When she awoke at 3am, she was not surprised to find him occupying all her thoughts already. He'd been in her dreams only moments before, though she could not recall the details. He'd been in her mind for days now, taking up all her imaginings, affecting her concentration at work, affecting the amount of attention her family received.
She fought with him as much or more than the times when they were civil to each other. There had never been anyone in her life before who spoke to her in the manner he did. He was blunt, painfully so, and he didn't accept her feeble excuses for any behavior he did not judge to be totally honest. It angered her so when he dug to her very core and brought to light feelings and thoughts she'd kept hidden from herself for years.
But in her anger, she couldn't understand how she felt such an attraction, a drawing. It was not a physical attraction - how could it be when they'd not even met in person yet? It wasn't a sexual attraction - albeit being laid open naked and vulnerable the way he did was highly arousing to her. It was deeper, like gravity, like a moth to a flame, and she already felt the burning.
She fought verbally, she attempted to fight emotionally but that was quickly a losing battle, and she fiercely resisted all his invitations to come to him. Not for the normal reasons one might expect, not to avoid cheating on her husband because they'd always enjoyed a somewhat open marriage. She resisted because she was terrified of being swallowed up by him and disappearing altogether.
She'd been around the block long enough to know what a power exchange was and she'd been involved (to a small degree) that way before, knowing the dominant partner only had the power that was given to him by the submissive partner. If the sub said "no", the game was over. But she could not say no to him. She felt under a spell of a kind she did not understand. Captured, taken, overwhelmed. And most disturbing, such a large part of her reveled in it and wanted more!
A time was rapidly approaching when he would issue his invitation again and she would be all out of excuses and have to face her fear. She drifted back into uneasy sleep, surprising herself by wishing that day would come soon.
A week later, at seven in the evening, she found herself driving downtown towards the Westin. He'd flown into town that afternoon, told her to be there that night and to expect to spend the long Labor Day weekend in his company. She'd felt like a deer in the headlights, her eyes darting to and fro in near-panic, knowing there was no way out.
Her mouth was dry and her hands shook with expectation as she entered the bar where they were to meet. She was dressed very casually, a last defiant act, knowing that he was accustomed to the finer things in life. The casual, colorful, flouncy sundress stood out against the corporate suits and the basic "little black dresses". Maybe it was grasping at her last straw of autonomy because even then, before laying eyes on him, she felt his presence nearby.
The hostess saw her standing alone surveying the room and asked, "Are you meeting someone?"
She jumped at the unexpected intrusion into her thoughts and stammered, "Uh, yes."
"I believe your gentleman is right over here. If you'll follow me….?"
Kim nodded and made her feet obey.
The woman led her through a small maze of tables and diners to a smaller room off to the left side. No wonder she'd not been able to spot him before. She wondered how much more he'd had to pay for this extra privacy.
When he saw her approaching, he rose with good manners and pulled out the chair to his right and then just watched her.
Kim's eyes met his and she suddenly feared fainting. Her knees turned to rubber and chills ran the length of her spine. The way he looked at her - looked INTO her - was a physical sensation. She knew what a tin can felt like when it first encountered the can opener.
"Kim," he nodded cordially as she took the chair he offered.
"Hello Scott," she said, wishing it had not come out so meekly.
He asked her a couple of questions about what she liked to eat, then ordered for them both, something she'd not experienced before. And he ordered a bottle of wine. She'd never liked wine but she sipped it politely, figured she could slake her thirst on the ice water, but she discovered that apparently the more expensive the wine, the better it tasted. It wasn't half-bad.
They made small talk while they waited and throughout the meal. Kim was pleased to find that he seemed to have a completely different personality than she'd previously expected, although he could not hide the fact that he was used to being the one in control. He was genuinely warm and very observant of who she was and what she thought. He listened attentively, he spoke with intelligence and authority and the more she listened, the more she wanted to hear. She did not realize that she sat there wide-eyed, rapt. The wine had taken off the edges of any fear or uneasiness she'd felt, it calmed her and opened her.
"Let's walk a bit," he suggested after paying the bill. "The air will feel nice."
Kim agreed. She'd felt herself getting warmer all along, not recognizing it as an effect of the alcohol. Scott could see the tiny beads of perspiration on her forehead.
They walked through the manicured grounds of the hotel's gardens until Kim felt herself completely lost. The wine had dulled her senses from their usual sharpness and had made her giggly. She forgot how many glasses she'd had.
Scott led them in a circular path, holding her hand now, noticing that, although she was not quite drunk, she was a little unsteady on her feet. They approached the pool and Kim squealed with delight.
"It's so hot!" she said, "We should just jump right in there and cool off!"
He was quite warm himself, feeling sweat trickle down the curve of his back every now and then, but he had other ideas.
"No, our room will be cool and I'll have them bring us up another bottle of wine."
With a resigned frown, she allowed him to lead her on past the pool as she watched wistfully over her shoulder. "All right."
Their "room" as he'd called it was huge. A suite, larger and more opulent than she'd ever had in a hotel. Her idea of a hotel room was two double beds and a cheap TV. While she went to the bathroom, the wine arrived and he poured them both another glass.
It was icy and felt so good after their walk. She quickly downed the first one and he refilled it.
"I have to stop drinking," she mused to herself aloud. Her eyes had gone half-lidded and her speech was thickening.
"I'll tell you when you should stop drinking," Scott said.
Was it the wine or was there a harsher quality to his voice? More unquestioned authority? The sound brought tiny explosions in the deepest pit of her stomach and a tiny whimper from her throat. It was that Pavlovian response that she had thought she'd conquered long ago.
It was not lost on Scott, though he did not comment.
Kim fought the urge to answer "yes Sir".
He moved closer to her on the sofa and reached up to stroke her cheek. The scent of heat was strong between them, musky, earthy, natural. Her hair was damp and he stroked wet tendrils away from her face.
"I want you, Kim," he whispered in a tone that resonated through her cells. "I want to take you and make you feel things you've never felt before."
The words seemed almost menacing to her and she felt a thrill of danger. The adrenaline release made the minute hairs stand up on her arms and the back of her neck.
She didn't know how to reply and the mixture of fear and sheer little-girl innocence on her face inflamed him. He wanted her now, roughly, forcefully, and letting go of himself to do that was something he had to guard against. At least for now.
Perhaps she'd had enough to drink, so he took the crystal from her hand and sat it on the table before them. When he turned back to her, he suddenly grabbed the nape of her neck with one strong hand and crushed his lips against hers.
Another sound from her throat, part whimper, part moan, but there was no resistance. Her lips parted eagerly for his tongue and he tasted the wine on her.