i thought at first that i was in for an exciting new idea of hers. i was. Just not at all like i thought. Let me give a little bit of backstory first. my Wife and i are somewhat in what is known as a "Female Led Relationship". i've read about varying degrees of relationships like ours. Some are light and playful, a matter of it being convenient for the guy, and some have the wife in charge of most everything, with her as the benefactor. Others still, have a wife who might as well be a pimp. For us, my Wife dictates how everything will be when she chooses to. She is clearly in control of anything She wants to be, and i answer to Her completely. It wasn't always like this, in fact, we just recently decided to make it more real. But it turns out that She likes to have control. And me? i need it.
i had really made Her angry the week before, though most people would tell me that i had a reason to at the very least push the issue until it was resolved. What happened is irrelevant, but it's important to make the point that anyone i can think of would have probably set up a polygraph appointment for their wives. That's one of the distinctions for us. These are the things i beg Her for, these distinctions that trample and throw out my personal rights. In our relationship i could come home, see that 500 dollars was spent that day, ask what happened, and be told that She paid for a date for me with Her dildo, and that i can start thinking of ways to thank Her, starting with me reimbursing Her 500 bucks.
i could walk in our door unexpectedly, catch Her on FaceTime with a guy, and She could say to me, "No, I'm talking to a girlfriend." And i, even having caught a glimpse of him, could, as carefully and politely as humanly possible, say, "But i saw a guy."
To which she could absolutely and coldly say, "Fuck, um, uh, whatever, it wasn't. Fuck, go to bed. I don't want you up late". At 8:30pm. When i don't have to work the next day. Getting the idea yet?
So, on this night She comes down the stairs with Her black leather riding crop, the one with a hand on the end. This isn't something She brings into play very often at all. She also happens to have Her 8 inch black rubber dick in Her other hand, though by the end of the night, she would enforce the concept that it was mine. Seeing Her haughty look, Her absolute confidence, and knowing Her stunning ability, more a superpower really, to be so mentally masochistic, i was instantly consumed by an insatiable lust to lick Her, any part of Her. i always get more and more desperate to be Her amusement the more She turns me on. By this point i literally wanted Her to take out any and all frustration on me. It had been building up for a couple days now.
She had mercilessly teased me the past couple of days without me cumming. The first night She woke me up at 3:15am to make use of my fingers inside Her while She rubbed Her clit. She shuddered in the throws of Her climax, and then She mashed Her fingers into my face and made me suck mine clean. i asked if i could cum. She laughed, said no, and rolled over and went to sleep. i thanked Her for owning me. She had essentially awoken me from sleep to be Her dildo, a minor example of Her ability of mental mind fuckery. The next day was an onslaught of verbal destruction throughout the day, which always gets my full 5 inches of attention. Still though, no cumming.
Had we not just had this huge blowout, i would have turned into a real pain in the ass by this point. But we were both still sensitive and it had hit me hard enough to take away all desire for a female led relationship. Being that things were so raw, i didn't push the issue. She approached me with absolute authority and spoke.
"I want you to go wait in the shed for me. Take this crop and dildo and go." Very to the point, almost no emotion, an oddly soul-piercing tone. i was SO ready for what was now certain to be a special time, i couldn't wait. But still, She was so . . . almost . . . disconnected that i couldn't gauge Her. i had to seek clarification.
"Just go sit? And wait?" i meekly asked.
Again, stoic in Her response; "Go. Now." i began getting hopeful that this disconnected tone would translate to disconnected concern, and She might not hold back in blunt and rude disregard, i know for sure that that is my krypnonite, more than a sexy woman is to a man that wants to fuck like a man.
i went to the shed and sat in my chair. The shed is finished and insulated, much more like a regular room than a shed. i sat there, looking at the black riding crop that symbolized Her ownership of me. i glanced over at Her black dildo, it's symbolization was clear. Like the crop, it too was a tool of authority, but it symbolized more than Her ownership - it represented Her right to toy with my very psyche - to turn me into Her puppet clown. i made it a point to not touch anything. The worst thing for this type of relationship - the most volatile thing, for me, is inventing humiliating acts for myself. i can't fully explain it, but i just can't live like that. All the degradation, all the desire to be absolutely fucked over that i embrace so deeply - however a "normal" person would view those things as detrimental, THAT'S how i view inventing cruelty for myself. But i digress. i left them alone and waited patiently.
Some time went by, and i thought too much had passed. Was She teasing me? It didn't seem like it, based on Her tone. It seemed like it was taking far too long. i went for the house, ready to knock to be let in. i thought i'd grab a smoke. i got to the sliding glass door and She was at the table, going through Her purse. i had caught her off guard, of this i'm certain. She stared at me angrily through the door. i was genuinely scared a little. The feeling of actually fearing my five foot two wife was intoxicating. And new. i liked it. She unlocked the door and opened it.
"What the fuck are you doing? I told you to wait in the shed." She asked flatly. Had i imagined Her teeth gritted while asking me that? It was hard to tell.
"i thought i'd grab a smoke. You were taking a while. i was going to knock." With each thing i said i noticed i was back peddling.
