Becoming Monsters: Whammed

This is a One-Shot-story of the Becoming Monsters universe by Ai Loves, setting used with permission. All canonical and mechanical errors are my own.

---

WHAM!

Wendell Aaron Meyer was dead. But not because of the crash that he was involved in. To be precise, he was undead. That's what you get, when the world is mixed up by The Change, and your new Status Screen lists your race now as "Zombie". For him as the class nerd it was sort of an upgrade.

Wendell waited for the crew to get him out of the car wreck. Someone handed him a Healing Potion, and he reached for his Feelers Anonymous (FA) chip. Bracing for the feelings that would come, he gulped it down - one of the perks of his job as a crash test dummy - and felt his bones realligning into the right place. Meanwhile he began writing down his notes on this test, although he doubted that it would add to the sensor readouts.

---

At home, he reflected on his private task at hand. It was time to start writing The Letter.

"Dear FOAL," he started, citing the nickname "Face on a Lover" his classmate that had turned into a Succubus had gained.

Unsure how to continue, he reflected. On the first Christmas after The Change, he had been bitten by something that looked like a rabid yrrb, and when he checked his Status afterwards, he had found that he had been cursed. What this curse entailed became clear when he visited his family: tears melted away his flesh like acid. So, his isolation deepened. As a joke, he got himself a cap with the words "Once bitten and twice shy" stitched on. Nobody got the meaning.

After graduating and getting his current job, he wagered his options. The curse wasn't life-threatening, so he'd have to pay for the removal himself. Then he found a ritual that could make his body water- (and therefore tear-)repellant, thus circumventing the curse. It was rather complicated, but at the core of it was one fairly easy task: over the twelve days of christmas, his heart had to be guarded by someone else.

He already had someone for that job. He had met Heidi at Feelers Anonymous. She was a nymphomaniac goth girl Changed into a Nachzehrer, and court-ordered to attend after

another

attempt to overdose on health potions. He sought counselling on his moderately unusual reaction to them - he would

happily

stop using them, thus keeping his feelings away, but they were part of his job for now.

Then, on the way to the post office, he crossed paths with FOAL. Problem with people that got a race-induced high charisma? "I keep my distance, but you still catch my eye." He sent his heart not to the intended person.

---

"Tell me, baby, do you recognise me? Well, it′s been a year, it doesn't surprise me," Wendell started his letter. "Happy Christmas, I wrapped it up and sent it with a note saying, 'I love you', I meant it. Now I know what a fool I've been, but if you kissed me now, I know you′d fool me again."

---

Thus the reason for the letter. Wendell couldn't risk to face her again. And what a struggle it had been to get his heart back. Asking her had been no option, for obvious reasons.

He had to go full detective mode, even use disguises and one time he had to cram himself into several compartments in a cupboard. Good thing he had warned Heidi each time beforehand, and she could sneak him out piece by piece and reassemble him.

Turned out, she had played secret santa with his heart - turned it into a candle holder and given it away.

---

"A crowded room, friends with tired eyes." That's where he finally found his heart.

"I′m hiding from you and your soul of ice. My God, I thought you were someone to rely on. Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on." Yes, she had really "tested" the curse.

"A face on a lover with a fire in his heart." The candle holder thing.

"A man undercover, but you tore me apart." The detective thing.

"Now I've found a real love, you′ll never fool me again." Convincing Heidi to guard his heart had brought them together. Given, it was more an arrangement than a romantic marriage, but they had found that working together was better than being undead alone.

"Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, you gave it away. This year, to save me from tears I'll give it to someone special.

"WHAM," he finished his letter.