"You're gonna love my ma and pa, I just know it."
Billy just loved the way Hattie Mae talked. Especially with her mouth full and her tongue swirling around his swollen manhood as she rhythmically squeezed his balls. It was a truly fine way to talk, with the vibrations of her vocal cords caressing the sensitive folds of his foreskin. Her accent was cute as well.
"You're gonna love the rest of my family too," Hattie Mae mumbled as she plunged Billy's tool even deeper into her talented mouth. "We're a real close family. We do absolutely everything together."
Absently, Billy wondered what comprised "everything" up on Squalor Mountain. Cow chip tossing and possum wrasslin,' he supposed. Maybe a little moonshine running. If they still did that sort of thing.
He really wasn't looking forward to asking Hattie Mae's hillbilly parents for their daughter's hand in marriage. Or for their blessings. Still, as he exploded in Hattie Mae's mouth for the seventh time that morning, he knew he was doing the right thing. This was the girl he had to marry.
* * * * *
They didn't arrive until 11:30 on Thursday morning. Billy noted the huge satellite dish on top of the ramshackle cabin. At least he wouldn't miss the last half hour of the always scintillating Macy Day's parade. Maybe he would even get to see the Detroit Lions take their traditional Thanksgiving Day pummeling. It seemed that the amenities of civilization weren't entirely lost to Squalor Mountain, although judging from the condition of the shack itself, it looked as though the Renfields had sunk their entire family fortune into that satellite dish.
The front door opened as soon as Billy and Hattie Mae got out of the Civic. The entire Renfield clan squeezed out onto the front porch, lining up to the left of the washing machine.
"Billy, I'd like you to meet my ma and pa, my sister Loretta Sue, and my brother Jimmy Ray Bob."
Mrs. Renfield was much younger than Billy had expected. She was little more than a girl herself, with breasts the size of cannonballs spilling out of her halter top. Billy should have remembered. She had only been fourteen when she gave birth to Hattie Mae.
Her husband looked much older. He sported the rugged Jed Clampett look, complete with moth-eaten tee shirt and a straw hat. His chin was covered with gray stubble. His face bore a family resemblance to his wife's, as though he might be her cousin. Or even her father. Billy didn't really want to think about it.
Jimmy Ray Bob, on the other hand, went all out in achieving that inbred, retarded look first made fashionable in the movie Deliverance. His teeth were an orthodontist's dream. His sister's weren't much better. In fact, Billy thought he could see a stream of drool emanating from the right corner of her mouth. Her breasts, however, were even more impressive than her mother's. And her body was in excellent shape indeed. The result of the Ten Minute Hillbilly Workout, Billy supposed.
"We're glad to meet you, Billy," Mrs. Hillbilly said. "We just need to see what kind of man wants to marry our daughter. We want her to be happy. Well, what are you all standing out there for? Come on in. Dinner's waiting. We've got a very busy day planned."
Billy looked around at the dying vegetation and wondered what there could possibly be to do in a busy data on Squalor Mountain.
He found himself seated next to Hattie Mae's sister. Somehow he had been expecting turkey, but the birds were in short supply this year, Mrs. Renfield informed him, what with all those city folks buying them up with their fancy credit cards and all. What the hell, Billy thought. He had never tried coon stew before, and he had tasted turkey a million times.
He was about to take his first bite of sweet potato when he felt Loretta Sue's hand on his crotch. She squeezed his balls as she ran her tongue over her sticky bun. He felt himself becoming erect as she pinched his organ between her thumb and index finger. She was staring straight ahead the whole time, presumably so as not to draw attention to her activities. The stream of drool continued unabated down her chin.