The Sebastian Files: Sofia

SOFIA: Three weeks ago I had a visit from my mother. She wanted to discuss her plan to have an affair with my brother. She also told me my father wanted to have an affair with me.

SEBASTIAN: Let's slow down for a moment. These are your biological parents, for both you and your brother?

SOFIA: Correct.

SEBASTIAN: And by affair, do you mean a sexual relationship?

SOFIA: Yes.

SEBASTIAN: How old are your parents?

SOFIA: They're both thirty-nine.

SEBASTIAN: And how old are you and your brother?

SOFIA: I'm twenty-one, he's twenty.

SEBASTIAN: Very good. When your mother discussed this with you, did you have any indication that this situation might occur?

SOFIA: No, not at all. I haven't experienced or seen any inappropriate sexual behavior from anybody in my family, not even remotely.

SEBASTIAN: How did you react when she told you?

SOFIA: I had so many questions. It was such a strange conversation. I just wanted to understand what was going on.

SEBASTIAN: And what did you learn?

SOFIA: First of all, you should know that at the same time my mother was talking to me, my father was talking to my brother, telling him the same things.

SEBASTIAN: Interesting. So they coordinated.

SOFIA: Yes.

SEBASTIAN: How long had they planned this?

SOFIA: I'm not sure. My mother admitted that they've had an interest in incest—an incest fetish, they called it—for quite a while, but only imaginary incest, shared between themselves, with no desire to act out these fantasies in real life.

SEBASTIAN: That's common enough. I assume they role-played their proclivities, and this kept them satisfied.

SOFIA: That's exactly what she said. But something changed, apparently, when my brother and I became adults. They started to see a new possibility. They debated the idea for a long time and ultimately decided to approach us with this proposition.

SEBASTIAN: Now normally, this kind of decision rests on an intuitive sense of what the reaction will be. Because otherwise, if they had no idea how you would react, the risk would be too great, the fallout could be catastrophic. So were they correct in thinking that you would not react negatively?

SOFIA: I suppose so. I was surprised, of course, and puzzled, and really, just curious about how this came about.

SEBASTIAN: Did it help that it was your mother talking to you and not your father?

SOFIA: Oh, definitely. It would have been too much coming from him.

SEBASTIAN: What did you say to your mother?

SOFIA: Like I said, I had so many questions. We talked for a long time. It was... interesting.

SEBASTIAN: Was it awkward?

SOFIA: It wasn't so bad. We talked about these relationships in a hypothetical sense, so it wasn't that stressful. I felt like my mother's relationship with my brother didn't really concern me, so I could look at that objectively. Talking about my father, that was a little uncomfortable. But eventually I felt like I understood the situation, and I told her I'd have to think about it. Which she was expecting, because she suggested a one month waiting period before discussing it again.

SEBASTIAN: So you haven't talked to her about it since that day.

SOFIA: I haven't had any communication with either my parents since then, as we agreed.

SEBASTIAN: When you told her that you'd think about it, what was your state of mind?

SOFIA: I was... a little perplexed. I truly had to take some time to think about it. I couldn't give my mother a definitive answer just then.

SEBASTIAN: You didn't automatically reject the proposition, so you must have had some level of interest. And you didn't immediately accept the proposition, so you must have had some doubts.

SOFIA: That's basically it, yes.

SEBASTIAN: What was your brother's reaction after your father talked to him?

SOFIA: He said yes right away.

SEBASTIAN: Right away?

SOFIA: He asked a lot of questions too, but it turns out my brother also has an interest in incest. He had no idea that our parents had the same interest. He was surprised and pleased. He had already developed fantasies about our mother.

SEBASTIAN: So you've discussed this with your brother.

SOFIA: A couple times.

SEBASTIAN: Had he developed fantasies about you too?

SOFIA: I don't know. He didn't say. It crossed my mind that he had, but I doubt it.

SEBASTIAN: Has he tried to persuade you to try incest with your father?

SOFIA: Indirectly. He talks a lot about how great the sex is with our mother.

SEBASTIAN: Oh, they already started?

SOFIA: He was offered the one month waiting period too, but he wanted to start right away. And apparently their relationship is working out very well.

SEBASTIAN: Does that affect your decision?

SOFIA: Somewhat.

SEBASTIAN: Have you made a decision?

SOFIA: I wish I could say that I'm still thinking about it, but really, from the moment my mother first introduced this idea, it seems inevitable that I would say yes.

SEBASTIAN: But you have a choice.

SOFIA: Yes, I know.

SEBASTIAN: If you have any misgivings at all, you should not accept this proposition. If this isn't a fully consensual relationship, real harm will occur.

SOFIA: I'm not being forced into this in any way, Dr. Sebastian. What I meant by inevitable is that I feel like something has been awakened in me. There is something about this that I'd like to explore.

SEBASTIAN: Have you ever had incestuous thoughts before?

SOFIA: No. And apparently I'm the only one in my family who hasn't. Isn't that strange?

SEBASTIAN: I've observed families with tendencies toward incest, but it's rare, and only occurs under certain circumstances. I don't believe it's an inheritable trait.

SOFIA: But why am I not disturbed by the idea of having sex with my father? Does that mean I've always been predisposed toward incest?

SEBASTIAN: It's possible that your incestuous feelings have been lying dormant, waiting for a trigger. It's also possible that your mother presented this proposition in such a way that it bypassed your normal defenses. And it may be that your temperament allows you to analyze the situation without letting your emotions get the better of you.

SOFIA: I see.

SEBASTIAN: Describe your father.

SOFIA: Very smart, very handsome. I could say that he's the ideal man. But it can't be that simple.

SEBASTIAN: No. But it's a start.

SOFIA: The main thing that's holding me back is that I don't understand what's happening. Why do I want to have sex with my father? Why does he want to have sex with me? What is going on with my family? I was told you're one of leading experts in the world on incest. I was hoping you'd help me understand.

SEBASTIAN: That will take time. I'm afraid that adult consensual incest is difficult to understand—there are so many factors involved, and there is so much of this world that remains hidden. That's why I'm always so grateful that people such as yourself are willing to tell me their experiences and add to the research.

SOFIA: Have you ever heard of a case like mine?

SEBASTIAN: No, not exactly. But others have been in situations similar to yours, and many of them have found a deep and profound insight that has transformed their lives. Incest can be an opportunity for enormous happiness, if you approach it properly. I can help guide you. If you're willing to examine this thoroughly, and if you're willing to take some chances, you could possibly discover something extraordinary.