In the life of every married couple comes the time when sexuality has the taint of over-familiarity, which is commonly relieved by the exploration of other options, such as different partners, rubbery appliances, Tupperware, role play and technical supplements of various types, or a combination of all these. We will not claim that our marriage has been an exception to those common experimental phases, but will refrain from recounting any such instances, as in my experience they only serve as a temporary measure and complicate things thereafter.
Suffice it to say that neither my wife Dawn nor I were overly satisfied after the fifteenth year of our marriage, when the death of her great grandaunt Samantha, who had been rumoured to be a witch, left us with her estate and some entirely unexpected options.
The attic of her dingy and highly claustrophobic house turned out to be the confirmation of all the stories we had heard about her, as it was stuffed with vials and flasks of strange liquids, powdery substances and other magical paraphernalia, as well as spell books that looked ancient.
Amongst those books, we found a volume that immediately piqued our curiosity, entitled "Sexual Magic". Studying it at length, identifying and translating the sometimes cryptic references to plants and animal ingredients appeared to be the logical and not altogether unwelcome appreciation of that unexpected heirloom.
In the following we will recount the recipes we have tried out thus far and leave it up to you whether you endeavour to follow our example or not.
Warning: The authors wish to impress that all following recipes carry a certain amount of risk to your health and that of your partners. You may try these at your own risk and responsibility.
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Double your prowess
This is a recipe that was marked as
for males only.
Ingredients: 2 grams of elk testicle, dried (preferably from the right one), 2 spoonful of nutmeg, 3 mandrake roots, medium roasted, approx one teaspoon of semen (preferably human), 12 male pubic hairs, 2 hard-boiled eggs (chicken or duck), 1 gram of dried skins of fly agaric (Amnita muscaria), three drops of shepherd's tears, 350 grams of prime rib steak.
Crush the mandrake roots, mix it with the elk testicle and nutmeg and add half a pint of water. Let it boil; then simmer for approximately fifteen minutes. Add the fly agaric and take the pot off the flame, let it cool down for about an hour. Then add the semen (the fresher the better), the meat and the eggs to the pot (a clay pot is recommended) and put it in the oven at a temperature of 150 degrees Celsius for twenty minutes. Undress and light a candle. Take the pot out of the oven, place it in front of you and avoid touching it with your bare skin. Burn the pubic hairs one by one in the candle flame whilst reciting:
"Arg okan sinu, diple di duple tic to dic, ansi nok dan vi ran."
If you feel more comfortable with that, you may indeed chant it, but under no circumstances with a falsetto voice. After you have burned all pubic hairs (only the ones for the recipe, not yours), lift the lid and add the shepherd's tears. It is advisable to do this with an outstretched arm, as the ensuing gaseous emanation might singe your skin off. Devour the stew as quickly as you can.
The effect:
Dawn had been as curious as me as to the effects of this particular recipe, which might partly have been due to me working very late hours at the office lately and falling asleep instantly after our Tuesday only and only once entertainment. After about fifteen minutes I noticed that sitting became oddly uncomfortable, there was a tugging sensation at my rear and upon standing up and asking Dawn to inspect the area in question she discovered that my buttocks had disappeared and that I had grown another cock and ball sack at their former location.
Admittedly, this was not quite what we had expected nor hoped for, but curiosity took the better of us and Dawn intensified her inspection orally to see if it was equipment one could work with. That was the case, as she sucked and licked my newest bodily extension into full shape, which triggered a corresponding hard-on on the other side. A comparison revealed that the new cock was an exact replica of the former, as were the new balls also.
The benefits:
Our experiments revealed that you can actually come with one of either of your dicks, while the other stays hard and ready for action. The downside is that is very awkward, to say the least, to fuck with your rear and quite distracting for your partner also. However, beneficial certainly is your ability to fuck two women (and/or men if you are so inclined) at the same time, as we established with our next door neighbour Patricia after her screaming fit subsided. Theoretically it is possible to come with both dicks at the same time, but I have yet to achieve the mastery over this particular feat. The effects of the potion last for up to six hours.
The downsides and side-effects:
You may have trouble finding suitable attire if wish to sport your new bodily extension to some sort of social gathering. An additional effect is that you feel constipated for up to four days after that and will feel aroused in the presence of steak and boiled eggs ever after.
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Happy Puss
This is a recipe
for females only.
Ingredients: five left eyes of virgin female frogs, half a gram of leg hair of a grammastola rosea, three drops of blood of a 99 year old woman, drawn by the sting of a rose thorn at midnight under a full moon, two spoonfuls of ground roasted cockroaches, half a cup of your own saliva, half a litre of milk, one banana, some cocoa powder, a freshly woven spider web with three raindrops in it, a small mirror.
Cut the frogeyes into quarters, and then mix them into the saliva. Heat both on the stove, slowly adding first the spider hair and then the blood. When the result turns a nicely brown colour, take it off the stove, let it cool down, and then add the cockroach powder. Put in a blender, add milk, banana and cocoa powder, and mix it all. You can also leave out these last three things, but I advise against it, as they considerably improve the taste of the potion.
With the freshly prepared potion, sit down and lie the mirror down on the ground. Attach the spider web somewhere above the mirror, not more than twenty but not less than ten centimetres away from it. Drink the potion as quickly as you can, then recite the following incantation:
"Care core le, pisi ca pisi ca pisi se."
Then carefully touch the spider web with the tip of your index finger, so that you will cause one of the raindrops to fall down onto the mirror. Repeat the incantation, and then do the same again, so the second raindrop will fall down. Chant or recite the incantation again, then let the third raindrop fall.
After that, all you need to do is wait, the effect of the potion and the spell should become noticeable in a few minutes. It is advised to undress before the ritual.
The effect:
I had been curious about this spell for a long time, but since Keith usually was the one to ensure the happiness of my pussy, he wasn't too interested in me trying it out. But when he had an important business meeting one evening, I decided the time had come to try it out, expecting an enjoyable evening despite his absence. He told me he was going to join his colleagues for some beers after the meeting, thus giving me the time to enjoy the effects of the spell.
After preparing the potion and performing the spell, nothing happened at first. After a while I felt a weird tingling sensation all over my body, but nothing that would have been particular to my pussy, or would have felt like sexual arousal. I did, however, suddenly notice something move in the corner of the room, and felt my whole body go tense. I really, really wanted to see what it was, and slowly started moving into that direction, without making any sound. It was a big moth, which must have flown in earlier, when I had opened the window to let some fresh air in. Without realizing it really, I suddenly was up in the air, jumping toward the insect, reaching out with my paws, trying to catch it.
Paws? Did I say paws? I only noticed at this moment, that instead of hands I had paws covered in smooth black fur. My legs were covered with fur too, and looking around I realized I had a tail. That had to be inspected more closely. After all, it was twitching around in such an interesting way. I jumped, trying to catch my tail. But the damn thing moved along with the rest of my body, of course, escaping my grip. I tried again, and this time managed to touch the very tip for a second -- this surprised me so much, that in a fast gallop I fled to the other end of the room, knocking over the big vase with dried flowers on my way. The loud shattering sound made me try to climb up the curtains covering the window, but I was much too heavy for them, and they fell down, covering and entangling me. When I had managed to free myself, I discovered the moth again, this time flying right towards the small lamp on Keith's desk that I had left on to give the room a dim lighting while I was performing the spell. I continued my hunt ...
When Keith came home, the first thing he found was a huge mess in the living room. The sofa exhibited scratch marks of a rather large animal. Glasses and cups from the cupboards had fallen down and lay smashed on the floor. A bowl with walnuts had also fallen down from the table, and the nuts had been distributed all over the floor. From one corner of the room, he told me later, he could hear a loud sound, reminding him a bit of a motor. There, next to our open fire place, on the most comfortable armchair, sat I, tired of my (successful) hunt of the moth, rolled into a comfortable position and purring happily.
The benefits:
Somehow everything seems more comfortable from the eyes of a cat. Lying on my armchair, watching life bustle by, cuddling up to Keith on the sofa ... I just stopped worrying about all the things I should do or have to do. And fortunately, Keith likes cats and says it was quite comfortable for him too, to cuddle with a human-sized cat. When he started petting me and scratching me behind my ears, I also grew quite horny, but as long as I still looked like a cat he was unwilling to indulge in any sexual activities -- once I started partly transforming back into a human though (especially when I lost the fur in some of the places he likes to put in contact with the mouth), we also had a chance to find out how much more flexible my cat-like body was. Further, Keith said, that he found my happy purring once all my desires were fully satisfied very endearing.
