adding to it never failed to make Beata's heart swell... and help pass the time with a little more sunshine.

The electronic bell over the door rang. Beata nearly threw her phone down and looked up to the door. A patient had finally come on. She was a woman of average height and build, with blonde hair accented with auburn streaks. She had nice plump lips curled down into a faint frown. She had a white tank top with no bra underneath, a long patterned skirt and white-on-black Vans.

"Welcome to the Futanari Sexual Health Clinic." Beata said proudly tipping her glasses back up her nose. "What can we do for you?"

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The woman approached the desk slowly. Beata could hear every step on the carpeted floor. She'd forgotten to put on the radio this morning! That's why it was so uncomfortably quiet in there. She'd have to ask Jackie to put it on.

"Are you... the doctor?" She asked.

"Yes, I am. Are you new to the clinic?"

"I suppose I am..."

"What's your name?"

"Courtney."

Beata typed it on her keyboard. If only this monitor was hooked up to something...

"...you don't need my last name?"

"There's not that many Courtneys around these days. So what have you come in here for?"

Courtney looked embarrassed. "I'm... not satisfied with the size of my penis."

Beata's eyes lit up. That old gambit, the one that brought her to Robin's door in the first place and started this journey. This woman didn't need enhancement, she just needed support. Someone to help her self-esteem and maybe also to wring her cock out and gargle her hot jizz... it was almost ten o'clock and she hadn't had a single orgasm...

"Oh, that's too bad." She stood from her desk. "Maybe you could have guessed, but I am also a futa. And in college, I had some partners who weren't satisfied with me. It was devastating, but I persevered. Doesn't seem like such a big deal now..."

Beata walked around the desk. "Why don't you show me what you've got, and we can see where we go from there?" She tried not to sound too eager, as if she didn't know just where this would hopefully go.

"Out here?"

"We're short-staffed today, I'm afraid." Beata explained. "That's why I'm at the desk right now. We can go behind the desk if you're really shy, but there's nobody around. The mailman just went by. We're not expecting anyone else, and if another patient shows up... well, they should already know what we've got, right?"

Courtney didn't look convinced. This was all so much more convincing in a British accent. Maybe Beata should have faked it... but nobody would believe the pale redhead was British rather than Irish. Too late to change now.

She sighed. "OK, sure."

Beata got to her knees, to better inspect the specimen. These dark stockings wouldn't show wear as easily as her white ones... maybe she should switch so she could spend more time on her knees.

Courtney unzipped her skirt and dropped it to the floor.

Beata leaned back.

She had to. She was too close to see it all. Courtney's flaccid member was probably about as big as Beata's was hard, nearly reaching her knee. Each of her balls were as large as a medium avocado. In the years she'd been doing this... this was probably the largest penis she'd ever seen.

Beata tried to find her voice. "Uhh..." She looked up to Courtney, who didn't look as happy as she reasonably should be. "You want this to be... bigger?"

Courtney's expression deepened. "Did I say I wanted it to be bigger?" She said testily. "I said I wasn't satisfied with it."

Beata pulled her mini measuring tape out of her coat pocket. "I'm curious..." She ran the tape down the length of her cock. "Wow, about what I thought. Eleven inches flaccid..."

"If only it stayed there..." Courtney rued.

"I'd love to see it at its full size..." Beata said. "In the strictest sense of medical curiosity, of course."

Courtney bristled at the term 'medical curiosity,' picturing something very not erotic in a jar with formaldehyde. "Here?"

"Again, nobody's around. Besides, if people are going to see it, it might as well be at its most impressive."

"Alright, fine..." Courtney folded her arms.

Beata put her hand around it. It was soft, yet so hot, about as big in her hand as a can of soda. She leaned in and kissed the shaft. Courtney shook a bit at the unexpected contact.

"It's very sensitive, considering the size... I'm surprised." Beata said, rolling one ball in each hand as Courtney stiffened. The heat coming off it increased as it grew fully erect, trembling with every heart beat. Beata had to lean back from it.

It wasn't often that Beata had been left speechless. She fumbled through her pocket for her walkie-talkie, which definitely wasn't a toy she found at Five Below and covered the green camo plastic with black paint. "Nurse Jackie? Could you come out here, please?"

"Nurse Jackie?" Courtney asked.

"Not that one."

Nurse Jackie appeared promptly, but not promptly enough for Courtney, as she stood in her vulnerable position. "Yes, Doctor?" She asked.

Beata just pointed.

Jackie turned towards it, and nearly jumped back. "Oh, my goodness."

"That was my reaction, too." Beata said. "In your professional opinion... is this too big?"

"I've said there's no such thing as too big, but surely there must be a point where it is impractical." Jackie reasoned. "What the official number?"

Beata pulled out her measuring tape again, the tool she kept to hand more closely than a thermometer or a reflex hammer. She ran it across the whole thing from base to tip.

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"Holy cow, it's sixteen inches." Beata remarked. "I try to maintain my professional attitude when working, but this is breathtaking."

"Yeah, this is a real weapon right here..." Jackie brought her arm up against it. It nearly reached the length of her forearm, even with fingers fully extended. "What are they feeding everyone nowadays?"

"Nowadays?" Courtney asked. "I think I'm older than you..."

"So what's the diagnosis, doc?" Jackie asked.

"Well, I'd say the swelling is quite strong." Beata said. "We need to reduce it... somehow."

"I have a feeling you're not going to recommend Advil..." Courtney gulped.

"We have... other ideas."

"Can we... do this somewhere else?" Courtney really wanted to move this a little further from the doorway.

"It's just the two of us here today." Jackie said. "One of us has to watch the desk... but this problem would seem to require more than two hands."

Jackie put one hand across Courtney's cock, and Beata put one next to it. They continued on in this fashion, like amateur baseball players using a bat to determine which team went first... until they ran out of hands. There was still plenty left uncovered.

"Well, we will have to do what we can with what we have."

With a wide stroke of her right arm, Beata started to stroke the huge thing out towards her, almost over her shoulder. "This will be quite a workout..." Beata gasped, perhaps dramatically. "Better exercise than a Shake Weight."

Unable to offer assistance on that, Jackie got lower and started licking Courtney's balls. She lifted it in her palm, the orb barely fitting in her hand. "My goodness, what a set these are..." She rocked each on in each hand before returning one to her tongue. "So heavy, but soft and smooth..."

Courtney was a little embarrassed... but wasn't about to discourage this attention. She closed her eyes and pretended she was somewhere else. After all, the doctor said nobody would interrupt them.

The electric bell over the nearby door rang. Everyone turned towards it, Couurtney nearly knocking Beata's head off as she swung her mighty todger. A delivery woman in a brown uniform and cap was walking through the doorway backwards, pulling a large rectangular box in with her. She spun around and lifted her head.

"I've got a delivery for a Doctor..." Her voice trailed off as she realized what she had stumbled into.

"I'll take that." Jackie stepped up and signed the delivery woman's electronic device. She took the large box, almost as tall as her, and walked it off the hand truck and towards the front desk. "This is that replacement bed that Robin ordered before she left. I'll try to get this set up later."

The delivery woman stole a few glances from Courtney before making a hasty retreat, the wheels of her hand truck squeaking behind her.

"See?" Courtney said. "When a woman sees it, they just run for the hills."

"I think she just left because she has a truckload of stuff to deliver." Beata reasoned. "If this was her last stop, she would have surely jumped on it right away."

Jackie moved back to up Courtney, getting down on her knees next to Beata. "But lucky for us, the phone hasn't rang all day. So the two of us could continue giving you some of this tender attention you clearly need."

Courtney stammered at the two eager pretty faces rubbing their cheeks against her cock like cats. "Sure, yeah, we can still do this."

"Normally, I'd suck this thing dry, but I don't think I can..." Jackie threw her mouth open as far as she could, the way people trying to stick their first in their mouth. She tried not to touch it with her teeth, but there really was no way for to do this. "Nah, I do at least see why you find this to be excessive."

"But there's lots of positions we can do with a real big one like this..." Beata reached across and pulled open Jackie's coat, under which she wore no bra. Beata put one hand under each breast and brought them up around Courtney's cock. Jackie quickly took control and rolled her tits in small circles.

"I wish Robin was here..." Beata said, pulling her own modest breasts out of her coat and positioning herself above. "She's got an amazing rack... but this still works alright. Possibly the world's first every double paizuri... this couldn't have worked if you were smaller..."

Courtney didn't respond, except to stare down at the pair as they worked her. They shared the burden of this quite well...

Jackie released her breasts and moved her head in, kissing and licking a section in the middle of Courtney's cock. Beata didn't feel like her titfucking was all that effective anyway, so she did the same. The pair kissed and licked on their half of the cock. Jackie tried reaching her lips across it, but couldn't quite touch Beata.

"I can't reach you..." She pouted. "We've done the double fellatio loads of times, but never one this big..."

"It's fine..." Beata said. "Let's just move closer to the tip and maybe we can..."

Both women raked their tongues against Courtney's cock from balls to tip, leaving twin lines of spit on each side. They both extended their tongue across the tip and lashed them against each other, Courntey's tongue getting teased with gentle incidental flicks. Courtney shook at the tickling, which caused her weapon to wag about. Jackie held the base still with one hand... but putting it back on such a huge hot thing caused her to start tugging it towards herself.

She couldn't wait for this thing to go off.

Courtney looked down. The two women making out and kissing her cock... they seemed to enjoy this process very much.... so much so that their skirts were tenting upwards.

"Wait... are you BOTH futa?" Courtney said.

Jackie and Beata looked across the cock at each other. They both wriggled themselves out of their skirts, tapping the tips together like steepled fingers. "Yeah, we are." Jackie said. "Isn't it great?"

Courtney stepped back, away from their mouths. "No, dammit. I don't want this. I don't want FUTA to praise my cock and tell me it's not too big, because futa are all stupid sluts who love everything remotely sexual."

"Excuse me?" Jackie sneered.

"I want a WOMAN, a non-futa woman. Futa all just focus on my thing, but all the women who aren't futa won't even get near it! I want a woman who I can have a relationship with, not just wild anonymous sex. Maybe even, you know, have a kid with someday? Is that too much to ask?"

Beata looked down for a bit. All the times she'd wished for something bigger... she'd not considered the trouble it would cause if it were as big as she hoped. It all seemed to work out in her fantasies, somehow...

What would Robin say here?

Beata got to her feet. "I'm... sorry for not taking your request seriously. We've not encountered anyone who wanted to be... smaller. As such, we don't have a technique for that. If we use the metaphor of height, there are bone grafting surgeries a shorter person could go through to be taller. It's drastic and painful, but it is possible. To get shorter... I don't think that's ever been considered. It's more about finding the underlying cause for the height and if it is continuing, like a tumor of the pituitary gland. There isn't a way to reverse it, but out of control growth could be controlled."

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