Of Two Minds

Pacing like a caged lion, her thoughts twisted in her head. She had done wrong and she knew it.

His eyes never left her. He let her walk. He let her work the details over in her mind. He could very easily stand up take her by the wrist and administer the punishment she so richly deserved, but he would not. He would sooner let her walk out of his life than allow the luxury of not committing herself to the spanking she deserved.

Back and forth, her path became a worn mark in the carpet. She could feel his eyes on her. She could feel their weight bare down on her almost as fiercely as the guilt that ached in her belly. She knew better than that didn't she? What had made her do it? Was she really this intent on testing him? Damn. There he sat, true to his word. The hard backed chair looked almost as daunting as his hand. She knew their feel from the many times they had made love. Could those hands also deliver the paddling he had promised her when she had confessed?

Her resolve was breaking. He could see it. She knew she was in trouble and she knew he was right. He had promised her in the beginning that if she were to break the rules he would discipline her in a way that would leave her remembering the lesson for days. He flexed his fingers and cracked his knuckles. The effect upon her was unmistakable as she stopped her pacing and looked fiercely at him. But he watched as her look softened and became the look of shame and regret. He knew she wanted to apologize and run into his arms and beg for forgiveness.

What if she were to run to him and beg him for forgiveness? Surely he wouldn't spank me if I did that, would he? The look in his eyes confirmed her darkest fears. He was intent, and she knew she would have to face it or lose him. Head hung low, she began to march towards him, each agonizing step closer increasing the level of terror in her belly ten fold. She hoped his gaze would grow lighter as she approached, but the look of resolve never faltered from his eyes. Reaching his side, she couldn't bare to look at him for fear she might run as fast as her legs would carry her.

How she quivered. He could see her terror, and although he didn't like scaring her, he knew that this was necessary for her to feel in order to make the lesson stick. Her scolding hours earlier had reduced her to tears, this he thought would shake her to her bones. Still, when she had vehemently refused to bend over his knee when told to, she had turned what would have been a quick paddling into a very real lesson she would not soon forget.

"You understand the problem little girl?"

"yes sir." She said in a diminutive voice.

"Are you ready to face the consequences?" The question shot through her like a bullet.

Barely a whisper, "yes sir" she said. "Your overdressed then little girl"

Shocked and more than a little alarmed, her eyes shot to his. Did he really mean for her to undress herself. Wouldn't he at least take that responsibility from her? Couldn't he make this just a little bit easier? She knew the answer. He was a man of his word and when he told her it would be worse if she didn't get over his knee those many hours earlier, he was not joking. The first and second button of her Levi's released cautiously by her quivering fingers. However as she found one after the next, she discovered that she could in fact take them down and kick them off. The look of defiance returned to her face and she sought his eyes once again. The triumph was short lived though. His eyes were not impressed.

"You may have behaved like a little girl and you may be punished like a little girl, but you will NOT be dressed as a little girl. UNDRESS." He could feel the strength in his voice and knew that the shock value alone would be enough to wipe that smug look from her face. He knew that she had expected to only have to remove her pants and he would take care of the rest. He was going to teach her differently. IF she wanted to defy him, then he would show her what that meant.

She could feel the protest beginning to rise in her voice. Naked? He was going to spank her naked? NO....She would not do that, but even as she heard that voice screaming in her head, she realized that the last time she had refused him, it had wound her up in even more trouble. Would she do that again. She tried to bury the inner voice, and comply with his orders even as the terror swam in her. First her shirt, then her sox, then her bra; she stood before him in only her panties and hoped it would be enough.

The feeling was so strange. She had been naked in front of him so many times before. He had caressed, kissed, held, loved and touched every part of her body inside and out one way or another in the time that she had known him, but this was different. She was exposing herself to his scrutiny for the first time, but more than that, she was opening herself up to his authority. She knew that her choice to stand in front of him now meant that she would be his. She was giving herself to him to love, honor, cherish, hold and when necessary, discipline. A tear began to form a trail down her cheek.

Her body was magnificent and he had never tired of looking at it before. He could see how she trembled and smiled inwardly with some satisfaction at the place he found himself now. He had promised her this if she were to ever disobey him, now he was going to have to prove himself...and prove himself he would. He gestured for her to take her place at the right of his long thick legs and watched with an expectant eye as she slowly made her way to the thigh she was going to bend over.

"You understand why I'm doing this don't you little girl?"

"Yes sir" she said with a whisper

"If that is true then push your panties to your knees and take your place over my lap."

Again shock took her by surprise. Couldn't he do something? Why did she have to do it all. Couldn't he just pull her across his lap kicking and screaming and spank her like a naughty girl? Agony built inside of her. But she realized quickly that she wasn't a little girl. She wasn't a child. He was going to spank her like one, but he was going to treat her every bit like the adult who is responsible for her choices. The fear cresting inside of her, she did as she was told and pushed her panties down, and crossed his lap like the good little girl she wanted him to think of her as again.

She was light, vulnerable and bare across his lap. He stroked her head once, twice and then a third time. Gently scolding her and telling her why he was going to do what he told her he would. He instructed her to hold on and to be brave, but that it was going to hurt and it was ok to cry.

She could already feel the panic, fear, and regret in her body threatening to reduce her to sobs any second.

His hands were soft for a few more moments, but then turned hard. He slid one hand from her head and neck down to her hip and pulled her hips tight across his lap. He lifted his one thigh up so her head was effectively lower than her bottom, and he placed that one large hard hand on her bottom.

It was so hard, and so heavy she gasped with the realization that he was going to spank her and that he had the strength to leave an impression that would last a long long time. Not only that, but the feeling of her bottom being higher than her head left her with a very real sense of vulnerability.

He opened her thighs for her and ordered her up on her tip toes. He watched as she responded with the quickness of a frightened deer. He caressed her thigh a while longer and touched her bottom. He continued to scold her softly in a way that penetrated to her very core. She felt the very real sense of guilt and anguish. She had let him down. She had let this man who loved her so completely, down. The realization hit, this man did not spank her as a means of revenge. He was going to spank her because he loved her.

And then it began.