"Do you want to switch it up? My leg is falling asleep and my ass is getting sore," my sister said in one of her exasperated tones.
"Sure, just pull over at the next rest stop and I'll take the last leg," I offered.
I was heading off to college. I had received a full scholarship to the Mayweather University in Phoenix, Arizona, and I couldn't wait to get started. They had one of the best Social Sciences departments in the country, where I was hoping to get my degree. I was leaning towards majoring in psychology and minoring in sociology.
My sister, Audrey, was driving down early with me to help me get settled in. It had been a while since we had spent any time together since
The Situation
. Our mother had found out from some of her male co-workers that Audrey had been making money as a 'cam-girl' and lost it. That had been a couple of years ago now, but things between them hadn't been the same since. Audrey had hoped that after transitioning into the more mainstream and artful pornography in Playboy that things would change, and our mother would be more understanding. I don't know what gave her that idea. Our mother has never been one to understand, and this topic was a doozy for her.
Yes, my sister was that Audrey. Audrey Aleen Allen aka Audrey Andalise, Miss June 2013. What's that like you ask? Well my friends were always telling me how unbelievably hot she is. So, no change there. I had probably seen her naked a bit more than the normal accidental sibling interactions would account for, but for the most part we maintain a fairly typical brother-sister relationship.
As for me, my name is Alexis. Not your typical boy name, I know. When my mother was pregnant with me, every sonogram ever taken failed to show my penis, so they all thought I was going to be a girl. My mother wanted to name her
new girl
after her mother. My grandmother passed away two weeks before I was born. When I came out with a penis everyone was surprised. My mother, in her infinite wisdom, decided to stick with the name Alexis and decided she would just call me Alex for short. Thanks mom.
It's not like it made my life difficult or anything. Oh wait, it did. At 5'4" with a tiny body and slightly feminine facial features and hips...the latter I tried to hide with baggy jeans, I was mocked relentlessly. At the beginning of each school year the teachers would call out the roll and, without fail call me Alexis, no matter how much preparation I had done to warn them before hand to call me Alex.
My long hair didn't exactly put that many points into the macho column either. I was going for more of a metal head, or grunge rock look, hoping it would help butch me up a little. It did to a degree, but only after I had started singing for a 70's rock high school cover band my senior year. The teasing didn't end, but it was noticeably less.
"About two more hours, I think," I mused after we had swapped seats and gotten back on the road.
Audrey had both of her feet up on the passenger seat staring out the window through a pair of big white sunglasses that obscured most of her face. Her long blonde hair, dyed to perfection, fell around her shoulders and even a little into her perfect cleavage.
"Good, I feel like we've been in this car forever!" she whined. We had started in Denver and had been at it for about ten hours.
"So, what should I be expecting in college?" I asked mostly in an attempt to distract myself from how bored I was, and also to feed my own growing curiosity.
"Sex, drugs and partying, with a little bit of learning thrown in...not necessarily in that order...at least for the first year or two until you settle down," she finished with a giggle.
"I didn't ask what
you
did at college!" I laughed, "What should
I
expect?" gesturing to my whole physique. "High school didn't really go over that well for me," I explained.
"College isn't like high school. Most people don't really care about that stuff in college. You should get along just fine," she assured me. "Just be yourself."
"I just hope I finally get laid," I accidentally mumbled out loud. Blushing, I desperately hoped she hadn't heard that over the radio.
I was almost able to breathe a sigh of relief when, "Wait, you haven't had sex yet?"
"No, not really," I grudgingly admitted.
"What do you mean
not really
? You either have or you haven't."
"Well just oral."
"You got a blow job?"
"Umm, no."
"What? Now I'm confused. Spill it baby brother."
"Remember Tiffany Scott?" she nodded recalling a girl I hung around since sixth grade. "Well I kinda went down on her."
"No way! You followed her around forever," she mused. "She didn't return the favor?"
"She gave me half a hand job and then said her arm was tired after a couple minutes."
"What a bitch! If someone goes down on me, I'll return the favor, and if I go down on them then I expect the same in return at the very least."
"Oh God sis, I don't want to think about you going down on guys!" I exclaimed.
"Who said anything about guys?" she teased.
Things started to become very tight in my pants. Resisting the urge to shift to a more comfortable position was becoming unbearable, but I was trying not to draw any attention to myself. The simple truth, my sister was a Goddess. I was guilty of spilling future generations, essentially committing genocide on a massive scale, while furiously beating it to images and fantasies of my sister. This was only made easier by my sister's choice of career, and the internet.
"Can we please not talk about this?" I asked keeping my eyes firmly on the road.
