The Awaening

Last night, I was bound, blindfolded and fucked senseless.

Last night, I sucked Master's cock in front of a room full of people. Twice.

Last night, I experienced mind-blowing pleasure like never before, over and over. At one point, I couldn't stop cumming.

Last night, I gave myself over to Master, body and mind, trusting him to take care of me and knowing that it meant I would do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted.

Today, I wish I could do it all again. And more.

I am Master's. I know it. He knows it. I occasionally try to struggle against it but truth is hard to deny. Even in my dreams he fucks me hard, bites my nipples, whips me and makes me his. I wake happy.

I really did not expect for all of this to happen. I know my inclinations but I have fought them for a long time. I indulged them ever so briefly before, but the experience was not satisfying because my then partner-in-crime was not really a Dom, though I think he wished he was. Meeting Master in person that first time, sitting with him in his truck, I sensed a palpable difference. It was in the way he spoke - the quiet confidence - and it was in the way he lazily rested his wrists over the steering wheel. It was also in the certainty of his very blue eyes as he told me that he felt I was going to be his and that he knew that this was what I had been looking for. I didn't feel his same assurance, but then I was also shocked at my own behavior...meeting a man I barely knew and then, when he asked to kiss me, I acquiesced not realizing that mere seconds later his kiss would turn me into a molten cum-soaked jello-like mass who spread her legs the moment his hand moved to the waistband of her pants.

I am Master's slut. I am Master's whore. I will do whatever Master wants me to do.

He told me after he knew that if he wanted to I would have let him fuck me in the parking lot where we met, despite the fact it was the middle of the day. He's right, too; I would have. The pleasure of being touched the way he touched me, the dominance I felt in him had me rather hypnotized. My body was also screamingly hungry because it had been months since I had been properly fucked by anyone and, as Master now knows all too well, I have a sex drive that is almost (but only almost) insatiable. Master has determined it takes about eight hours of fucking to wear me out, before I plead for rest.

Sometimes I long for sleep earlier, but he likes to push me, and I find later I am always happy that he did.

I find it very hard to say "no" to Master, and I find even more often that I do not wish to. He says I am a natural sub. I am seeing more and more that he is right. I never really truly knew this part of myself, and I struggle with it at times, even now. But that is the thinking part of me, the part that is too active for too much of the day and too much of the week. All of my day is filled with decisions and actions, dealing with one thing after another; I am responsible for so many things, so many people, that it can be wearing.

But when I am with Master, it is like taking a deep, calming breath yet at the same time the excitement of being with him makes me quiver. The decisions are his; he will consult me, and respects me, but we both know that he is in charge. Once the blindfold is on, there is only this: only my body in his hands, clenched around his cock, mouth open and willing. There is only his body, his cock. There is only the purple pleasure of O,o, o and again. I often feel like I am almost flying...or I float in a pool of pleasure and my mind thinks of nothing but of pleasing him. Sometimes he'll ask me questions and it's hard to think, hard to answer. I try, but it is as if nothing else exists.

I wish I could spend more time with Master, though the commitments of my everyday life make that challenging. I love being bound and blindfolded more than I can say. I knew I liked being bound for some time, but I never realized that I loved it this much. Years ago, when I was kid, I would often go to sleep with my wrists crossed, wistfully wishing they were bound. I never told anyone about it though, since I recognized that others would think it an odd proclivity. Now, as an adult, I cannot get enough. When I am not with Master, I crave the leather at my wrists and ankles. When I masturbate, I often blindfold myself now...it heightens my awareness of everything else and stops me from being distracted by trivialities of my day...though I always miss him when I do. Now is that I know I am in Master's care, and I truly believe that he would never hurt me or let others hurt me; I feel so very safe when bound and blindfolded. He has made clear that he will push my limitations time and time again...and he has done so, time and time again...but the experiences which follow are powerful and strangely liberating.

Last week, he spanked me over his lap. Hard. I loved it. I craved it again the very next day and every day since then. Pain and pleasure are an enticing combination. The thought of being spanked like that again makes me want to spread my legs right now...I can feel my cunt's wetness already...

The co-ed bathhouse he takes me to...full of its dark corners and strangers...is both a scary and erotic place to be. I like being in Master's arms, hearing another couple in bliss...though it does not happen as often as I would like. I think it is more often that others hear us...or rather...me...since it is I who screams in pleasure and moans in pain and begs for Master to fuck me hard, to fuck his slut, to take me and do whatever he wishes with me. I feel most scared and most alive when he leads me down dark hallways and I don't know what we might find or what he might do to me along the way.

There was a time that Master sat me on a leather couch there, kissed me and as others filed quietly into the room, he spread my soft, pale thighs and fingered me. He tells me next time, when the timing is right, he'll fuck me there, make me cum in front of strangers and show me off. The prospect both scares and excites me, but I know afterward I will crave doing it again and again.

I don't know where this path will lead me. This is all still very new to me, and I am still trying to work through the fact that I can be a strong individual in my everyday life, and yet so very submissive sexually. I have discovered that the best pleasure comes when I give myself over to him...when I hold back we both know it, and neither of us is really satisfied. I look forward to the things we will try even though I suspect some of them will make me breathless with anxiety at the mere thought.

I am Master's slut. I am Master's whore. I will do whatever Master wants me to do.