Joe called Mary Lou on her cell phone to let her know that the house was now void of all his friends and male relatives. The Barbecue and Power Tool party had ended. She was on her way home from a Linens and Lingerie shower her aunt Peggy had thrown for her.
"Just wait until I show you what Martha Mitchell gave me, Joe. You will just love it." "If it's something I'll see your lush, round curves half naked in, baby, it will be perfect. Just wait until YOU see what your Uncle Billy Ray gave me." Joe's voice was full of glee.
"Darlin' the only power tool you've got that I'm interested in is attached to your body." Mary Lou giggled as she hung up, promising to be at the house in the next 20 minutes.
Their wedding was three days away. If it hadn't been for their small town Alabama lives and their families, they'd already be living together, but both families disapproved, so the big church wedding was planned.
Joe stood at the front window watching for Mary Lou as she drove up in her two seat, bright red Miata. He grinned as he positioned himself just by the front door and waited for her to enter. When she opened the door she found him standing there, wearing nothing but a smile, a barbecue apron that said "Chili Lovers- Some Like It Hot" and had chili peppers engaged in various sexual positions, and a matching barbecue mitt. The mitt was NOT on his hand. Instead it was protruding lewdly from beneath the apron. Mary Lou gasped, then giggled as he worked the tongs in one hand, acting as pinchers, and waved the spatula in the other at the screwing peppers.
"So, baby, which position do you want to try first?" "You nut! I have to get all these bags unloaded before it starts raining and you're standing there naked!" "But I'm not naked. See, I'm clothed, no one can see my little soldier." He hunched his hips forward, fucking at air and followed her into the den as she sat the handful of gift bags she was carrying on the coffee table.
One of the bags fell over, its contents spilling on the floor. When she bent to pick it up, he swatted her denim covered behind with the spatula.
"Ow!" She jumped up, turning to face him, rubbing her bottom. "You ass. That hurt." "No, it didn't hurt, hon, it was just a little tenderizing." He made another lewd gesture with the mitt. Mary Lou caught him off guard and grabbed the tongs out of his left hand.
"Oh yeah? Maybe I need to do a little tenderizing of my own." She held the tongs out, lobster-claw style, reaching for his mitt-covered manhood.
"Stop that. You'll injure something." He backed away from her. "Come here, baby, and let me check out that bratwurst. I need to be sure it's done." She took a step toward him.
"Done? Ha! Its not even near done, but its going to be just as soon as I get you out of those jeans. Do you want to remove them willingly, or shall I break out the new Ginsu knives and kitchen shears?"
Joe made a lunge for Mary Lou, but she was able to evade him. Squealing, she sprinted around the coffee table and headed for the door, but Joe was too quick for her. He caught her by a belt loop, having the advantage of being barefoot vs. her in heels, and dragged her back into the room. He wrapped his arms around her waist as he rubbed himself against her ass.
"Come on, baby, taste my sausage. I promise its the best you'll ever eat." He buried his head against her neck and nibbled at just that perfect spot that always melted her knees and her resolve, and groaned aloud as she pressed back against him.