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We Get Drunk An Underwear Incident

We Get Drunk An Underwear Incident

by atomica24
19 min read
4.45 (52800 views)
adultfiction
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Thank you for reading my story, I hope that you enjoy it. Love Mica xx, Yorkshire England.

All email comments good or critical welcomed. Please note that all email comments from an invalid email address will be deleted immediately and will not be read, so please take care when entering your email. Rude or abusive comments may result in blocking. Please note that I am a British female, and I write in British English and vernacular, so for me a fanny is the correct term for female genitalia, a pussy is a pet cat and the ass is a bum or arse.

I trudged home off the bus, the rain falling in vertical sheets, my umbrella protecting me and creating a cascade of water around me. The bus had been crowded and a smelly woman had sat herself beside me almost as soon as I had gotten on, and she had only got off one stop before me. I just hoped that she planned to have a shower when she got home. I pitied the people that she had to spend all day with. I had ignored her, staring out of the bus window as we wound our way from the town centre to the suburbs.

The downside of working in the centre of town is that you pretty much have to use public transport to get to work, traffic in and out during rush hours is just a non stop crawl. True the buses whiz along the bus only lanes, but then they stop every minute to let passengers on or off, so at the end of the day they are not much quicker than cars, just less stressful, and when you get to your destination, you don't have to try and find somewhere to park.

Work was a five minute walk from the bus stop, a featureless office in the centre of town, ideally located in the summer when the days were warm and you could explore the shops. Home was a ten minute walk from the suburban bus stop where the only thing you had to worry about was avoiding the dog excrement that thoughtless owners didn't clear up.

Within a five minute walk from home I had a number of good take-aways and restaurants, and that had been one of the reasons I had chosen this house over the other options. It wasn't the cheapest, but the local facilities were pretty top notch. I unlocked and opened my front door, shaking my umbrella and then furling it and putting it by the radiator, and then I slipped off my coat and draped it over the back of a chair I kept in front of the radiator for rainy days.

I turned the heating up a few degrees, I was feeling the cold, and the woman on the bus had me craving a shower, it was as if her odour had permeated my hair and skin. I shuddered at her memory. Tomorrow was a Saturday, I could lay in, although I rarely did, my brain still woke me up at six in the morning work or not, and regardless of what time I went to bed the evening before. It was as if my brain hated me.

I went up to my bedroom and stripped. My jacket and skirt would be fine for next week, I checked, no odour. My blouse went into the laundry as did my bra and knickers. I rubbed my mound, no, I didn't need to shave, I would be fine, I would have a bath on Sunday and shave then. I put some leggings and a thin top on the radiator to warm for when I came out of the shower, I wouldn't bother with any underwear for the evening.

I turned on the shower, waited a moment for it to get to full pressure and heat and then stepped in. My shower was an over the bath affair, I hated the step in and out, but, it was what I had. It was electric and so didn't require a tank of hot water or an instant heat boiler. It just worked, and I loved the pressure, it was a bit like a jet wash at times, it really pummelled my back.

I stepped out, wrapped a towel around my hair and then patted myself dry with a towel before going into the bedroom and sitting in front of the radiator with my hair dryer. I had treated myself to a Dyson hair dryer a few years ago when it had been in a Black Friday sale. I have to be honest, it wasn't that much better than a cheap one from Curry's. Hair dry and then put into a high pony with a hair band and some grips, I threw my top and leggings on and went downstairs to think about food.

The front door banged, loudly, persistently. Only my brother and the police knock like that. I opened the door.

"Hello Kayleigh," he said, knowing that the full version of my name irritates me. I prefer 'Kay'.

"Hello Matt," I said abbreviating his name which he hates, he prefers the full name of Matthew.

"What are you doing tonight?"

"Nothing much, I may go up town after I have eaten, but I am not really fussed, it is chucking it down and going out drinking in the rain can be a chore." I had actually planned on just staying in but Matt doesn't really accept answers like that, so I embellished my response in a way that would end up with me staying in.

"Well you can't go out like that Sis, go and get your glad rags on, we'll go out and eat. I'm Hank Marvin and need food."

"So my little brother is starving huh?" I said.

"Just ever so a lot, and less of the little, I am less than a year younger than you."

"And precisely where do you think we are going? Town will be full."

"Yeah, but you have a whole parade of eateries just around the corner. We can hit them till we find one that can fit us in."

"Fine. You wait here, I'll go and find something to throw on."

I went upstairs and opened my wardrobe. I pretty much knew what I was going to wear, I really only had one posh frock, and that was my Chinese silk blue dress I got from Shein. It had a high neck, short sleeves and finished at the knee. It was suitable for any occasion in any culture. I really loved it, and usually wore it when going out. To be fair, my only other alternative was a low cut red dress with petticoat hem, and I wasn't feeling it today. Also, I didn't need my cleavage on display when I was out with my brother. The blue dress was perfect. I rummaged in my lingerie drawer and found my matching blue underwear, a soft cup blue bra and a blue thong. I wouldn't bother with stockings, although I did have a blue suspender belt to match, but this was my brother, not a hot date.

I stripped my top and leggings off and put my bra and knickers on, and went into the bathroom to clean my teeth and spray a little EDT. As I returned to my bedroom Matt was sat on the edge of the bed.

"Come on sis, time's a wasting."

"Jeez Matt, can't I even dress in peace?"

"No, why should you, come on, hurry up."

I ignored him and stepped into my dress, doing up the four buttons across my left shoulder and smoothing the front down. It was fine, it did not need a steam, I have so few clothes that they rarely get wrinkled in the wardrobe, there is no overcrowding. My blue kitten heels were at the bottom of the wardrobe, I hauled them out and then sat on the bed and put them on.

"Right, there, done, satisfied now?" I said as headed to the stairs, turning my bedroom light off after me and leaving Matt in the dark. My coat was almost dry, certainly dry on the inside, so I could wear it. It didn't go with my outfit in that it was camel coloured, but it was the only decent coat I had. It was either that or a green parka with a furry hood, like Kenny is Southpark.

Matt followed me down and stood hovering behind me.

"What now?" I asked, "I am almost ready."

"I was born ready." He retorted.

"Only for a nudist farm and I am not going to a nudist farm with my brother."

"Oh? Who would you go with?"

"No one that you know Mr. Parker, Mr. Nosey Parker."

"My side is splitting with laughter," he said. I really didn't care one iota.

I put my coat on and buttoned it up down the front, I didn't want to get rain on my silk dress, picked up my handbag and umbrella, and had my house keys in my hand ready.

"Right, shall we go?" I asked, "I suppose you want to share my umbrella."

"Be the sisterly thing to do," he said.

I stood under my canopy and locked the front door, put my keys in my handbag and opened the umbrella and stepped away from the house and into the weather. We walked arm in arm to the street and then turned left towards the shops, Matt walked on my outside, streetside, he was a pillock, but he was good like that.

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The rain was still coming down in torrents, but we managed to keep sheltered under the umbrella, and soon enough we were at the parade of eateries.

"What do you fancy?" I asked, "there's a reasonable selection and they are all okay."

"I fancy a Chinese," he answered.

Well he would, wouldn't he, it was the furthest away. We walked on and soon we were stood in front of Wok Garden, a restaurant and takeaway. Matthew opened the door and I shook the umbrella and put it down before entering the restaurant.

We were greeted by a severe looking chap with oriental features, but having been here before, I knew he spoke with a broad Yorkshire accent.

"Do you have a quite table for two?" Matt asked, "one away from any doors."

A pet peeve of Matt was to be sat near a constantly opening door. I recalled him almost losing it once in a restaurant when we were seated near the kitchen doors, it had been an almost non stop flurry of swinging doors. He had demanded to be moved, and so we were moved near to the toilets. He has never, as far as I know been back to that restaurant and he gave them a pithy review on trip advisor.

We were taken upstairs which was virtually empty, although I knew it would fill up as the evening progressed, and were seated in the corner by a window overlooking the street. Matt thanked the waiter who actually smiled. I wondered if we had been stitched up, but if we had, I couldn't see how.

We sat and perused the menu. I was going to have a chicken and sweetcorn soup, Matt wanted a hot and sour soup. He had a greater tolerance to spices than I did. I was okay with Indian spices, but Thai and Chinese could be too hot for me, i think they used different chillies. We ordered some spare ribs and prawn toast to go with, and then we ordered three mains to share, a crispy shredded beef with a chilli sauce, I expected Matt would eat most of that, a sweet and sour prawns, and a roast duck with orange sauce.

For sides we ordered some soft noodles, a fried rice and a mushroom yung pow rice. Matt also ordered a bottle of French white wine to go with and a bottle of tap water. Pretty comprehensive, but I knew that they would box up what we didn't eat, and that would probably see me through the weekend in meals. I am not much of a cook.

"So," Matt said, "what is happening in Kayleigh's world. Gotta feller?"

"No, thin pickings at the moment. There is a chap at work sniffing around, but dating someone from the office is just not an option."

"Yeah, can be awkward, mostly when you split up though, then all the rumours start going round. Tried it once, never again."

"What about you," I asked.

"Nah. I was going out with Sarinda, but her Dad caused issues, I wasn't the right skin colour, the right religion and I didn't have the right clothing."

"Some families can be a bit like that, it is just a cultural thing."

"To be honest, where I live, I am the cultural minority."

"Tell me. It has never been an issue for me though, I have never experienced that kind of bias."

"Lucky. Still, it saved me having to drag the family across to the sub-continent for a wedding."

"Couldn't you have had it here in Bradford?"

"That is what I meant by the sub-continent."

"You bloody idiot."

Our starters arrived, the two soups and then a plate with the ribs and prawn toast. I do like the way the Chinese present their soups, in a deep bowl with a really big patterned porcelain spoon. Chopsticks were also placed besides us.

My soup was fab, I love chicken and sweet corn. I have been known to order three extra when I order a takeaway and store them in my freezer. It helps me avoid the minimum order surcharge. That often catches me out as I usually am only ordering for one.

"Crikey, that's spicy," Matt said after his first mouthful. I smiled inwardly, he has a habit of thinking he can tolerate hot spice, when really, he can't. I knew that he would eat the lot without another word simply to save face.

I finished my soup and took a rib and a prawn toast and placed them on my plate. Matt was still 'enjoying' his soup. The ribs were sticky and I was glad of the finger bowl to cleanse my fingers. The toast was thick with a prawn coating and was really quite good.

Matt eventually caught up and we waited for our mains. The servers came and cleared our table, placing our chopsticks on little porcelain stands, and replacing the finger bowls and napkins. Shortly after a trolley appeared with our main selection. Three bowls of food were placed in the middle, and then three bowls of our sides were placed around them. The waiter topped up our wine and we were ready to dive in.

As expected Matt went straight for the spicy chilli, I took some noodles and then placed some sweet and sour on top, and added a small portion of fried rice. I like variety. I also had a small portion of his chilli beef, if only to ensure he didn't get all of it.

My glass of wine was soon empty and the server topped my glass up emptying the bottle, Matt asked for a second bottle, his glass also being empty.

The sweet and sour was my favourite. I like how it was served loose and not in a ball of something, I didn't like that way of presentation. I managed to not disgrace myself with the chopsticks and also managed to keep my dress clean, not any easy feat when you are woman who has breasts that like to protrude across the table.

Before I knew it we were on a third bottle of wine, it was going down a little too easily. It also looked as if there would be precious little in the way of carry out boxes, we were demolishing the lot. The chilli beef was a little spicy, but I managed to go back for more. Our conversation had been along the lines of the kind of people we were attracted to. It seems Matts preference was someone with boobs, mine was someone without tattoos and without a sports season ticket. I didn't care what sport, they pretty much all bored me.

"God, you have no standards," I said to Matt, "if she has a fanny and boobs, you are there."

"Well, yes, of course. I don't want to stick my hand up a girls skirt and discover she has a dick, or that her boobs are just padding."

"Does interesting conversation not mean anything to you?"

"Hell no, that is what I have a sister for."

"You are impossible."

"No, no I am not, I am consistent is what I am."

Eventually the third bottle of wine was finished, and all of the bowls were empty. I was actually surprised. We ordered pineapple fritters and ice cream to finish. They were rather sweet and I am glad that we had finished the wine before we started our deserts.

"My treat," Matt said when the bill arrived, "you can leave them a tip."

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He gave the server his card and then when the receipt came I handed the server a ten pound note and said thank you and that we had really enjoyed our meal. The server smiled and bowed and then went and retrieved my coat and umbrella. It was only then that i realised that they hadn't given us any prawn crackers. How odd.

The stairs down seemed somewhat steeper than when we came up and I found myself gripping the handrail. I put my coat on and buttoned it up, which again, seemed somewhat more difficult than it had been at home. Strange that.

Outside the rain had stopped so no need for the umbrella, and so we walked home arm in arm, along roads that seemed to have lengthened since we left home a couple of hours before.

I managed to unlock the front door, it took a few attempts, my key didn't seem to want to go into the lock, and then we were in. I deadlocked the door behind us and sort of fell onto the sofa.

"That was good food," Matt said as he sat beside me.

"Yes, thank you." I replied and then I realised something. It had not occurred to me before. No way Matt could drive home, not after the amount of wine he drank, and I only have one bed, and that is mine.

"You can have the sofa," I said.

"I've already got one, I have nowhere to put it."

"Idiot."

I stood up, it seems with some difficulty, and took my coat off and put it, sort of, by the radiator. I managed to sit down again and the reality that I was somewhat drunk struck me.

"God, I'm pissed, you got me pissed," I said.

"I am not sure, but I think you drank it yourself, I don't recall pouring the wine into your mouth."

"Why would you do that?" I was pretty convinced he had gotten me drunk, I couldn't figure out why though.

"Why would I what? I didn't get you drunk, all I did was buy the wine. I am going to the loo."

He got up and went to the downstairs loo leaving the door open and shortly after my ears were treated to the sounds of splashing. At least it was in the bowl. I heard him wash his hands and then he came back in, still tucking himself away and doing up his zipper. He flopped next to me on the sofa.

"Crikey, I needed that," he said, "wow that really came out."

"Yes," I answered, "I heard."

And of course then I needed to go, so I got up and wandered to the loo, pulled my knickers down and sat, and then stood again to lift my dress up which I had managed to sit on, and then sat back down. In all the shenanigans in the loo my knickers fell off from around my ankles. Just hanging off my right foot. I looked down and tried to bend to reach them and put them back, but couldn't.

I wiped myself and stood up and as I took a step forward my knickers released themselves and lay discarded on the floor. I kicked them to the side, washed my fingers and went back to the lounge, and fell onto the sofa. I felt odd. It wasn't the drink, although that was a contributory factor to why I felt odd, no, it was the fact that my fanny was all uncovered under my dress. It didn't have that 'comforting' feel that knickers give you. It wasn't unpleasant, it was just odd.

"What was your favourite?" Matt asked.

"The bit between us arriving and leaving," I said, "the rain stopped inside the restaurant, it was good."

"I went to a restaurant in Gambia where they had no roof and they gave you table umbrellas for your food," Matt said, "but you had to provide your own for you or you got wet."

"What? You're joking." That sounded mad.

He shrugged and laughed and tickled me, which is annoying, and my legs and arms were flying all over.

"You'll rip your dress if you're not careful," he said.

I realised he was right and I loved this dress, so I decided to sit there in my undies. I managed to undo the buttons on my left shoulder, and then had to stand up to undo the zip. I managed that and the dress slipped down and fell to the floor. I bent down and picked it up and put it on the back of the armchair.

I went and sat back on the sofa.

"Nice view there Kayleigh," Matt said laughing, "very nice, best I have seen in a while."

"What are you going on about?"

"Well, I am no connoisseur, but I reckon you have the best looking fanny this side of the North Sea."

Oh fucking shit, I had forgotten about my knickers on the floor of the loo.

"And you shave, and that is something I love, the feel of a shaved fanny on my tongue is something to savour."

"Now you are being crude," I said.

"No, not crude, I would just love to slide my tongue along that little groove and enjoy your flavours."

It had been a while since I had been laid, too long actually, and I was a little drunk. I opened my thighs and parted my legs.

"What, along here?" I asked pointing at my widening crease.

He got up and turned to face me and knelt on the floor between my legs, leant forward and I almost creamed as he ran his tongue between my labia, oh fuck. I gasped.

"God I didn't think you actually would," I panted as his tongue pressed into my valley, "you're my brother."

"Yes, yes I am," he mumbled his mouth seemingly full of his sisters petals. I felt a stirring at my entrance, and then he pressed in what felt like two fingers, entering me, passing my opening and into my depths.

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