Nancy Remembers

"Heavens!" she exclaimed, as she scanned through her email. "Could it be?" she questioned not daring to think if she hated it, loved it or what, she just stared at the subject line for a good five minutes. Yes it was the same email name he used a long time ago so she was certain it was him. The subject line was short, intriguing, dominating and curious. What could he want? She kept looking at the email header; it simply read 'midntspnkr You are Summoned!'

She kept looking and asking herself Should I open it? but she found no answers forthcoming. How many times had she gotten ready to open the email and then failed to click on it for some reason she couldn't answer.

Her mind drifted back to before she had actually met him, before she found the thrill of spanking and bdsm. She had gotten divorced from a marriage with a man who was completely vanilla (of course so was she back then) when the highlight of their sex life had been some quick missionary sex making sure they didn't wake the baby. After the divorce she worked and took care of her son, excluding all else for quite some time, years actually. During this period she found that playing with her clit could arouse her but she was lacking something. Thus began the fantasies.

She developed very detailed fantasies of a man taking her and making her do all those nasty things she read about. You know, the kinky kind, where she was forced to suck his cock and sometimes he even forced it down her throat until she thought she would choke.

Another fantasy was he would spank her for displeasing him in some way and then force her to bend over the bed where he would roughly use her virgin asshole - she really could climax with this one as she rubbed her clit harder and harder. There were more fantasies than she could remember but the one thing that stood out in her mind - she was always forced to submit or be a sex slave.

Time passed and her son began to grow but she still had these fantasies, she kept thinking they were wrong but couldn't wipe them from her subconscious. Finally she began to search the Internet for answers, only to find no or maybe too many answers out there. She joined a few of the more "kinky" services such as alt.com and bondage.com looking for answers. Of course the groups were dedicated to the "kinky" so how could they have the correct answers, but as she read more and more she began to think how could this be wrong as long as it was two consenting adults.

Then she would lie in bed with her fantasies, rubbing her clit, putting one or two fingers into her vagina and occasionally she would even moisten a finger and put it in her sweet rosebud, virgin anus. She drove herself to the point of crying out in erotic passion, but would not make a sound that her son might hear, and half-heartedly climaxed. Her body would shudder in climax and the tension she felt before would be gone but she knew something was still missing for, this big O she searched for and needed so desperately. As her body calmed down she would revert back to thinking this kinky sex was improper - but her subconscious knew better.

Then she met him on one of these websites, his comments were erotic, his suggestions were kinky and at that particular moment her urges were making her think in terms of her fantasies. Weakened by the erotic sensations of her body she responded to him, letting him know she had fantasies of submission and kinky sex but had never actually experienced any such pleasures. She exchanged her real email address with him as he had done with her. A day went by and nothing, two days and nothing; by the third day she was sure he found her childish and totally uninteresting. On the fourth day she was surprised to see an email from him - from his regular email address 'midntspnkr'. She couldn't wait to open the email even though it was almost time for work.

There she was, still in her robe, fresh from the shower and supposed to be getting ready for work. Something in her made her open the email, a rather lengthy and erotic story of what might or could happen to her. The more she read the more aroused she got, she opened the robe and exposed her small breasts to the cool air, her nipples quickly got erect and a small touch of a nipple would send chills down through her body and stimulate her crotch. She let the robe fall fully open and spread her legs to see if her sex was sending that aroma that drove men wild - oh she was moist all right, dripping almost.

As she read her body became more aroused; so intent on reading she never noticed her hand reach her vaginal lips, spreading them and inserting two fingers. The next thing she remembered was opening her eyes as she was ready to climax, two fingers fucking her and her thumb abusing her clit. She felt her body shudder as the orgasm surged through her little body and she almost collapsed.

As the orgasm subsided she managed to look at the clock, panic set in, it was past time to leave to take her son to school on her way to work. Quickly she dressed, putting her bra and blouse on. When it came time to put her panties on thoughts danced through her mind of him telling her to go to work without panties. She couldn't do that, no panties at work could she? Finally she chickened out putting panties on, but not the granny panties she usually wore, these were the skimpy thong panties she had purchased but never had the nerve to wear. Putting her hose and skirt on, tucking her blouse in, she could feel the cool air hitting her crotch where the panties barely covered her most private parts - her cunt, as he called it.

She dropped her son off with a kiss at school and rushed off to work barely making it on time. Then the daily grind set in but just as she became accustomed to the work a thought would cross her mind, does anyone here at work know what kind of panties I have on? Her skirt wasn't very short, mid thigh, but she was suddenly conscious of how much leg showed if she bent over so she kept reminding herself to bend at the knees to a squatting position rather than bending from the waist.

Of course then she began to think what can they see when they look at me in a squatting position, can they see my panties. She wasn't sure if it was the panties keeping her aroused all day, after all the thin part of the panties was riding up into her vaginal area sometime stimulating her clit; or was it the erotic email he wrote which she kept reviewing in the back of her mind?

By lunchtime she had to visit the ladies room and moisten a towel to clean the love juice from her private area. As she used the moist towel to clean she kept thinking why she referred to it as her private area when he used the word cunt to describe it.

He had asked her to concentrate on the more vulgar terms in describing things - you fuck, you don't just have sex; you have a cunt, not a vagina; you have tits, not breasts. She finished up and made a mental promise to herself that she would never again wear thong panties to work. She managed to make it through the rest of the day without keeping herself erotically aroused.

When she got home she barely had time to say hello to her son before rushing off to her bedroom to re-read that email from him. She read the email again; it was still up on the screen since she forgot to close it before rushing off to work. As she finished the email she realized the same thing was happening again - what kind of spell did this man have on her - her vaginal area was soaking wet again.

Reading the email for a third time she began to rub her crotch with her index finger, she was soaked and aroused. She got up, closed the bedroom door and slipped out of her panties. Stepping out of the panties she automatically brought them up to her nose - how gross she thought, she never did that before - all she could smell was the aroma of sex, her sex.

Throwing the panties in the dirty clothes she again sat at the computer, making sure to raise her skirt so her bare bottom was on the chair. She began to read the email again but this time she only read the really arousing parts. As she finished she was aware that once again her legs were spread and her hand was playing with her clit. Frustrated she closed the email and looked at the subject lines of all the new email she had gotten today.

"Goodness!" she exclaimed as she recognized another email from him and she hadn't even responded to the first one yet. Already aroused and sexually charged she skipped the rest, opening his email to see what else he had to say.

This email was even more arousing and graphic than the last. He covered all the things her fantasies had; he covered all the scenarios she had fantasies for and more. He was very explicit but where she would describe a scene like "he put his hand behind her head so he could gently persuade her to take his hard penis into her mouth fully," he described it as "grasping her hair he forced her to fuck his cock fast and furious, pausing only to tell her he was going to cum, and he was going to shoot down her throat so she better swallow all of that cum."

Yes he certainly had a penchant for those crude words, those words she could never bring herself to say but they certainly turned her on when he used them. She read the email many times, each time rubbing her clit and finally orgasming.

Exhausted she closed the email and responded to him. She, for the first time, opened up to him telling him how erotic his stories were and how they stimulated her but she was afraid that she could never do or say those things. She said she often wished she could let herself go enough to try them - to make some of her fantasies come true but she couldn't. She did tell him she had worn those thong panties to work and how aroused she had been all day long (well it was all morning long but she used a little writers literary license). She sent the email and went off to fix supper for the two of them.

Half way through making supper she dropped something on the floor, as she bent over to pick it up she felt this cool breeze on her vagina. "Oh my god!" she gasped realizing she had forgotten to put panties on - was it because he had encouraged her not to wear panties? She stood quickly and glanced around. Thank goodness her son hadn't been around to see that - imagine how a teenager would react seeing his mother's bare privates.

Supper was uneventful but she thought more about why she was not wearing panties and concluded it wasn't her subconscious desire to go without, nor was it his suggesting she go without. It was simply that she had taken off her damp panties and put them in the dirty clothes where they belonged. After supper her son went off to his room to do his homework.

Homework she thought, homework. Yes, that was it, he had assigned her some work to do; writing more on which of her fantasies she might want to become reality, to prove to her she could say those nasty words he so liked. She thought about it as she did the dishes from supper and then as she changed out of her clothes. By the time she finished changing she sat at the computer just as she realized she had stripped naked and only put on her robe. She could feel her nipples against the material of the robe and they were at full attention, her crotch was moist again. How could this happen to her? She hadn't had sex in five years, only the occasional orgasm through manual means. Now, she was dripping wet almost all day and getting hotter as the night rolled on. What kind of an effect was this mystery man having on her?

She finished the homework, confessing very truthfully that if any of her fantasies were to come true it would be learning to please a man by sucking his cock. It was like losing her virginity again as in all her 35 years she had never had a penis in her mouth; virgin territory for sure. The idea of some man controlling her like that, forcing her mouth down on his erect penis really seemed erotic to her. The next thing she opened up about was a desire to have her virgin anal tract invaded by a man's penis.

She knew she had a good body, thin, curvy, perhaps slightly small breasts and her nipples could become like pencil erasers when aroused but she had lived so conservative a life she couldn't let anyone know how sexy she felt.

She finished the two confessions of the fantasies she might like to experience, but it was the other part she couldn't bring herself to do. He wanted nasty bedroom language but it just wasn't something she could do - she never talked dirty, she never made noise when she climaxed. In fact she had never had much of a sex life, so how was she supposed to start now, just because he had directed her to do it. She sent the email off unfinished, knowing he would tell her she deserved a spanking for not finishing.

Spanking, hmmm, yes the thought did intrigue her but then she thought "this is only an email conversation, it's not likely that we will meet," so she boldly closed the email screen, smiling to herself that she was avoiding that spanking after all.

She tried to do other things, clean, get laundry ready, brush her teeth and get ready for bed. As she lay down on the bed she picked up the latest romance novel she was reading and began to pick up where she left off last time. It never fails, she thought as the first paragraph was one of those hot steamy lovemaking descriptions which brought her back to the mystery man's hold on her. Why did he hold so much power over her? How did he entrap her into submitting to his every request? The feelings began to stir up in her body again, she slipped a hand inside her robe and began to rub her nipple.

Annoyed with herself she got up and opened up her email again. As the screen opened she almost jumped out of her seat, there was an email from him again entitled "Finish it!" She quickly opened the email only to see it empty.

He hadn't warned her that she deserved a spanking for not finishing her assignment. He hadn't said anything about how good she was opening up and admitting what fantasies she desired most to come true, NOTHING. Her mind quickly told her it didn't make any difference because she was never going to meet this guy anyway.

She closed the email and looked at her inbox subject lines. The only one she could see was his "Finish it!" Nothing else struck her eyes, just that. She sat at the computer just looking at the screen until she realized one hand was inside her robe tweaking her already erect nipple and the other was between her legs rubbing her vaginal area. Her robe was open at the crotch fully exposing her shaved pubic area. Shaved pubic area - it seemed so natural now but two weeks ago she would never have dreamed of shaving or trimming her pubes - it was yet another demonstration of the power he seemed to have over her.

Never having met him, how could he make her do these things like shave her pubes, open her heart to him, confessing her need to express her sexuality, letting him know which fantasies she was determined to experience. She began to realize she was falling more and more under his control and she was letting him do it. She had to stop it or he might actually convince her to meet him. Thus far every time he suggested they meet she had successfully avoided meeting for one reason or another, but if she continued to let him control her sexuality, she would eventually succumb to his desires.

Here she was, pinching her nipple, hand in her crotch, totally naked except for her open robe doing everything he asked, but she was thinking about not responding to his last request.

The sensations in her groin were growing by leaps and bounds, soon she knew she would climax if she didn't stop but she was powerless. She could feel the orgasm building so finally she made the move, pulling her hands and preventing the orgasm. Her head was spinning from the lack of release, so excited was she that she barely saw his new email come in; subject "Do it Now." She opened it and all it said was "Do it now or we can't meet." Thoughts crossed her mind; here was the easy way out-all she had to do was nothing. Another thought was I need to meet him; he has great insight into my sexuality. The latter won out and she dutifully replied to the email, there was no question about what he wanted, she knew all too well he wanted her to write a story about one of her fantasies using all the naughty words, leaving out words like penis, vagina and so forth.

She started the email with a disclaimer "You don't know how hard this is for me to write using those vulgar words," but she soon settled into describing her fantasy through a mental image of what she anticipated. Soon her fantasy was frothed with phrases like "he used my mouth as his fuck toy," and "he tormented my nipples while his cock pounded into my willing cunt." All the time she could feel her face flush at the use of these words but she also noticed she was dripping wet between her legs.

She finished her assignment and was so hot she needed satisfaction. She reached into her nightstand drawer and brought out her thickest vibrating dildo. Before she sat down again she turned it on full speed, removed her robe and inserted it into her vagina (cunt as he would call it). She could immediately feel the sensations building in her towards orgasm but wanted it to last as long as possible. Sitting at the computer her nether region driving her to new depths of sexual stimulation she began to type another of her fantasies using those nasty words. As soon as she knew the orgasm was imminent, she clicked the send button and let loose with a very loud outcry at the peak of climax.

Instantly she was aware that, although her door was closed, her son could probably hear her scream, yet she was powerless to do anything about it until her body calmed down. Her son opened the door just as she stood up and removed the vibrator. She dropped it in the chair and reached for her robe to cover herself, but knew he had seen too much of her naked body.

"I heard you scream, are you alright?" he asked.

"Yes I just got angry at the computer but I am perfectly ok, thank you!" she replied, knowing full well she was not alright and still recovering from the most intense orgasm of her life, not to mention being humiliated by her son seeing her naked like that.

She heard the familiar ding the computer made when she received email. With a ghostly pale feeling, she returned to the computer. More mail from him, her heart fluttered as she read the subject line "Excellent."

Opening the email she read it "Excellent, I think your ready. Meet me tomorrow night at the Motel 6 at 6pm, down the street from your house, and don't wear any panties. This will be your first experience of making your fantasy come true." She felt her heart flitter some more and her stomach do flip-flops and then she began to wonder - how did he know where she lived? Did she know this mystery man?

"Oh my god," she thought and began to be embarrassed thinking that maybe she had opened up to one of her neighbors, telling them all those intimate thoughts. She immediately responded to him, "Meeting is out of the question. How do you know where I live? Do I know you?"

She waited by the computer for a response from him but time went by so slowly. She left the email up and decided to do the things necessary for bed. Finally she looked at the clock and saw it was way past her bedtime. She knew she would be dragging in the morning, so she flipped the robe over a chair and climbed into bed naked, something she never did before. As she tried to doze off, half heartedly listening for the ding of incoming mail, she thought, Here I am naked in my bed, just as he has always instructed me to sleep and I am worried he may know me, how can he control me this way?

It never crossed her mind to get up and put her nightgown on. Finally she dozed off only to be awakened by the ding of incoming mail. Glancing at the clock she saw it was 3:00 am, she had been asleep for about 3 hours. Arising, she walked over to the computer and saw email from him.