In 2024 it is particularly hard
To remember why we believe in the white-bearded bard.
While TikTok and Instagram spread the brain-rot
Only some of us are reminded of why Santa's so hot.
A young woman going by the name of Glenda Mae Sue
Is one of hardly any her age that still has a seasonal clue.
She always believed,
No, she never forgot,
And when she grew up, she tickled her bean to Mr. Claus...
Whether others believed it or not.
"He is too real!" She declared
To her University mates.
Who refused to believe--
They'd moved on to other hot dates.
But Glenda Mae Sue,
With her ass-length platinum blonde hair,
Only had eyes for the jolly man in a red suit,
And she didn't want to share.
Despite an innocent face
And wire-rimmed glasses,
The temperature of her loins
Could melt frozen molasses.
The boys all asked her out
(She had the perkiest tits)
But Glenda turned them swiftly down,
There's only one lap in which she sits.
The mall Santas took out restraining orders,
The red cross had to make a PSA,
It seemed no one was gonna stand
in Glenda Mae Sue's horny way.
After so many years
With nary an encounter
On December 24th, she put out a plate of her best cookies--
Anything to make him mount her.
She hung mistletoe over every door,
Then put out a warm glass of milk.
Slipped into her skimpy Christmas PJs
made of the softest, thinnest silk.
And fell asleep in a chair by the fireplace.
Not a creature was stirring,
As the snow fell outside.
When suddenly hoofbeats
Signaled the end of a wintery ride.
Then down through the chimney
Came the fat man himself!
Chris Kringle, he's here!
Much hotter than any elf.
As Glenda Mae Sue
Dreamed of humping and egg nog,
He tiptoed right past her,
Disturbing not one fire-place log.
He placed a big box of presents
under the tree.
Then turned to make his escape,
When he noticed her dosing blissfully.
It's not very often
That Santa stops what he's doing,
But Glenda Mae Sue's cleavage
Set thoughts in his mind brewing.
He snapped out of it,
Grabbing his sack,
But he tripped on the carpet!
And fell flat on his back.
Glenda jumped from the chair,
Startled awake,
She saw Santa on the floor
And she started to quake.
"Oh Santa, it's you!
You've finally come!"
She panted the words out
But she wasn't close to done.
He stumbled to his feet
Almost 40 inches taller.
She battered her eyelashes,
Feeling quite a bit smaller.
"Can I open my present?"
She asked with a smile on her face.
"Oh um, I really must be going--"
Santa tried, but couldn't slow her pace.
Glenda grabbed the box from its place
And tore the wrapping free.
Inside was a vibrator and a dildo
And she yelped with glee!
(Elves are the best at making toys of all kinds
Especially those you put in your pussy
And up the behind.)
"Oh Santa, they're perfect!"
She held up the rubber cock in her hand
"It's just right size for my hole.
How'd you know I love to get rammed?"
Santa blushed redder than his suit,
This wasn't at all proper...
"Young lady, I really must be going..."
The bulge in his pants was becoming a whopper...
"You can't leave yet, Santa,
I must show my appreciation."
She took his hand,
"I think you deserve some relaxation."
"I'm flattered, I am
But I've a long night ahead..."
"That's really no excuse not to get in my bed."
"It's the north pole code. My hands they are tied!"
"Then why is your candy cane growing 10 inches wide?"
She took a step forward,
and he took one right back.
His boner flopping around
As he tried to hide it with his sack.
So Glenda Mae Sue
Looked up right above,
And pointed to the mistletoe,
Then declared her love.
"Santa, I must tell you, it's my one biggest wish."
"Dear, I don't know what to tell you, this one's a miss."
Stepping onto a chair
She cornered the jolly man.
Then held her lips an inch from his
As erotically as one can.
She kissed him quite sweetly
Warm enough to melt any heart,
But then she slid her tongue in,
Like a true Christmas tart.
Poor Santa was helpless,
