Chad’s Chronicles

Life is hard when you're 19, not smart enough to get into college and poor. It's pretty much the trifecta for not being able to get attention from a girl, yet alone keep it for more than a fleeting moment. Unfortunately in the fall of 2003, Chad was coming to the realization that this was his reality.

Chad had already lost two jobs that year and had few prospects for finding a third. He couldn't afford to live on his own, didn't have a relationship with his dad, and had a mother who's financial situation, remarkably, was even worse than his own. Each day presented a challenge. Government assistance only went so far. Money for gas station hot dogs, beer and Bojangles was obtained through a variety of hustles, gambling and an occasion theft from those more fortunate.

Despite waking up in the musty, poorly lit, crowded confines of the trailer Chad shared with his roommate Ricky, today was going to be different. Chad had won three tickets to the big game at Memorial Stadium two nights prior when someone bet him he couldn't dislocate his own finger and pop it back into place. It was a big score for someone who had never attended a game as a paying customer. Sure, Chad saw a few big games working in concessions and cleaning up empty cups, hot dog wrappers, discarded napkins and half eaten containers of nachos, but having his own seat and a ticket stub to prove it gave Chad a sense of pride and belonging that was about as rare as a January thunderstorm.

If Chad was being honest though, he'd admit that he was even more excited about the prospect of tailgating with one of the hottest girls in Oconee County. Her name was Lacey and she didn't even know Chad existed. Lacey had long blond hair with soft curls, blue eyes, and above average tits. She probably had just walked out of the room when someone coined the phrase "an ass you could bounce a quarter off of." The closest Chad had ever come to speaking with Lacey was when he mowed her dad's yard and she went inside either because of the noise or being uncomfortable about Chad and the rest of the crew staring at her as she laid by the pool in her fire engine red bikini glimmering in the sunlight with a sheen of Hawaiian Tropic tanning oil.

Chad made up for his lack of intelligence and ambition by being fun. One could say Chad had more friends than he could count, but that wouldn't do it justice since he couldn't count very high. A group of about twenty of these friends were going to get together two hours before kickoff to partake in the south's finest tradition, College Football Tailgating.

Chad showed up to the event in his finest cargo shorts and knockoff Ed Hardy tee shirt. He was out of place amongst the mostly college educated guys who wore their conservative khaki pants, braided belts and plaid polo shirts that had become known as their "Saturday uniforms". That was part of his charm though and everyone loved it. The reactions to Chad were totally different than the reaction to the acid washed jeans and Best Buy uniform shirt that Chad's friend Tickle wore. A much older, particularly uppity, attendee named Ben Galine went so far as to ask Tickle to change into a better shirt or he wouldn't hang out with him. Ben dared not ask the same of Chad.

Soon after Chad and Tickle arrived, the first three girls showed up. They were all wearing sun dresses and the tall boots that were popular at the time. The guys were particularly appreciative of how the girls erect nipples showed through the light weight material of the dresses on the brisk 63 degree morning. While the majority of those that arrived early partook in Bloody Mary's and mimosas, Chad nervously threw back Natural Lights in between a couple shots of Jäegermeister. While all social situations made him anxious, the pending arrival of Lacey had him particularly on edge.

Next to arrive was a friend that everyone called Mauldin, a nickname endeared to him since he was the only person anyone knew who would admit to growing up in the small town famous for nothing more than being the birthplace of discount grocery chain BI-LO. Chad's eyes noticeably rolled at Mauldin's arrival because he feared Mauldin could be his chief rival in the pursuit of Lacey's affection. The reason was obvious if you saw him. Even flaccid, Mauldin's penis had the girth of a toilet paper roll. It was impossible not to notice with his intentional choice of athletic fit stretchable pants that didn't become popular until many years later.

While making the first trip of many to the Port O Let, Chad heard one of the girls proclaim "Oh it's Jimmy, hey hey." Jimmy was walking with a another friend who was known around campus as being a real Don Juan. This beautiful day that started so well seemed to be slipping away. Chad knew he wasn't the only one who would be vying for Lacey's attention. Deep down, Chad had a feeling that his continued streak of good luck might be coming to an end. This had crossed his mind when he woke to the comforting thought that he and Ricky, who shard a bed in their trailer, had made it all night without accidentally touching penises. Could that coupled with winning game tickets and an opportunity to be noticed by Lacey while tailgating be asking too much?

Perhaps not. Lacey finally arrived with her friend Shirley and Shirley's boyfriend that everyone called Tig. It was well known that the Tigers were undefeated in games where Shirley went down on Tig in the final moments before heading into the stands. Their arrival was cause for extreme optimism. It also meant that Chad would need help setting up the makeshift tent, affectionately known as the "head shed", used to conceal the pending blow job. At that moment, Chad could feel his average length penis becoming erect in his pants. He was confused if it was because Lacey arrived or if it was due to the thought of Shirley takings Tig's hard cock into her mouth in less than an hour. Either way, Chad was living his best life at that moment in time.

The tailgate itself, other than the "head shed", was fairly typical. Lots of beer, cheap bourbon, and $8 bottles of wine for the snobs of the group were set up in a makeshift bar located in the back of a Chevy Tahoe parked in spot 19B. Chips, crackers, a vegetable tray and two bottles of Cheez Whiz picked up at Publix by Lacey's cousin Beth were spread across a card table brought by Ben. The scene couldn't have been more perfect if painted by Norman Rockwell.

With 90 minutes remaining before kickoff, there were twenty tailgaters in all. Laughter and flirting between the singles of the group defined the moment. Joe, from New York, occasionally lobbed an inappropriate comment towards the non-single women in the group to judge their reactions. It was well known that Joe was into joining couples in trysts after a few cocktails in opposition to his conservative persona of an engineer when sober.

Chad's morning couldn't be going better. He was riding that perfect level of intoxication that made him funny but not obnoxious. Lacey was even heard saying "How have we never met before?" after listening to a few of Chad's outlandish stories. While the safe bet was that Chad would follow Lacey around like a puppy dog desperate for attention, it actually was the opposite. Wherever Chad went, Lacey followed.

The countdown to kickoff was down to thirty minutes. Everyone knew what that meant, none more so than Tig. He embarrassingly had to cover his erection, visible through his Dockers, with his hands. Into the shed they went. The only visible part of either their bodies was Tig's head which stuck out above the rest of the makeshift tent. The unmistakable sound of Shirley sucking Tig's penis was audible to all in attendance. Joe, Ben, and Ben's wife seemingly got so aroused that they inconspicuously disappeared to Ben's company provided minivan.

Everyone could see the exact moment when Tig exploded in Shirley's mouth based on his facial expression. In unison, the entire party (with obvious exception of Shirley) yelled "it's a great day to be a Tiger." Victory was assured. The next 3 1/2 hours was simply an opportunity to watch it all play out.

As everyone started their walk to the game, Lacey asked Chad where his seats were located. Chad seized this as an opportunity to invite Lacey and her cousin Beth to use his other two seats in the lower level. Tickle and Chad's friend McLovin, who had arrived late after an early morning fishing excursion, were relegated to the upper level using Lacey and Beth's tickets. Chad's friends loved him in a non-sexual way and were happy to help him in his quest to get inside Lacey's panties. The day simply could not have been shaping up better.

The sun quickly broke through the clouds after the game began. The heat and sexual tension between Chad and Lacey seemed to rise in unison as the game progressed. Chad's mind started racing the moment Lacey grabbed his thigh excitedly while telling him a story about the time she got stuck between a refrigerator and a wall while trying to reach the power cord.

Chad couldn't even tell you the score of the game. His 19 year old brain, drowning in teenage testosterone, could only think of Lacey's perfect C Cup breasts, muscular thighs and athletic calves. Her stomach was flat with no defined separation from her lower abdomen. She knew what this was doing to him and she loved it. Just to tease him, she unbuttoned the top button of her shorts while seated to accentuate this feature possessed by less than 1% of the women in attendance.

Just as everything in Chad's life was seemingly coming together, something inexplicable that would change his life forever was thrust upon him more suddenly than a lightning bolt. After jumping up and down to celebrate a go-ahead touchdown, everyone sat down. Chad had strategically sat between Lacey and her cousin Beth so he could monopolize Lacey's attention. While Lacey's athletic thighs stayed within the confines of her seat, Beth's did not. If one described the two girls in equine parlance, Lacey was the thoroughbred and Beth was the Clydesdale. Beth was wearing a somewhat short sundress as did many of the other girls in attendance. When Chad and Beth sat down, their sweaty legs touched up against each other. They immediately made eye contact with a look that undeniably proved that the feeling of the moist skin sliding with the same sensation of a penis inside a wet pussy turned each of them on in a way that made them want to strip down naked and fuck like they were the main attraction of the 81,473 people in attendance.

Awkward silence followed. Chad knew it. Beth knew it. Lacey had no idea. Lacey's insecurities became clearly visible as Chad's attention was no longer singularly focus on her and shifted towards Beth. Did she saying something wrong? Did the heat from the day draw out her propensity to develop body oder? Was he just trying to impress her by being nice to Beth, who typically didn't draw attention from guys? Nothing seemed to make sense.

Fortunately for all, the game came to end less than 20 minutes after that electrifying moment. Spirits were high as everyone exited the stadium. In stark contrast, Chad's 5'9, 160 pounds frame looked small walking next to Beth as opposed to looking like a buck walking into the stadium with a 5'1, 110 pound Lacey. Over the 90 minutes that followed everyones arrival back to the tailgate, the group systematically broke down into pairs to head to private locations with the exception of Ben, his wife and Joe who appeared even more impassioned after imbibing at least a dozen mini bottles of tequila that they snuck into the stadium.

Chad and Beth continued their flirtation over a six pack of Zima that someone put in the cooler in a veiled attempt at contributing to the party. Chad was frantically thinking of places he could take Beth where they could be alone. Chad knew the bed in his trailer wasn't big enough for the two of them, especially if Ricky were to return home early from a weekend trip to research a timeshare investment at Dollywood. Chad's concerns were alleviated when Beth asked if he would go with her to a house she was watching for a friend who was in New York to see Shania Twain in concert.

After a short drive to a posh lakefront home, Beth and Chad entered the house and headed straight for a bedroom. Chad had previously had what could be described as awkward sex with four women (five if you count the time he hooked up with Ricky's aunt but finished in her hand as she tried to guide his cock into her love pocket). Even though Beth was two years older than Chad, he was concerned that she might not know what she was doing. It quickly became apparent that his concerns were unfounded.

Beth was an absolute sexual dynamo who threw Chad around the bed like a rag doll. She put Chad in positions to please her that Chad hadn't even imagined up to that point in his life. Beth and Chad seamlessly transitioned from one position to another as if choreographed by Bob Fosse. The Circus Freak to Froggie Style to Inverted Missionary to Tilt-A-Whirl where Chad was unfortunately not strong enough to hold Beth in the air. After dropping to the floor, Beth screamed "give it to me Big Daddy," upon which Chad settled into the Modified coital-alignment technique until climaxing all over Beth's oversized chest.

At that moment, Chad started to realize that he was falling in love for the first of what would turn out to be many times.