Just out of Time
I was 2 minutes late leaving home.
What!!
Two minutes, well, that's not much.
Why does 2 minutes mean anything?
Well, today it was the difference between life, and death.
Ok, I can see you are not following the thought processes here.
Okay, I leave home promptly at 7.45am.
By the way, my name is Edward Draper, not Ted, Teddy, or any other derivation of the name.
I am happily divorced, partly because my ex-wife couldn't get away from the fact that my surname 'Draper' was fashioned from the occupation of my great grandparents several generations past.
It was how they made their fortune selling cloth and other things necessary for the making of clothes and other assorted items of apparel.
Gradually, generation by generation, the business and the fortune filtered down to me, expanding as it did so.
Even so, the family concern, and my fortune, was protected by trusts, deeds and other legal things, that meant that the money hungry, gold-digging b1tch, couldn't get her hands on it.
Although she tried.
My God, how she tried.
To no avail.
And much to her disgust, and that of the boyfriend who thought, unwisely, that he would, by default, get his hands on my money by virtue of knocking her up and causing our divorce, well accelerating it really, that the division of assets which she would receive following the divorce would keep him in the style in which he would rapidly become accustomed.
Not so.
I live in a two storey house in a gated community in a more respectable part of the suburbs, by myself now.
Well, not really, I have the obligatory house master named Thomas and two servants of the house master, one named Spencer and the other William.
Thomas is a seal point Siamese cat, enough said, and he rules the house and the two servants with a paw of steel.
The servants of Thomas are two of the most placid creatures I know.
They are dogs.
Spencer is a black Labrador, and William is a tan Dobermann Pinscher.
When formerly introduced, they will be your friends for life, but should some miscreant invade their property without an introduction, just let me say the results will not be pretty, and several hours of their future will be lost until a rescue is conducted either by me or the local constabulary, all of whom are known to the servants.
Oh, they are not my servants, they are Thomas's servants; after all, he is a Siamese cat, and his rightful place in the world, or at least in my house, is Master.
I reverse my car, the latest Toyota Camry Altise Sedan, I'm sure you know the one, with all the bells and whistles, electric everything, keyless start - stop button, front driver and passenger, side front and rear, airbags, the whole kit and kaboodle.
It's a great car, really!!
What it doesn't do, unfortunately, is drive itself.
No, I, or someone else, has to do that.
But if someone else tries to drive it without permission, well, it won't, doesn't, can't.