Vegerotica

"Oh, god, I'm turnipy today," Pepper sighed. "It's been way too long since we spinached."

"Come here, pumpkin," Sorrel told her. "Are you thinking you'd like some good old-fashioned yamming?"

"God, yes." Pepper settled into his arms. "It's been a week, and I've been dreaming about your zucchini."

"Glad to hear it, because the past few days, all I've been able to think about is your sweet little potato," Sorrel said. He hugged her. "Come on, baby, let's go upstairs so we can cabbage."

"Upstairs? My rutabaga's so wet just thinking about your hard eggplant that I'm afraid I'll drip when I walk!"

"Well, I don't think we have room for everything I want to do to you here."

"Oh? And what do you want to do to me?"

"I want to nibble on your cassavas," Sorrel growled into her ear. "I want to play with your parsnip. And I want to endive you till you broccoli."

"Mmm, sounds delicious," Pepper murmured. "And will I get a taste of your asparagus?"

"You know it, baby."

"Then let's go upstairs before I carrot just thinking about it!"

They untangled themselves and hurried upstairs, Pepper first. "I love watching your firm onion when you walk," Sorrel said. He grabbed her. "You've got the hottest little beet I've ever seen."

"Oh, Sorrel, you're so corny," Pepper said.

"But you love me anyway."

"Yeah, because you're so good with your jalapeno."

As soon as they walked into the bedroom, Sorrel peeled off his shirt and pants. He lay on the bed, his hard cucumber pointing at the ceiling. "Come on, baby, get those clothes off," he said. "Let me see that gorgeous squash of yours."

Pepper took her time removing her clothing. She hoped the anticipation would make Sorrel as soy as she was. After all, it was his fault they hadn't had any ginger in the past week. He worked too damn much. So let him suffer before he got his hands on her gourd.

"Ooh, baby, get down to skin!" Sorrel groaned. He stroked his zucchini as he watched. "You are so yamming hot!"

"Yeah? Is your mouth watering yet?" Pepper undid two of the buttons on her blouse and pulled it aside, giving Sorrel a glimpse of her lentils.

He groaned in frustration. "Damn it, Pepper, get those clothes off, woman! I want to get my hands on your juicy little radish."

"Oh, you will. Be patient." Pepper slowly undid the rest of the buttons, then tossed the blouse onto the floor. She took her time with her bra, just to irritate Sorrel, but finally she unhooked it and dropped it on top of her blouse. She took her round cassavas, with their hard little lentils, and held them in her hands as though offering them to Sorrel. "Are these what you want?"

"Ooh, baby, let me see." Sorrel crawled to the edge of the bed and reached for Pepper's tomatoes. She stepped back. "Stop teasing me, or I'm going to get rough with you," Sorrel threatened.

"Yeah, I'm scared of you and your little celery there," Pepper said.

"Little? I'll show you, woman."

Sorrel jumped off the bed, grabbed Pepper by the shoulders, and flung her onto the mattress. She laughed as he leaped on top of her, stopping himself at the last minute with his hands before he landed fully on her. "Scared now?" he asked.

"Nope."

"Darn. Guess I'll have to get you more turnipy instead. Payback for teasing me."

He lowered his head to one hard little lima bean and sucked it into his mouth. With his hand, he massaged Pepper's other artichoke. Pepper moaned; it had been far too long since she'd felt his touch.

Just when she thought she was going to scream with shallot, Sorrel abruptly stopped. "Hmm," he said, looking down at her. "Should I kohlrabi that cute rutabaga of yours first, or just shove my cuke into it and fennel you silly?"

"Just do something!" Pepper begged.

"Oh, payback's a leek, isn't it?" Sorrel ran his finger around the opening of Pepper's pumpkin. "Like that?"

"Oh, god, forget about endiving me, just yam me!" Pepper cried.

"You sure?"

"Yes! Damn it, Sorrel, yes!"

Sorrel pulled Pepper's legs onto his shoulders and lined his eggplant up with her rutabaga. He stayed like that for a moment, until she moaned in frustration, then suddenly beaned hard into her.

"God, yes, cabbage me! Cabbage me hard" Pepper yelled.

"Garlic, baby, your sweet potato is so tight!" Sorrel groaned.

For a few minutes, all that could be heard was grunting and moaning as the two cabbaged. Then Pepper let out a scream as she cressed harder than she had in months. Sorrel beaned hard one last time, then groaned loudly as he, too, nutted.

He rolled off Pepper onto his back. "Damn, that was one hell of a yam!" he said.

"It sure was." Pepper snuggled against him. "Let's not wait so long next thyme."