Abigail sat weeping on the couch of her darkened apartment, arms hugging her knees to her chest. Gazing with puffy red eyes into the light of the TV she watched her failure play out on the evening news.
"Police are calling for assistance in identifying a woman who invaded Alhambra High School this afternoon. Surveillance footage shows she entered the grounds through an unlocked side door and made her way unchallenged to a science classroom."
Grainy black and white footage showed her pigtails swaying as she wandered the corridor, peering through windows looking for a room that was in use. None of the movies she'd ever watched had ever shown how big a school was, it had taken her a few minutes to find any sign of people.
"The classroom in question was in use by a sophomore class at the time. Police believe the woman entered the school with intent to expose herself to minors, and fled when confronted by a teacher."
The corridor footage showed her fleeing back the way she'd come, teacher in pursuit. Her gaze drifted from the chase on screen to her discarded clothes, the tiny plaid skirt and still knotted top lying where she'd abandoned them next to the door.
"The woman was last seen fleeing southeast down South Fourth street, anyone with any information on the identity or whereabouts of the woman are asked to come forward. For our next story we cross..."
Abigail's awareness of the world faded as her mind turned inward, reflecting on the disaster of her vacation. It was the first she'd managed to save up for on the miserable salary a lesser devil made. Years of filing soul transfer records and picking up the slack for the greater devils, all spent waiting for the day she'd get to visit the earth above. While waiting she'd built a collection of movies, her favourite ones, the ones that fully exhibited the sex she loved so much. When she finally got her vacation she was ecstatic, for one glorious week she'd be on earth as a human and her life would be like in the movies.
Except it wasn't, it was nothing like the movies. Every attempt she'd made to emulate that shining world had ended in dismal failure.
She'd started by ordering a stack of pizzas. She'd dressed just like the lead in Meatlovers 3, curling her hair and putting on her tiniest nightie with her favourite strawberry set underneath. She thought she'd set the scene perfectly, but the delivery man thought otherwise. When she told him she didn't have the full amount, but that she'd do anything to make up the difference, he'd turned to leave. She'd panicked, begged him to wait and handed over the cash, she had wanted the food almost as much as she wanted the dick after all.
Then with three large pizzas and a loaf of garlic bread to feed her brain she sat down to puzzle out the problem. She'd purred her order over the phone, her outfit was perfect, and she'd touched his chest in just the right way. So why hadn't he fucked her? With no ideas of her own she set the movie playing, slipping her free hand into her panties as she ate and watched. By the end she'd thought she had her answer, she'd forgotten to ask for extra salami.
Armed with this new insight she tried again, but the more times she repeated the request the more she confused the driver. Again she gave up and paid him. She was rejected by two more delivery drivers before she ran out of numbers to call, and repeat attempts revealed they'd blocked her number.
It was a disheartening start, but she wouldn't let it stop her.
She called a plumber in next, but he wasn't interested in sharing his pipe with her. The electrician was cute, but she screamed horrible things at her when she asked for help operating one of her toys. The poor cable guy had no idea what she wanted when she asked him to show her his thickest cable, in the end she sent him away disappointed. It was like she was living in a world governed by rules no one else understood.
She was eating a burger she'd had to walk down to the restaurant to eat when inspiration sat down at the next table.
"Nice save there Stace, a few seconds slower and we'd all be in detention right now. Imagine being stuck in a classroom with Professor Liverspot all afternoon, can you believe what he did to Penny last week?"
The conversation continued without Abigail's notice, she was too busy stuffing the last of her food in her face, desperate to get home as soon as possible. Detention! Everyone always got laid in detention, she should have thought of it sooner. Her outfit would have to be perfect, she only had one day left, this would probably be her last chance.
It had been her last chance, and it hadn't worked. Now curled up in bed with tears running slowly down her face she was beginning to think she'd never had a chance to begin with. She'd been naive to think real life could be as perfect as the movies, wasted her trip chasing an impossible dream. This was her last night on earth, tomorrow at dawn she would be back at work, nothing but years of paper shuffling to look forward to. She clicked off the light and curled up under the sheets, willing the night to take her troubles away.
~~~
It was still dark when she woke, a few hours remaining before dawn took her away. There was something odd about the night sounds, they were louder than they should be. From the lounge she heard a stack of DVDs clatter, a whisper stifled. There was someone in the apartment.
She slipped out of bed, the air cool on her almost naked body. She tiptoed over to the closet, had just slipped inside when the bedroom door opened. Through the slats of the closet door she watched the intruder creep carefully into the room. He was tall, dressed in dark colours with a balaclava concealing his face. A duffel bag hung from one hand as he began to rummage through drawers with the other.
He was exactly what she needed. He had enough muscle to overpower her, and he'd probably be rough when he took her. She sank slowly to her knees, one hand sliding into the panties that were her sole item of clothing. Would he yank them off her? Or just pull them aside to get at what he wanted? She couldn't wait to find out, she pulled her wet fingers out and readied to make her move as he headed for the closet. He was not going to get away.
The burglar opened the closet, freezing when he spotted her on the floor. She sprang, grabbing onto his jeans.
"Wha-"
He stumbled backwards to end up sitting on the bed with Abigail at his feet.
