For every crime there is a punishment. I stole a laptop from work. That wasn't my crime, my crime was getting caught. It was Friday the 15th of Jan 2009; the whole office was out for lunch. Well, the whole office except for one person, the new boss. She was sending out emails to everyone saying the same thing:
"Like to meet...friendly chat...I'll buy you coffee"
I got the short straw 4.30 the very same Friday. The whole office used to clock off early and go for drinks on Fridays. The meeting would mean I would be late.
I sat waiting outside her office. I could just about see her face through the window; she had pale white skin, freckles and long red hair. The expensive suit and army of wrinkles gave away her age, gave away that she was a work all-hours career woman and must probably not to be messed with. Her plump secretary who was only a few years off retirement saw me gazing at the boss through the window.
"I think she's single but about twenty years to old for you, if you wanted my opinion."
The secretary had caught me off guard and I tried to rescue the situation "Oh Sorry, I was checking that my tie was straight in the reflection."
The Secretary gave me a look as the boss opened her office door. We both switched into professional mode straight away. The secretary went first
"Ms. Trimble this is John Gordon the junior analyst on the pricing team"
I quickly stood up and gave my new boss a firm hand shake and said
"Pleased to meet you Ms. Trimble."
"John why don't you take a seat and Anna you can go home I won't need you for anything else today" she replied.
I walked in and sat down. Ms Trimble came in behind me and closed the door before taking her seat across from me. I was going over my usual material for these types of situations in my head as Ms Trimble passed me a post-it note. It read:
`Laptop serial number akgm-83234-gtasb-6543'
I looked at the post-it note. Was that the serial number of the laptop that I had stolen?
"Now, if I type that laptop number into the tracking program it will give me its current location" she started to type.
"Bullshit" I thought to myself they can't do that. She finished typing then without looking away from the screen said
"My computer says the stolen laptop is located at an address that looks remarkably like your home address." Then she looked straight at me "Is there something you want to confess to Mr Gordon?"
"No" I said. Maybe I should have said more, maybe that would have made me look guilty.
"Did you notice James Jeffrey was not in work today?" she asked coolly as she tossed me a cell-phone "why don't you call him and ask him why he's not at work?"
I decided to call her bluff. I pushed his number into the phone. He picked up and answered straight; he said two cops showed up at his home the night before and arrested him for being in possession of stolen property. He said he was screwed, even if he got off light the criminal record would mean he could never work in our industry again. I hung up and looked at my new boss without saying a word.
"Looks like I have your full attention, now do you know what the difference is between you and James?" she asked.
I didn't know what to say, if I ran out of the office could I get home before the cops got there and destroy the laptop? Where there cops in the building? Finally I just said "no, I don't."
She smiled and said "I'll tell you. His ass doesn't look as good as yours does in a suit. So you can get fired now, get arrested and spend a couple of months in jail and never work in this industry again or you can start looking for another job and leave this firm within a month with a good reference."
Without thinking I just blurted out "what's the catch?"
She smacked her red lips and said "why you are, you're my catch. You will come to my house for the weekend and by my fuck-slave. And on Monday you'll come back to work as if everything was normal and find a new job and leave within the month. You won't look me directly in the eye ever again in the office, you won't tell anyone even after you leave. If you do I call the cops. So which option do you want?"
I was shocked I just said "what?"
She looked at her watch. "I will not repeat myself you have thirty seconds to make up your mind."
I looked at the ground; she was kind of hot for her age. "Ok" I said.
"Ok what?"' she said back.