Sex is hungry work.
The easy answer is to nip to the fridge and grab a pot of yogurt to spoon over each other but there is nothing as restorative home cooking. And why get dressed? Almost everything is more fun to do when you are doing it naked.
I am assuming that the urge to cook naked will come upon you when you are already naked; in search of an inter-course snack so to speak. Naked cookery has a place in every relationship but is best in the down time between bouts of sex. If you start the evening naked at the stove you are going to burn your dinner.
Most naked cooks are women. First of all, I have never met a man who would willingly put his naked cock anywhere near a gas burner. Secondly, men like to watch women doing things naked that are usually done clothed. Last, there is an advantage to looking tantalizing while he is recovering his strength. He isn't going to roll over and fall asleep when there is a naked woman whipping something nearby. Rested and fed, he will be ready to go again.
The kitchen is perhaps the most underused room in most houses when it comes to sexual encounters. This is a shame, as kitchens are packed with erotic enhancers; sweet sticky jams, ice cubes, olive oil. The gentle burning sensation of a hot chili rubbed over a nipple lasts for hours. (You can tone down the sting by dabbing with a little Japanese sweet rice vinegar.) And don't forget the utility drawer; twist ties, wooden spoons, string, duct tape...
For some men, the very idea of a woman cooking naked in the house is enough to keep them aroused and content to stay in bed, even if they can't see her. But watching is half the fun. If you plan to do a lot of naked cooking, invest in a sofa for the kitchen or move to an open-plan house.
How naked are you going to be?
Total nudity is terrific for building body confidence. That said, a few accessories will add some spice. My personal preference is bare but for a pair of navy blue, patent leather stilettos that I keep in the kitchen as a daily reminder of some very tasty meals.Lingerie is generally incompatible with food preparation. It's one thing to lick a bit of maple syrup off a naked hip but it's pretty revolting to suck it out of the side strings of a thong. Frilly and dangly bits get in the way, garter belt snaps get hot, and there is the obvious problem of flammability. If you feel you must wear something consider an apron.
There are two basic types of apron, the waist and the bib. A waist apron can look particularly charming tied high above a well toned ass. Add high heels for a subtle tip of the pelvis. The obvious source for a waist apron is a uniform supplier that caters to maids and waitresses but have a poke around vintage clothing stores for something special. Waist aprons were popular until the 1960s and can be found in satin or taffeta for formal entertaining and cheerful prints for everyday wear. You can pick them for pennies as no one seems to know what to do with them these days. Now you do.
The bib apron is the one most people are familiar with. Look for one that is small enough around to leave your bottom exposed at the back and narrow enough up top so that at least the outer third of each breast remains uncovered.
Bib aprons are a great choice for male naked cooks as well and come in rougher fabrics like canvas and denim. The strap around the neck makes shoulders appear wider and the bow at the back turns the back of the thighs into a Christmas present. Tie it tight enough to encourage a little tent in front for dessert.
One more note on personal presentation, get waxed. There is nothing less appetizing than an errant pubic hair in the hollandaise sauce.
What to cook?
Never cook bacon naked, no matter how much you want it.
Whatever you choose to cook it should be light and it has to be fast. Don't make anything that produces crumbs if you plan to take the dish back to the bedroom Sweet things are good for energy levels, protein is good for stamina.
Some of the classic aphrodisiac foods will work while others simply don't. It is difficult to keep chocolate melted in the bedroom and the sterno for the fondue pot poses a fire hazard. Shucking oysters is always messy even if the mesh glove is a little bit kinky. And it's almost a shame to eat lobster naked, wasting all that ripping and tearing, which is such a nice prelude to ripping and tearing your clothes off later. Generally, anything that requires two hands to eat will complicate your evening. You should aspire to keep one hand free.
