Finally, I was finished. I had been working in my new yard for over a week, trimming bushes and pruning trees, clearing and planting flower beds, cleaning up the little stream and grotto that was hidden from the house. The grotto will be a great place to escape if I ever get the time. I had hired out the pool work. I wanted to use it this decade. The remodeling that had to be done would be enough of a challenge for me. I had fallen in love with this old farmhouse.
I just knew that it would be perfect after I put my stamp on it. It had a large yard and a wrap-around porch that provided a view of a garden in every direction. There were copses of trees in the areas between the neighbors' houses on every side. My house had been empty since late winter. The previous owner had been transferred rather suddenly to the big city with a fancy title. It was my luck and bane that I had found it. I had gotten a great deal on the house and as I looked closer, I was beginning to see why. It needed something done almost everywhere. I had promised myself I wouldn't do this again, but
This Old House makes it look so easy. But anyway, I was done with the yard for now. For all you gardeners out there, salute, I am just a plant and hope it works kind of guy. The yard is large; the nearest house is a good 1/4 mile away, but there is over a dozen houses situated over the area.
This was to be my first night staying here, my furniture had just been unloaded earlier that day. I was sitting on the porch drinking a cold one when I got the feeling I wasn't alone. When I turned around and saw these gorgeous creatures standing and watching me I was totally tongue-tied. These women were arrayed in typical hot weather outfits, short shorts and skirts, halters, crop tops and tube tops and they were bearing gifts. They had casseroles, salads, pies, ham, fried chicken, fresh fruit, and who knew what else. Seeing all this food I knew I wouldn't have to eat my own cooking for a while and it was making my stomach growl. Plus, looking at all these beautiful faces smiling at me was making me aware of another type of hunger.
I stood up from my chair, "Hello ladies." That drew a giggle from a couple of the younger ones in the back of the pack. "My name is Bill, Bill Feinder, and yes, I know, I have heard all the jokes. What can I do for you ladies?" More giggles and a few outright lewd smiles from some of the others. I knew I didn't look my best, I was hot and sweaty and my shirt was streaked with dirt and my pants were even damp. Heck it was hot out and I had been working, but I am reasonably good looking for a guy past 45.
A couple of the women in front looked at each other and in silent agreement, as the older of the two stepped forward, "Mister Feinder, we of the Firetop Community want to welcome you into our community." More giggles from the back, until the other woman in front snapped her head around and glared at them. Then it was only a couple of pouty, downcast faces.
"Yes, as I was saying. We saw your furniture being delivered today and we thought that would mark you officially as our neighbor. And we wanted to bring you... a few things... to eat. We thought you might be very hungry after all the 'hard' work you have done lately. And we thought it would also give us a chance to meet your wife, is she here?"
Well, that was succinct. "Ladies it is a joy to see all this... glorious food and I am quite appreciative, but no, there is no wife for you to meet."
Madam spokesperson stepped forward, "Well, I see. Would it be all right if we took this food into the kitchen and put it away for you? We would love to make sure you get settled in correctly." I gave my permission and walked to the screen door that led into the house. I opened it and watched the parade march past me to the kitchen. The looks I received as I stood there made me feel like a stallion on the auction block and a group of very anxious breeders were inspecting me. I didn't really mind since all the bidders were very good looking. Their smiles, wiggles and smell making me conscious that more than my eyes were being attentive. I remembered that I did have some lemonade, "If you ladies would like some lemonade it should be in the fridge. I also have some wine and beer in there. Help yourselves."
I was still standing there holding the door when they started back out. I then got to digest just what my neighbors looked like. Man, I had picked the right neighborhood. First was the matron, a brunette with a voluptuous figure in her early 50s. She was wearing a flowered sundress that came just above her knees. Following her was a redhead in her mid-30s wearing a white sleeveless blouse and very tight shorts. The next two were twins, late teens wearing daisy dukes, one in a tube top and the other a halter. They both had very attractive figures and sun bleached blonde hair. They also had a dimple each and on opposite sides of their cute freckled faces. The next two had to be sisters also. They had the same walk although one was 5' 8" with a willowy build and raven black hair in her early 30s. The other was 5' 4" with light brown hair and a very athletic, sinewy build in her late 20s. Both had on deep dipped crop top shirts with Firetop written along the front and short pleated skirts.
They all found places to sit and the matron of the group continued, "We have been remiss in introducing ourselves. I am Myra, the redhead is Stephanie, the twins are Debbie and Heidi and Rachelle has the black hair and the brunette is Beth. I should also tell you that this is not our entire Firetop Community Group, but we are the welcoming committee. And in case you couldn't tell, I am the mother of these three and the twins are Stephanie's." Pointing due west, "That is my house, the next house south is where Stephanie and the twins live and then due east of you, you can see two houses rather close to each other and that is Rachelle's and then Beth's. Now that we have the introductions out of the way, we would like to offer you our assistance with anything that you might need."
As my eyes scanned these women's eyes, I could see one thing in common; they all had a desire to be very helpful indeed and I was sure the double entendre was intended. I smiled my most charming smile, "I am very grateful to meet all of you ladies of the Firetop Welcoming Committee. As a matter of fact, I do have some ideas for remodeling that I would like a lady's opinion on, but I am sure that will be in the future. I first have to find a place for all my accumulated junk and treasures. I wish that I could have been prepared for your welcome. I am definitely not dressed for company."
I then heard the soft, sultry voice of Rachelle, "Beth and I volunteered to help you get settled into our community and we have no plans that cannot be changed until you are properly installed among us." At the raising of my eyebrows, she did blush a little, but kept her gaze on me and didn't change a word. The look in Beth's eyes showed no remorse at her sister's words at all. I just realized that those were the first words I had heard anyone else speak besides Myra.
"Well," Myra said, "I believe that Stephanie, the girls and I will leave you to Rachelle and Beth and we will check on your needs again tomorrow." With that the four of them stood as did I and the twins came up, pressing their bodies into each side of me and gave me a kiss on the cheek and walked away. I was trying to figure out what had happened to my organized life in the last 15 or 20 minutes but it was all a blur. I looked back to see Stephanie with her hand out and when I took it, she brought her other hand to clasp me and take our hands between her breasts lean forward and kiss me on the cheek and turn and walk away. Myra smiled at me and said, "I am looking forward to seeing you again, Bill" and she placed her hand on my shoulder, pulled me forward and kissed me so softly on the lips that I wasn't sure if she really had and also turned and walked away.
I had forgotten that Rachelle and Beth were still there and I was still standing in shock over the kisses I had received and boom they were all gone. I sat back down and tried to take another drink but my beer was empty. Rachelle brought me back to reality. "Here Bill, let me get you another one." And she bolted off the settee and inside and back out before I could really focus on her leaving.
Rachelle handed me the bottle of beer, and I noticed that she had her finger stuck in the neck of the bottle. When my hand wrapped around it, she took her finger out and stuck it in her mouth and sucked it clean, looking me right in the eye. I thanked her, I think. Beth decided to speak for the first time. "Bill, you have done a great job with the yard. It looks lovely. I know you have worked hard today, so why don't Rachelle and I make you some dinner while you go shower and then we can sit and watch the sun set here on the porch?" I tried to protest that they had done enough already but they wouldn't take no for an answer. Rachelle piped up, "If Momma found out we had left you in those sweaty clothes, unfed and hadn't helped you relax, well... we don't want to find out what she would do! We were selected by the Community to do our part and we plan on doing just that."
