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Copyright Oggbashan January 2019
The author asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.
This is a work of fiction. The events described here are imaginary; the settings and characters are fictitious and are not intended to represent specific places or living persons.
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The two lesbian spiders are perched on the picture rail in Og's large study, resting after a frantic session of leg tangling.
"Ariadne?"
"Yes, Arachne?"
"I'm bored. Nothing happens here. Og sits for hours at his computer and ignores me when I scamper across his keyboard trying to communicate."
"At least he didn't squash you, Adne. He could have done."
"He gave me a headache, Achne, banging his keyboard. I was tumbled about inside with all the fluff and coffee spills."
"Anything interesting in there?"
"There was this tiny fly. Barely a taste. The rest was just rubbish. He ought to clean his keyboard more often."
"Don't say that, Adne. If he started cleaning he might suck us up into a vacuum cleaner. Who knows where we'd go? This is a nice place to be. There are enough insects to feed us and we have no worries..."
"Except that I'd like babies, Achne. I'm three months old. I'm getting past my best. We've got each other but..."
"We'll find a male spider for you soon. Between us we could entangle him in our webs, wrap him in layers of silk, you could ride him and then..."
"Lunch!" They shout together.
The door opens. The spiders duck back out of sight.
Og strides across the room and picks up the telephone, pressing a speed dial code.
"Lisa?"
Only Og's side of the conversation is heard.
"You haven't forgotten the dress rehearsal tonight? Shall I pick you up at seven thirty? You've got your Catherine of Aragon costume back from the cleaners?"