Trying to take my mind off, trying to recap.
I thought: its Saturday. I usually feel pretty crapped out on Saturday what with the working week and social drinks and what have you.
I wake up and find that my tongue has stuck to the roof of my mouth. My tongue was doing its usual thing but something unusual was going on.
I went out on the razzle in search of something hard, and I got it; but what I got, wasn't exactly attached to someone else.
I rolled over on the bed (thank God I was alone because something didn't feel right). I was wearing my usual bed time gear: panties and a tee shirt; one that wasn't all that clean.
I rolled onto my front and the area around my crotch felt kind of weird.
I rolled back and hitched up my tee shirt. To my amazement I was sporting a big black dick!
I thought I've bought somebody home (being pretty much out of it). They've shagged me. And I've got a bit left in.
I kept expecting someone (black presumably) to come out of the bathroom, or worst still to be lying in the bathroom (having been detached from his penis); in a pool of his own blood.
Fuck it, I thought. I'm going to spend my whole Saturday talking to the police and cleaning the bathroom floor.
Isn't it funny what runs through your mind at moments of stress?
It got worse. I must have had a lot to drink because the next thing I knew I had to have a massive pee.
I staggered out to the bathroom. Luckily there was no black man lying there in a pool of his own blood but there was still this massive penis attached to the front of me.
It was starting to become incredibly stiff. I pulled down my pants. The thing had quadrupled its size. I thought how the hell is this going to work?
You know how it is boys. The business end of that thing was pointing nowhere near the bowl. I thought: this is going to be complicated.
I was bursting. I tried bending over and pointing it downwards towards the toilet but I only got pee in my eye.
I sat down on the side of the bath. I thought I'm starting to over react. I tried deep breathing. After a while the gigantic thing started to go down.
The thing was dangling there like a rubber hose. I thought I've got to get a grip; which I did.
I started to play with it, and again it started to get stiff. Bugger, I thought, totally transfixed by the size of it; this isn't getting me anywhere.
I spent the whole weekend masturbating.
That thing was insatiable. It kept going up and down, up and down; like it was demanding to be fed.
Monday morning all I could think about was the penis.
I was just sitting there at my desk with it between my legs; like a third leg.