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Orgasms 101
It is surprising that later in life, a man may still not be sure if and when a woman orgasms. Thus, the reason for this story.
Men don't feel bad. Women aren't expected to know when or how a man orgasms. He just stops momentum and displays the obvious (excluding a cumless climax).
Orgasms are about life and not just sex.
Orgasms sure do keep a woman happy. As a woman loses her inhibitions about sex, the easier it is for a woman to orgasm.
I'm going to explain to you when you are witnessing an orgasm, when an orgasm is very, intense and apparent, and the type of orgasm and by all means let's be humorous.
You may ask be asking; how do I know anything about the subject of orgasms? Well, I'm a woman, I have a vagina and I've been using it for many years. What more do you want from a Literotica writer?
The Definition of an Orgasm
Orgasm
- or-gasm n. -- 1. The highest point of sexual excitement characterized by strong feelings of pleasure and marked normally by vaginal contractions in the female. Also called climax. 2. A similar point of intensity of emotional excitement. [From Greek orgasmos, swelling, excitement, from organ, to swell up, be excited.]: climax; to come; coming; the crisis; cut loose; die; explode; the "feel; feel the earth move; 'gasm; get-off; get wet; goo; high; industrial accident; let it all hang out; le petit mort (the little death, a French term); max out; melt; multiples; the big "O"; pearl necklace; reaching it; seeing god; spend; spoogie; spunk; top of the hill(
http://www.sexuality.org/l/sex/slang.html).
So
What Exactly
is
the Female Orgasm Supposed to
Act
Like?
In a woman, her nipples become typically erect as the clitoris becomes excited and expands. An erection of a sort occurs in the clit (called tumescence) which is due to an increased arterial blood flow (vasocongestion) to the clit; the degree of expansion is small with just a little change in length; and, the clit displays a mild change in thickness.
An increasingly rapid heart rate, blood pressure and genital blood flow also result in a subtle spreading out of the inner and outer labias of the vagina, better known as the pussy.
Vaginal lubrication results (transudation) as well as tiny sweat-like drops appear on the vaginal walls and additional vaginal lubrication from the cervix mucous glands occurs. The amount and thickness of a woman's vaginal lubrication may well depend on her stage in her menstrual cycle primarily because of the changes in the cervical mucus.
As the swelling of the labia causes her inner lips to part and spread outwards, making the opening of the vagina more obvious, the clit genitals change color from flesh tones to at least pinkish (although I've never looked). Sometimes they turn a deep red wine color (especially after childbirth).
Okay, now that the technical education lesson is finished, let's move on to real-life orgasms as the woman is now aroused and has observed physical changes.
Help Your Woman Get Rid of the Reasons
That May Stop Her from Having an Orgasm
In early 2001, Oprah Winfry stated on her daytime talk show that '
over 40 million women had lost the desire for sex
.' This group of women may still be in love with their partners but are perhaps out of touch for various personal or physical reasons.
Some Suggestions to Tell Your Gal if she is Having Difficulty
Tell her to:
Roll back the years of sexually repressive beliefs, anger, resentment, guilt and negativity.
Think positive connections and thoughts about the practice of sex and reduce distracting feelings.
Fall in love with the skin you are in and learn about full relaxation, mental and physical sexuality.
Feel good, feel sexy, and feel sexually aroused (A trip to the lingerie store may be in order to boost self-esteem and confidence).
Connect to deeper thoughts and stimulate your hidden skin of sexual intimacy.
Lay Back and Enjoy the Experience!
After all, your woman is sexually vibrant, confident, orgasmic and magnetic - so prepare her mind for more frequent and intense orgasms.
Does
Your
Woman Orgasm?
Now, guys don't feel bad if you're in the heat of the moment and didn't notice your gal just had an orgasm.
Women don't notice either.
It's okay to ask, "Honey, did you have an orgasm?" If she is nice, she won't expect you (or want you) to always know when she is experiencing an orgasm.
Guys, compare it to looking for the hole when you're excited. Sometimes it's easy to find and sometimes it's harder to find. (After all, it feels a little spongy down there).
Also, during an orgasm, a woman can fool you or be very quiet (Some women that is)!
As a woman, it seems pretty obvious to me when an orgasm occurs in the female gender (of course, I am a woman). Unless your woman is having some kind of physical seizure, she probably just orgasmed. Simple as that. But remember, women are like crock pots. They take a while to warm up.
Of course, it's much easier to tell when a man has a climax. When a man has an orgasm, all play stops and that seems kind of obvious, too. Simple as that! But remember, men are like microwave ovens. It doesn't take a ton of excitement to make the buzzer go off and announce, "I've done."
Since wearing raincoats is somewhat more common these days, it
can
be difficult to see the obvious physical ejaculating changes in a man. As women, we assume you're done if stop pounding her (especially when you stop and then hand us a used condom).
Which reminds me? Why not just throw the condom on the floor so the dog can find it when the housekeeper or family visits?
At times, a woman may fake an orgasm if she is just not ready to cum or can't orgasm after a prolonged period of arousal. Maybe she just won't cum. Maybe, it will take hours for her to cum. Maybe she just wants to get the ordeal over with and fakes a cum. (After all, Swedish scientists have found that the female brown trout fakes orgasms in about half of her spawnings).