I get off from work and leave my big red shoes at the door. The birthday goers were little hellions today and I need to relax. I loosen my overalls and when I get to the door I am greeted by a surprise.
You are all wrapped up in a bow kneeling before me in my room. Well, looks like I get to have a little fun for grownups this evening! My painted lips split into a wide classic smile.
"Well hello there! My name is Bombo the clown," I introduce myself.
My big red nose wiggles a little when I give you a bow, the bells on my hat jingling.
"It must be my birthday," I laugh, as I come back up with a glint in my eyes.
You shake your head, screams muffled by the ribbons shoved in and around your mouth. A perplexed look passes over my face at your apparent terror.
Clowns are silly and fun, we bring joy to innocent hearts all over the world! Are you really afraid of me? I smack my forehead at what is so obvious; it's the ribbons that must be causing all your distress!
"Can't imagine it's too easy to breathe like that," I comment.
I withdraw a ridiculously oversized pair of scissors from my puffy pants pocket.