The Switch

Fictional. Stepdad, stepdaughter.

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Dr. Harlan scribbled something on her notebook. I paused briefly, then finished what i had been saying. "...well, when he did that it made me feel horrible, like...like he doesn't trust me. James is just a friend and I told him he had nothing to worry about." Was I complaining too much about my boyfriend Blake? Lately it seemed like we'd been going through a rough patch. Arguing more. Not trusting each other.

This most recent argument of ours centered on one of my guyfriends, James. While Blake was reaching for his phone on the nightstand, he had accidentally grabbed mine. Saw a text from James. It was nothing sexual or inappropriate. He had just wanted to know if I was still hanging out with him that Saturday to play some videogames and help him fix his computer. However, my boyfriend almost flipped out right away. "Are we still good for Saturday at 4? Let me know, James," Blake read outloud. He hesitated. "Who is James?"

I sighed. Felt anger rise within me. "I've spoken to you about him before," I reminded him. "James is a friend of mine. We went to college together." Blake got quiet.

"Why haven't I met your guyfriends? I've introduced you to mine..." he pointed out. It was like he was being super critical of me-& I hated when he was like that. I snatched my phone from him. Texted James back quickly. "I've been busy lately with work, but you'll meet them soon," I promised.

I soon realized my therapist was staring at me. Dr. Harlan had finished writing her notes. I blushed. Had she just asked me a question? Had I tuned her out just now? "I think you're in a dysfunctional relationship, Mallory," she replied finally. I relaxed slightly, but a part of me was still on edge. My throat went dry.

"But it's not like Blake abuses me," I stated.

Dr. Harlan sighed. "But he makes you feel bad about yourself, doesn't he? What about that time he made fun of your forest painting?"

I cringed while I remembered. She'd hit a weak spot. I clenched my fists. "He knows how important I take my artwork, how much time and effort I put into them...he didn't have to be critical of my work," I blurted out.

"Exactly," she agreed. "I just think you should really think about how you mostly feel around him. Do you feel loved and protected? Supported? Or not so much?"

I glanced at the clock above her head. It was two minutes after 5. I let her know. She kept staring at me. "But how do I fix him?" I asked without really thinking. "You can't. You can try to improve the relationship, but you can't fix someone else without their effort," she explained. She paused. "What do you want to fix most specifically in the relationship?"

I thought about it. "The intimacy."

"You want to feel closer to him? Try a new fun experience together, or maybe take a class together." She jotted down some more notes. "That's our session..." and she politely shut down our session for that day.

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Work became a bit hectic the next few days, due to some new employees joining the team. Also Taylor had quit, which sucked since she was moving. She'd been so much fun and so nice. While I helped Monica fold some shirts and clean out the fitting rooms towards the end of our shift, I let my mind wander.

"So then..." she was rambling on about her weekend. About a party she went to. I nodded occasionally, but really I just wanted to go home. My feet were killing me. Also, I didn't go to parties. I didn't care about her story. What could my boyfriend and I do to bring us closer together? To spice up our relationship? A baby crying nearby brought me back to reality briefly. Glancing over, I saw a couple walk past me with a stroller. Behind them were a group of teenagers. 2 girls & 1 guy. They looked like they were laughing at a joke or something. I turned back to my shirt folding. A naughty idea suddenly popped into my mind: threesome.

I'd never done it before. I don't think Blake had either, but maybe it would make us closer?

I didn't want to spend tons of money on relationship counseling. Or what class should he and I take together? We didn't have much in common.

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Later that night, after I got home from work, as soon as I stepped into the hall, I saw a woman on top of my stepdad. They still had their clothes on, luckily. They quickly jumped and stopped. I studied the woman.

Probably early to mid-thirties, blonde hair, and blue eyes. I sighed. I wished my sex life was better, not just the relationship aspect.

"Oh hey this is Jane," my stepdad Derek said.

Jane fixed her messy hair a bit and smiled at me. "I've heard so much about you," she greeted. Held out her hand. I stared at it uncomfortably. She blushed then withdrew her hand. "I'll umm...go get us more wine darling," she told my stepdad then vanished into the kitchen.

I plopped down across from my stepdad on the blue couch. "What happened to Laura?" I asked. My stepdad sighed.

"We're over. She met someone else," he said. Took a swig of wine.

"Oh I'm sorry. You'll find the right woman, old sport," I reassured him. (The Great Gatsby is a favorite book of ours).

My stepdad chuckled slightly. Ran a hand through his dark black hair. He looked a bit tired, but buzzed. His green eyes were swimming with delight. He suddenly reminded me of a giddy boy with a bunch of Halloween candy. It was very cute. I smiled. "You might want to plug in your headphones tonight," he grinned. "and turn the music up loud."

I stopped smiling. I was so tired. A bit jealous. I got up. My stepdad drank some more wine, happily. I escaped to my bedroom and closed the door. Laid on my bed. Thought about my boyfriend. I sent him a "miss you" text. Thought about my stepdad with his new girlfriend. He was a very sweet guy and attractive-I hope she treats him well. He never was in a long serious relationship, after my mom died 6 years ago, when I was 17. Mostly casual flings since then.

My phone rang suddenly. One of my girl friends, Allison. She wanted to hang out soon, maybe go out to a bar or a nightclub.

"What about Blake?" I teased.

She didn't like him. "You're still with him?"

"Yeah," I replied. She didn't say anything for awhile. "You still there?"

"Yes, sorry. I was just thinking...maybe try something new with him in the bedroom? You mentioned your relationship has gotten kind of boring, lately," she suggested. I had told her that, but I told her almost everything. We'd been friends since the fifth grade. "I think I will do that," I replied.

"Try renting a porn movie...or go to Lover's Lane? They probably have sexy outfits there too." Something beautiful clicked on in my brain. I smiled. "Allison, you're a genius!" I exclaimed. "Umm ...ok," she laughed a bit. I had never tried wearing a sexy outfit for Blake or role playing, but maybe it would spice up our stale relationship? I mean, it sounded really fun!

The rest of the night I spent trying to sleep and trying to ignore the moans and other sounds of my stepdad getting banged in the next room.