Through a Glass Darly

Setting: A house somewhere on the coast of Florida.

Dramatis Personae:

Karen, age 32

Minus, her younger brother

(Karen, the siblings' mother)

Liv, a neighbor

The action takes place on the day of Karen senior's funeral.

—The house seems so empty.

—I know. Mom could light up an entire room.

—She was something all right. One in a million.

—Are you going to keep the house?

—Move down here you mean? I don't think so. I like where I am.

—Me too.

—You want it?

—The house? She left it to you.

—We could switch. Your inheritance for the house. They probably have about the same value.

—Karen, I'd be lost in a place this size. I don't know how mom managed it, after dad died.

—She entertained a lot. Had lots of friends.

—Maybe if I was married, had kids...

—You should get married, Minus.

—What about you?

—I've been down that rocky road, remember?

—No, I mean kids. Your beauty? They'd be amazing.

—Maybe someday. And please don't tell me time is running out. I'm only 32, OK?

—I did mean to tell you how nice you looked today.

—Thanks. But black isn't my color.

—It goes well with your blonde hair. And your red lipstick? I like your new 'do, by the way.

—Well aren't you Mister Haute Couture all of a sudden?

—I'm just saying, darling...

—That's a first.

—What?

—You calling me darling.

—What's wrong with me calling you darling?

—I didn't say there was. And these black stockings, I could do without them in this climate.

—Why don't you take them off? Not that you don't look great in them.

—You're awfully full of compliments today. You feeling better? You seemed really down earlier.

—It was mom's funeral, Karen.

—I know but in general the past couple days. Are you taking your anti-depressants?

—I skipped them for a few days. It didn't seem right.

—What didn't?

—Having that false sense of...the whole time we were laying mom to rest.

—She was cremated, Minus.

—You know what I mean...

—Oh, look! The sun just broke through the clouds. That'll warm the pool up. Let's get out of this funk and go for a swim.

—Do you really think that's appropriate, Karen?

—Why not?

—The funeral just ended, like, three hours ago.

—So? You know how mom was, Minus. If she could speak to us now she'd say, Stop moping around and enjoy life. Have some fun! Life goes on...

—I really wasn't thinking in terms of going swimming this trip. I didn't pack a bathing suit.

—You just gave me an idea! Karen said, chair scraping back as she rose. They'd been sitting around a glass-topped table on the lanai, still in their dark funeral clothes, sipping vodka-spiked lemonade that had been a frozen cylinder moments earlier. —I'll be back in a few...

—Where you going?

Karen turned at the sliding-glass doors. —Keep your shirt on. I'll be right back.

Karen's black skirt hung to just above her knees. Below, the black stockings clung as a second skin, highlighting the contours of her perfect calves, the beauty of her feet exposed in half-heel sandals with open toes. Through the sheer toes of her hose you could see, up close, her nails lacquered red like her lips.

Minus sat there wondering if Karen had ever looked more beautiful. Black not her color? She must be dreaming. Her pale skin and blonde hair and the bright-red of her lips and nails...the contrast was exquisite; perfection. If she doesn't have one already, Minus thought, caressing his erection through the front of his black suit trousers, I should buy her a little black dress for her birthday. I'll have to take a peek at her clothes before she returns to Chicago and find out her size. And why was Karen blessed with such physical perfection while I, I, am still the same skinny-minny I was when I was a teenager. It's like my body has never matured, Minus thought. Even mom joked about it from time to time, on those rare occasions when we were intimate. —Look at you, Minus! You're so skinny! We've got to put some meat on your bones while you're here. Bulk you up! Come to me, darling. Come here...

It was a good fifteen minutes before Karen emerged again. The contrast could not have been more stark. She stepped back onto the lanai wearing a flowery bikini, albeit a relatively modest, high-waisted one. Smiling, she fell into a model's pose, fingers locking behind her blonde head.

—Mom's! she declared. —Isn't it amazing? Even into her fifties she still had it. What a body! Look how it fits me, Minus. Maybe one size too big, but...

—It... Minus never finished his response. He was worried about his erection showing. He pulled his chair closer to the table, under glass that was fortunately frosted; a scallop-pattern, dark out of sunlight. Something, speaking of dark, flew his way. It landed on the table. He picked the skimpy thing up. It was a panty, navy-blue. —What's this?

Karen was still grinning, though her pose had dissolved. —Put it on. I got it out of mom's drawer. It'll do as a bathing suit for today. Look just like a Speedo. I bet it fits you, skinny as you are, Minus.

And with that Karen took a running dive into the shallow end of the pool. She surfaced, smiling, —Oh, this is perfect! Just like Chicago in the summer! Put your suit on, Minus, and join me.

—It's not a bathing suit, Karen, Minus said, holding the panty up, fingering its silkiness. —I'll pass.

—Minus, stop being such a stick in the mud. Come join me. Hurry up, while the sun is out. We'll have fun. We'll play. Chase the blues away... Adding: —I'll turn my back. I won't look.

—That's OK, Minus said, rising reluctantly and heading off to the changing bathroom in lanai's back corner. This meant passing Karen by in profile and once again Minus worried that she would notice his erection. As if it wasn't bad enough seeing her in black stockings, Minus thought, as he hurried past, now I've got to see her body bared in mom's bikini? Things were getting beyond confusing! Minus locked himself inside the bathroom. In truth, he wished he could have stayed inside. Masturbated and then been done with his commingled desires. Instead he undressed, took a cold shower and bent his gender for the first time by pulling on a pair of women's panties. His late mother's, no less. They were the same size, it turned out, just as Karen had predicted.

—Well don't you look cute! Karen declared, as Minus finally emerged. —What were you doing in there, writing one of your one-act plays?

—I...took a quick rinse.

—You would look great in a Speedo, young man.

Why was Karen calling him young man? It sounded almost...maternal. No, more like dad back in the day. —I have one, I just didn't pack it, Minus explained.

—You've got the build for it, Minus. Trim but kind of muscular. You been working out?

—I have a gym membership, Minus replied, vaguely.

—Jump in! Join me!

Minus was hoping the dark microfiber fabric of the panty would help hide the remnants of his passion. Once he finished descending the pool steps, as he was slowly doing now, the cold shock of the water would do the rest. And what was that crack she made about his playwright aspirations? She made it sound like...like masturbation or something.

—It's freezing in here, Karen!

—Oh, stop being such a wimp! This is Florida in the winter not...Alaska! Come to me, baby. Put your arms around me. I'll warm you up.

Playfully, Karen splashed water on Minus as he waded forward.

—Stop it!

Karen laughed.

—No, I mean it!

—Stop being such a baby!

They were in wan sunlight, mid-pool. They put their arms around each other. Minus hugged Karen tight.

—See? Isn't this better?

Minus's teeth chattered. —If you say so. Even your body's cold.

—No it's not. It's 98.6 degrees. A hot summer day on the beach. We could've walked to the beach but this is better, don't you think?

—I would say so.

—More private?

Karen's wet hair had turned dark—darker. Minus kissed it, just off the part. He kissed her left cheek, her shoulder. He nibbled her flesh.

—That tickles!

He bent down, almost to water's surface, and kissed Karen's breast swells in the bikini. He brought his hands to them and squeezed their softness. Karen's right hand, meanwhile, had strayed downward to the front of Minus's bikini panty. She caressed his cock. She pulled the panty down and stroked it. —I was afraid you were in there, you know...

—Where?

Minus's own hand was squeezing Karen between the legs. As with hers he slipped his hand inside the nylon, mom's bikini bottom, and squeezed her flesh directly. He ran his middle finger between her lips and, for the first time since entering the pool, discovered warmth, Karen's wetness thicker than water, viscous, slippery. Sublime.

Karen nibbled his earlobe. Whispered, —Fuck me.

—You want me?

—Fuck me, Minus.

They kissed on the lips. Karen's tongue was warm as well. —Fuck me, she repeated.

—Let's go in the bedroom, where it's warm.

—No, it's warm in the sunlight. Here in the pool, on the steps.

—Here?

Karen was leading him by the hand. She exhaled. —I'll sit on the top step, out of the water, you stand on the first step. Or maybe on the bottom. Let go. And take off that silly panty.

Both of them undressed, quickly, Karen tossing both pieces of her mom's bikini onto the lanai. After she took her place on the top step and spread her legs Minus came forward. The bottom step was too high so he stood on pool's bottom, the water up to his waist. Karen, bending his cock down, guided him into her warmth. They embraced, Minus kissing the top of Karen's head again. She tasted, smelled of chlorine.

—It's been such a long time, Minus, Karen said. —Fuck me. Fuck me hard, darling.

With Minus's forward motion, his thrusts, came waves of pool water. —A tsunami, Karen joked at one point. Looking over her shoulder, trying to focus on anything but cumming, Minus watched the pool water thin out and advance over the lanai. It reminded him of an errant wave on the beach, one that exceeded all the others in reach. One that you might dance around if you were strolling along the shoreline, at sunset, trying to avoid getting your shoes wet.

Karen returned with two large bath towels, even though she'd already dried her body off and put the bikini back on. She handed Minus a towel.

—What were you looking at just now? she asked.

—Oh. Mom's panty. It's at the bottom of the pool. I better go get it.

—Get it later, Karen said. —Dry off and get dressed and let's make some sort of dinner plans. I'm starving, aren't you?

—I guess, Minus said half-heartedly.

Karen said turn around and blotted Minus's back and bottom with the second towel. —Listen, I was just thinking..., she said —What if I did move in here, got a job? Which with my resume wouldn't be a problem. You could move in too and we could share the house. For a while anyway.

Minus was silent.

—Think about it. I'm tired of the cold. You know what else, sweet boy? The whole time you were fucking me just now? Not, Karen added with a laugh, —that it was for all that long. But...you kept calling me mommy. Did you hear yourself?

The blood drained from Minus's already pale face. —No.

—You didn't hear yourself shouting mommy over and over?

—No, Minus repeated.

Karen was smiling. —You sure?

—I...it must've been an unconscious thing. I was trying not to...

—Well you did. Is it because I'm wearing mom's bikini? Is that what made you think of her?

—I—

The doorbell rang, distantly.

—Who the fuck could that be?

Karen sighed and wrapped the slightly damp second towel around her body, knotting it above her breasts. —I better go answer it.

The middle-aged woman at the door was holding a lidded crockpot, a cloth on its underside wrapping around to the handles. She flashed an embarrassed smile at Karen and said:

—I'm sorry to bother you. You must be Karen. I'm your mom's neighbor, next door. I'm so sorry about her...her passing and I wanted to pass along my condolences. My husband and mine.

—Thank you, Karen said, fiddling with the towel knot. —That's very kind of you.

—I thought you might be hungry so I... The lady looked down at the pot. —It's nothing special. Just Swedish meatballs. Ingmar likes 'em. He's my husband.

—And I'm sorry. Your name is...?

—Oh. Liv. Liv, Karen. We've been your mother's neighbor ever since...well, going back to when she and your dad moved down here. Well I won't keep you, but...

—No, we appreciate it. I—"

Liv had leaned in. She spoke in near whisper, confidentially. —Listen, Karen. Please don't think I'm a nosy neighbor or anything but...I can't help what I hear and sound really travels in this neighborhood, the houses are so close together and all.

Liv, still holding the crockpot, took a deep breath. —I just wanted you to know...we could hear you just now, in the pool? The two of you? I thought you might want to know.

Liv laughed, seemingly despite herself. —It doesn't bother me. I wish I was as young as you two again and had your, well...But the others around here, they might not take so kindly to it. And the way neighbors gossip...Well, I'm sure you understand...

Karen stared at the unwanted neighbor on her doorstep, speechless, her lips parted. Pale lips devoid of the red gloss she'd worn to the funeral.

—Anyway, I wanted you to have these...Don't worry about the pot. Just bring it back at your convenience. And keep in mind how...how sound travels around here. Oh! This must be your husband!

Minus had put his funeral clothes back on, though his advancing feet were bare. He stopped. Looked at Karen. Looked at the woman. Looked at the toweled crockpot she was holding out to him.

—Oh, no, Minus hastened to say, —I'm her brother.