Author's Notes: Even stuck-up boys aren't as high and mighty as they pretend to be. This is especially true of quiet, haughty Charles Eastleigh Callum. (Comedy, for shits n giggles. 2007 words.)
*****
"Eugene!" Charles hissed, glaring at his brother with disdain. "I told you, you can't eat in here!"
"Oh, relax, it's just a little ice-cream!" Gene sighed, licking a fat drop of the melted cream from his wrist before it could drip down his arm to splatter against the seat again.
"Just get a wet wipe and clean it up!" Charles groaned, stopping at the red light and turning to fuss with his twin. "They're in the glove compartment. I mean it, Gene! I put these rules in place for a-"
But Charles had officially lost his brother's attention. Gene hummed quietly to himself, a single eyebrow raising as he grabbed a wipe from Charles' secret stash as a small something fell out of the glove compartment and into his lap. Beside him, Charles had his eyes on the road and was nagging, as usual, blissfully unaware of Gene holding up a small tube of clear lipgloss to his face to peer at it. Vanilla? He squinted at his brother, a small smile forming on his face.
Charles never wore makeup, so why did he have some hidden in his car? He finished his ice-cream cone in one large, obscene swallow and busied himself with absentmindedly dabbing at the upholstery, all while inspecting the little hidden treasure. It was only half full, which meant somebody had been using it. He bit the insides of his cheeks to hold back a giggle and put the tube back under the wipes. He closed the glove compartment, fiddling with the used wet wipe as he watched his brother continue to speak to him like he was a petulant child, and not a grown man. He wondered what Mother would have to say about the lip gloss...
--
Richard knocked on the large doors to his eldest son's study, sitting back with his hands behind his back as he waited for Charles to open the door. A moment passed and nothing happened, he couldn't even hear the scuff of his chair against the carpet. Richard tossed a glance over his shoulder, peering around to see if maybe he was nearby. He wasn't.
Richard slipped inside, feeling a little... Peculiar about invading his son's personal space like this. He had his own office, and understood the importance of having a sanctum to think in, to be alone in where nobody would bother them. But he'd run out of his favorite ink for his fountain pen, and he really couldn't swap pens mid-document! It'd drive him crazy! So, instead, here he was, feeling incredibly ill at ease as he opened up the drawers in Charles' desk, careful not to touch anything he didn't absolutely have to.
Charles was particular like he was when it came to his personal effects, and hated anything out of place or disorganized... His internal monologue came to a halt when something out of the ordinary caught his eye. He puckered his lips, eyebrows raising as he picked it up and held it to the light to see it better, cursing himself for forgetting his glasses on his own desk. He squinted, rolling it between his fingers. It was that sticky nonsense women wore on their lips, he noticed with a sly grin. He untwisted the cap, his nose scrunching at the light coffee scent he found inside. What had Barbara called this particular flavor? Mocha, he thought triumphantly.
He replaced the tube carefully, not missing the implications of finding something clearly not belonging to his son amongst his son's actual belongings. It was obvious Charles had a lady friend! His chest swelled with pride as he grinned, glancing knowingly at the top of the always too-tidy desk. He'd always wondered why Charles preferred as little things on his desk as possible, and, well, now he knew! It was such a bother to pick everything up off the floor after a strike of passion had taken over. Even the most mild-mannered of girls had a habit of knocking everything to the floor when throes of pleasure were involved.
He may not have found the ink he was looking for, but he left with something much better. Pride in his son. Who knew he was such a man!
--
Barbara sang softly under her breath, some horrible, but catchy, rap song she'd heard on the radio earlier. She'd given Landa the day off, too antsy to sit still and let another woman clean her house for her. Richard and Gene had both come to her with tales of strange things they'd found out about Charles, and if truth be told, she was ecstatic. Her little boy, all grown up and hiding a love-interest from them! A girl love interest! Sure, lipgloss was no guarantee that whoever it was would be able to bear her grandchildren, but she had hope!