"It seems very quiet this morning," Mimas, the lead centaur and chief of Olympian guards, said as he clopped forward on the front lawn of Zeus and Hera's palace. Gripping his spear tightly in his hands, he looked out warily at the gorgeous view from the citadel and carefully studied the vista for any signs of trouble. The serene peaks of Mount Olympus were clearly visible in the distance, glowing brightly in a soft pink and purple light as the morning sun just began to rise over the horizon. At long last the dreaded and anticipated Solstice dawn was finally here. Despite a gnawing feeling of dread growing in his stomach, everything still looked calm, but the serenity of the scene did nothing to calm his nerves. Shaking his head, he turned to his assistant and added "Almost too quiet."
"It is" sighed Chiron, his young centaur lieutenant replied as he lifted his back hoof and lazily scratched his stomach. "With Hera and the Nymphs away at the Grace's party, and Zeus still in bed with strict instructions to not disturb, this has to be the dullest Solstice morning I can ever remember."
"Yes..., but dull can be good sometimes Chiron," Mimas said as he smiled knowingly at his young officer. Youth is so bold sometimes, dumb but always bold. Sighing loudly, he continued "Frankly I am enjoying the peace, and I would suggest you do as well. Trouble is coming, so we should enjoy the quiet times while we can."
"About that..." Chiron asked. "You and the other commanders seem so positive that there is going to be a war, but I am not sure you are right. Lords of Chaos knows that Zeus has worked himself up into a frenzy for months in preparation for some unnamed threat supposedly to take place on the solstice. But as you can see the Solstice is here and all I see is... nothing!" Staring himself out onto the blissfully serene dawn he added "Personally I think all of this war fever has been a mirage; a fever brought on by one too many Ambrosias by Lord Zeus."
"Don't be sacrilegious Soldier!" Mimas barked.
"I'm not, I'm not! I misspoke," Chiron quickly added. "But I cannot help but be disappointed that it all was such a ruse. I was very charged up about the prospect of finally teaching those Egyptian fuckers a lesson and hate to think I have missed my chance. I have wanted to spill their blood ever since they were such arrogant motherfuckers at the state dinner." Unsheathing his sword, he held it up in front of his face and slashed at the air. "I for one wouldn't mind a little bit of action right now. My steel thirsts for the taste of one of those Bird worshippers blood. They fucking deserve being taken down a peg or two don't you think?"
"Well...," Mimas replied as he stroked his long gray beard and chuckled. "You are young, and the young are always overly romantic about war. You really do not understand what battle is like yet, but you will. Trust me, once you have tasted the sour vintage of war, you will not be in such a hurry to drink from that cup again."
"Captain Mimas, if you forgive my saying this, but I think you have forgotten what it is like to be young. I have read of your exploits in the great battle between the Olympians and the Titans and was most impressed. You and the other great Centaur heroes were a big reason Zeus was able to claim his throne."
Blushing at the compliment, Mimas started to speak before being interrupted by his young friend. "But you see, you had your taste of glory by the time you were my age and now you can relax and enjoy the memories of your exploits in your golden years. But I am still young! When do I get my chance to fulfill my destiny? When can I earn the accolades and honor that you and the other older Centaurs won when you were my age? When can..."
Chuckling at the foolishness of youth, Mimas opened his mouth to admonish his young assistant before he froze and lifted his hand for silence. Placing his hand on Chiron's shoulder he suddenly sniffed the air and said, "Quiet! Do you smell that?"
"Smell what?"
Sniffing the air again, Captain Mimas's grin quickly dropped and a ferocious scowl formed on his face. He knew that smell well; it was the terrible stench of burning human flesh and smoldering marble and plaster. It was the whiff of war, the fragrance of death, and scanning the horizon he prayed that he would not see what his nose told him he was sure to find. Peering down the slope of Mount Olympus towards one the multiple tiny villages in the foothills, his stomach dropped as he saw thick black smoke rising into the crisp cold air.
"Look! Down there in the village!"
Turning to look, suddenly Chiron's eyes grew wide and he screamed "Incoming!"
Before they were able to prepare, both were thrown to the ground by the force of the blast that shot out from the center of the courtyard. Struggling to rise to his feet and assess what had just happened, Mimas gasped. His eyes were white with terror as he watched another enormous ball of fire slam into one of the multiple fountains in the gardens and explode into a shower of glowing red and orange sparks. Instantly knowing what this all meant, he screamed at the top of his lungs "War! War has come! Chiron, sound the alarm! Battle Stations!"
As Chiron galloped off to the barracks to call the rest of the Centaurs into action, he was met by the entire regiment rushing out to investigate the noise of the unexpected explosion. Gathering onto the front lawn, weapons were quickly distributed as the slow trickle of fireballs now increased to a steady downpour. With enormous explosions erupting all around them, one of the Centaurs yelled out "What in the fuck is going on Chiron! What fool would attack Olympus!"
"I do not know, but, gather your weapons and follow me. Captain Mimas has sounded the battle stations."
"Should we wake Lord Zeus?"
"Do you want to be the one to violate his order not to be disturbed?"
Shaking his head violently no, the private joined the rest of the regiment now stampeding down the hill towards the fire and the smoke. As they reached the gardens on the front lawn, all came to an abrupt halt. Looking on in horror, they watched as an enormous black and purple cloud began to rush up the slopes and head straight for their position.
Inside the protective mist, the Ibis headed God, Thoth, nervously squawked, "Lord Ammon Ra, I beg you to turn back before it is too late. We are way too deep into enemy territory to continue and this cloud will not protect us against Zeus' thunderbolts."
"Coward! All around me are nothing but fucking cowards," Ammon Ra screeched back as he focused his sight on Zeus's palace, his eyes focused on their target with a steely determination. "I must have been drunk when I agreed to give my daughter Sekhmet to you in marriage."
Clad in his full armor of diamonds and rubies and piloting his war chariot pulled by giant crocodiles, Ammon Ra was a truly dazzling sight. Gloriously arrayed in full armor, his noble hawk head was fixated onto the summit of Olympus as the sunlight flashed on the pure silver helmet covering his crown. Beside him, in his own chariot, and angrily looking at his father-in-law who seemed to have gone quite mad; Thoth bit his tongue. It was obvious that nothing was going to dissuade Ammon Ra from his plans for the ultimate humiliation and revenge on the house of Zeus and he could only hope that they would survive the day.
With his black feathers bristling in fury, Ammon Ra continued to speak to his son-in-law. "I made a sacred vow to teach that fucker, Zeus, a lesson, and we will not leave until that lesson has been applied. I will not leave Mount Olympus until we have taken his sacred altar basin for use as a toilet in my stables!" Chuckling to himself at the thought, he continued, "That will be a fitting use for such an object. No longer will it contain the flames of devotion to Zeus, but will be a proper receptacle for my morning piss after my daily ride! No Thoth, there is no argument. I am on a mission."
Frowning through his prodigious black beak he looked over and glowered at his son-in-law. "Plus I have to ask..., Have you no pride Thoth! That fucker knocked up your wife and she has given birth to his son! Does that not piss you off? How can you even be a real man knowing that your wife, my beloved daughter, was filled with the seed of this goat fucker while you took her to your bed!"
Growling in bitter anger, Thoth said nothing in response to Ammon Ra's cruel but accurate comment. Seething silently, he whipped his own crocodiles as they raced up the hill. He was furious at Zeus of course, but what they were doing to avenge his crime was unprecedented and highly dangerous. No God before had ever attacked another deity in their own territory. Here in Greece, they were at a huge disadvantage since, despite being divine, the Egyptian Gods powers were greatly diminished outside of Egypt. Looking over at Ammon Ra charging blindly in a rage towards the palace, his feathers bristled in both terror and anger. Despite the righteous wrath he harbored towards the Greeks, he felt that engaging in a suicide mission was not the proper channel for revenge.