"Goddamn it Frank, I'm not going to tell you so just shut up about it!"
"Come on, Honey, I promise I won't make a big deal out of it. Come on, tell me."
"You're perverted, Frank."
"Of course I'm perverted, Sweetheart. That's what guys do. It's what we're good at, we're perverted. Come on tell me."
"No! Besides, I'm pissed off at you Frank, leaving me here alone in this goddamn shithole for over a month."
"Come on, Honey, it's the job you know that. Look, I've got a whole month off now. I'll make it up to you. I promise. Come on tell me."
"Damn straight you're going to make it up to me Frank! Fucking India! Couldna been Paris, or London. No! My husband brings me to fucking India, like I'm gonna ride some goddamn elephant or something! I'm forty years old Frank! Do I look like I belong on a goddamn fucking elephant?"
"Of course not, Honey. You're much to beautiful to ever be on an elephant, besides you can't ride elephants when they fuck. Come on tell me."
"You're sick, Frank!
"Come on, Maxine, Honey, just between you and me. Come on, it'll be fun. I promise I won't ever tell anyone."
"Frank, you fucker! You tell just one of your stupid office buddies about this and I'll cut your fucking balls off! I mean it!"
"Tell! Shit, Maxine! Who would I tell! Who would believe me! Come on now, Honey lighten up. You can tell me. You know you want to."
"Oh please Frank, just because you're a sick bastard."
"Come on now, just let me give you a little neck massage and you can tell me all about it. Whataya say?"
"Ummm, Okay, but I don't wanna hear to any shit about it Frank. Hell, I was just fucking around. The guy sounded so funny you know, "Room service, how can I help you?" You shouldna left me here alone Frank. You know how I hate to be alone."
"I know, I know, I won't give you any shit, I promise. No big deal"
"If it was no big deal why do you want to know so fucking bad Frank."
"O.K., O.K., it's a big deal, but in a no big deal kinda way. Come on now."
"Asshole."
"I know."
"Oh, alright."
"Atta girl."
Well, actually, you're not going to get any of your perverted thrills anyway Frank. It really wasn't what I had thought it would be. I never could get off. His dick was too small and he didn't last very long and he turned out to be kind of a jerk."
"Bummer."
"Yeah."
"Maxine."
"Yeah."
"That's not exactly true is it?"
"Well, not exactly."
"You sowed some wild oats didn't you Maxine."
"Yeah."
"Like thoroughbred country in the springtime."
"You're so funny, Frank."
"Maxine."
"Yeah."
"So was he good looking?"
"Yeah."
"Did he have a big dick?"
"Is a thoroughbred a horse, Frank?"
"I see. So how did it go? I mean really."
"Well, I didn't have anything else to do so I told them to send him up in the morning."
"Sounds reasonable, a little morning tryst is always good."
"I liked the afternoon better."
"You fucked in the afternoon too?"
"Well, not exactly. We started in the morning and the next thing I knew it was afternoon."
"You fucked all day long?"
"Well, what else was there to do Frank?"
"I don't know, go shopping?"
"And buy what Frank, a goddamn carved elephant?"
"I see you're point. Well, one day in the life, I'm glad you had a good time."
"Frank."
"Yeah."
"It was for seven days."
"Say what?"
"Well, you know how I am with math Frank. Fucking exchange rate crap anyway."
"I see, so you fucked every day for seven days?"
"Yeah."
"All day long?"
"Yeah."
"Well, what's a week in the long view I guess."
"Frank."
"Yeah."
"I traded your American League baseball card collection."