Dateline: December 27, 2012
Horatio Elton Algiers the third was content. The machine was finally almost finished, it had taken decades.
He was going to know the truth, no more speculations. He stepped back, watching the automatic flush urinal do it's thing, once again forgetting to zip up his pants as he did not even notice the splashes of urine on his shoes.
That was a never ending joke around the Hadron Supercollider, the work crew would see that and mutter, "Stupid Motherfucker" under their breath.
Doctor Algiers was the world's smartest man, you see. All of the newspaper and TV stories said so.
He was so smart, so lost completely in his own thoughts that he often had no idea at all of what was going on around himself.
Doctor Algiers first noticed the slight hum as he pushed the button on the elevator for the main floor level. It got louder as the lift moved downwards.
His mind was on Frank, the new hire that had been brought in. There was a nagging thought deep in the back of his mind, right behind the theories of space and time and it's relationship to dark energy.
There was something about a stimulus package also, all of a sudden they had monstrous amounts of funding from somewhere. The government had hired nearly everyone they could find, putting them to work building things.
Doctor Algiers had been busy thinking, so when Frank had walked in saying he was an electrician, he asked him if he could read blueprints.
"Yea." The man had said.
Then when handing him the wiring schematic for the control panel, Frank had asked him why they were white instead of blue.
That went right over the head of Doctor Algiers, his thought had been on black holes and how they were created at the time. Such magical forces of the universe, everything held in a perfect dance and balance, a wondrous thing to think about, discover.
He had no time for the daily trials of life, or to be concerned about wiring, things like that.
He also knew he needed to go upstairs to take a leak. Why they put all the damn johns three levels up he never knew, they just did.
But then this was a government project, which often explained everything.
Frank was standing there looking at something when Doctor Algiers walked into the main control room. For a moment, he didn't understand, then he saw the glow. It was so bright he could not look at it, he had to look away.
"What did you just do?" He asked Frank.
"I don't know, I was hooking up the fucking wires is all."
Doctor Algiers looked down at the open door of the main control panel, saw the black wires were hooked directly to the green ones. The glow was now bright white and getting larger, the deep hum beginning to overwhelm the room.
"Oh, dear!" He said.
"Hey, it's not my faul...!" was as far as Frank got.
_
The new President was sitting in his office, discussing how they could convince the people that having government take over the fast food industry would be good for them.
Getting control of major industry wasn't too hard, first grab General Motors, run Toyota out of business. Probably grab them too when they got to the point where they couldn't pay their light bill.
Banking wasn't hard at all to get control of, all he had to do was wave money and they all lined right up!
Too late they found out about the pay Czar.
Once that was done health care was next, That was a bit harder but a few bribes and some threats and the Senators and Congress fell right into line. Then energy, get control of that and there would be plenty of money to pay the Chinese their 1% interest on the treasury notes.
Right behind that was the plans for the construction industry, easy stuff, just say he had to protect the public from shoddy workmanship.
Things were falling right into line.
The Czars were all sitting around discussing how much salt was going to be allowed in each Big Mac and fries and how many calories would be in the breakfast, lunch and dinner program for all school children until age 28 when one of his aides rushed in and whispered something in his ear.
"Oh, shit!" The President exclaimed, leaping to his feet. The aide said something else, then the President's face turned pure white.
Considering his nationality, that was noticeable.
"What's up, boss?" His chief of staff asked.
"There has been an accident, the Supercollider is creating a black hole, and it has a runaway nuclear fire."
The Vice President started to make a wisecrack about "black holes", since that comment made him think of the fact that the President's wife was...
He managed to get his mouth shut barely in time, the last few times he had said something without thinking that fucking Fox news had had a field day.
"Just wait until we get total control of the media." He thought, then it hit him what the President had just said.
"What?"
"The Supercollider, it is out of control."
"Oh, shit!" The Vice President exclaimed, looking around quickly to make sure there were no microphones nearby.
"What do we do?" The Car Czar asked, having overheard some of that.
"How about we send some bombers over there?" The Armed Forces Czar asked.
"And do what?" Asked the Secretary of State in a snotty tone. She always managed to remain calm, no matter what.
That was her strong point, even back when she had caught her hubby sticking his cigar in that bimbo, she had remained stone calm.
Amazing what a few simple pills will do.
She had waited until they were inside with the door closed before she kicked hubby right in the nuts that time, then went out with a smiling face and met with the press.
She even stayed completely calm when her husband stood on stage, with world peace on the line and dignitaries perched on chairs behind him, answering all of those questions about sperm stains on dresses.
Later she kicked him in the balls a second time, just for the hell of it.
Yep, a few pills solved almost everything.
The Armed Forces Czar was saying something about her being a bitch, in his usual nasty manner. Irritated, she calmly walked over to him and kicked him in the balls.
That felt good, she thought as she walked out the door. She went down the hall to the Presidential bedroom, saw the door was open and just walked in.
The President's wife looked up in surprise, then smiled. She had a text in her hand.
"I just heard on Twitter." She said.
"We might as well, I know you and I have always wanted to." The Secretary of State told her, as she reached out and took her in her arms. She kicked the door shut, it locked automatically as they kissed.
Back in the main meeting room, the Armed Forces Czar was suggesting using nukes to blow the fucking black hole to kingdom come, he had been wanting to use the nukes on something for years now.
He was still pissed off that they wouldn't let him nuke Grenada, then when that Chavez guy had done some yapping, right behind that the little turd from North Korea?
Golden fucking opportunities there, what the hell was the matter with all of the pussies in government, anyway?
Drop a few nukes here and there, Iran would get the piss scared out of them, then they could get all that oil.
