Todd abandoned work for the day. Suddenly, his investment deal seemed no more important than a board game. He stayed in his office, feet on the desk, his gaze directed out towards the tree line of the property, seeing nothing in particular. He had weathered a crisis that could have been the downfall of his family life; of his family, really. But instead of condemning or recoiling from him, his daughter had looked deeper than he could have expected, and seen him in his complexity: a man with passions who allowed those passions to co-mingle with an unshakeable love for his only child. Sitting there, he thought: she saw that. It amazed him, and it elevated his estimation of Jessie as a person.
He felt a lightness in his being, a burgeoning sense of possibilities. And it wasn't because his biotech stock had spiked. Something finer and more enduring. He berated himself as he sat there, thinking of how he had objectified his daughter, practically made her into a porn figure for his enjoyment. But this had all changed.
Todd went to the kitchen for a cool drink and found his wife, Trish, unpacking groceries.
He went to her and put his arms around her.
"Nice time at the gym?" he asked.
"The usual. How's the project coming?"
"Ah, I'm taking the day off. We're still waiting for contract bids, anyway. And the county needs to approve the rezoning."
"I thought that was a sure thing." Trish said as she folded the paper bags.
"Pretty much. But it has to go through committees. It'll be next spring, earliest." Todd said, spinning a bell pepper on the countertop.
"What do you say we all go to Girards for dinner tomorrow?" he said. "The three of us. We haven't been there in some time. Remember that halibut with rock shrimp? What do you think?"
"Sure. If we can get in."
"It's the middle of the week, and we've always run up a big bill there. Can't hurt to try."
"Go ahead. Work your charm on them. Jessie might want to have Bernard come, too."
"The more the merrier. I'll ask her." Todd said, pleased to be arranging a family outing. Normally, that was Trish's domain.
He found Jessie out by the pool. She was reading a novel, stretched out on a chaise longue. His approach was from behind her, and as he came near he found himself looking at her tanned legs, crossed at the ankles. He thought, well, there they are, and how can I not see them. No big deal. He came to her side and she looked up from her book. She closed it and laid it beside her.
"Hi, Daddy." she said. "Are you okay?"
"Sure, honey. Thanks for asking." he said.
"Pull up a chair. It's gorgeous out here, isn't it?"
Standing beside her, Todd could smell coconut tanning lotion and the fragrance of her hair. His eyes moved down to where her bikini bottoms enveloped the subtle mound at the juncture of her thighs. He began talking about the dinner date, but another voice whispered inside him as he did - 'if you move closer, you might smell that, too. There it is, baking in the sun...'
"Yeah, tomorrow." he heard himself say. "See if Bernard wants to come. A double date, you might say."
"I think he's busy, Dad. But the three of us, that would be cool."
Todd detected a note of ire at the mention of Bernard, Jessie's boyfriend.
"Call him. See if he can break away." Todd said, knowing he was fishing.
"Just the three of us would be nice, okay Daddy?" Jessie said, and gave him a look as if to say - let's drop it.
" Alright, honey." Todd said, remembering that had Jessie been out walking in nature with Bernard that morning, as he'd supposed she would be, none of the earlier events would have happened.
The best Todd could get was a reservation for the next week, but, really, what was the hurry? Musing at his desk, he realized that the gourmet dinner would be, unbeknownst to the others, a celebration of his reconciling with Jessie. Or, he thought further, his brow knitting at the prospect, was he going on a date with Jessie, and Trish would be there to give it legitimacy? He told himself he was reading too much into a simple outing, but he remembered, too, the flashes of desire, the small voice in his head, when he spoke to Jessie at the pool. This isn't over, he thought. It just isn't. Shit.
He held his head in his hands and tried to erase the thoughts, but there was an indelibility to them, a fatefulness.
Todd sat across from the television in shorts and T shirt. The big game was on and the din of a fevered crowd poured from the speakers.
He moved to the edge of the sofa "That's it! That's it! Okay! First down and then some!" Todd enthused loudly. "I'll drink to that!" he declared, and took a long swig from his beer.
He put his feet up on the ottoman and reached for the chips.
"Hi, Daddy." he heard Jessie say as she entered the room.
"Hey, Jess. We're on an ass-kicking roll here, sweetie. Corrigan just ran for thirty yards."
"Great." Jessie rejoined, not showing much interest, and walking towards him with slow, careful steps.
"Daddy, I've got such a headache. I mean, I've practically overdosed on Motrin." she said, sitting down beside him and moving her head from side to side. "Fuck! It hurts!"
Todd was taken aback by her choice of words and felt she must really be hurting.
"And my neck! It feels like there are steel cables there instead of muscles. Maybe a hot water bottle would help. I don't know. Shit!"
Todd saw tears drop from her eyes onto the carpet.
"Could you rub my neck a bit, Daddy? If I could just relax that."
