I was only ten when my father left us. I was gutted! I loved him so much. We had such great fun together. He was my idol. When he left I couldn't stop weeping. I never saw him again as I grew up. He never called or wrote. I was terribly mixed up. My mother and gran brought me up to hate him. Gran wouldn't have his name even mentioned in the house and insisted that I should never forgive him for what he did to me. But I missed him so!
I went to Music College and became a concert violinist. Middle of the road artist. I met loads of other good musicians and we had lots of good times. I settled down with one of them – a pianist – but I always had this chip on my shoulder. Mum didn't say much about dad when I asked. He'd just disappeared off the face of the earth as far as I was concerned. A psychiatric friend said it was sometimes better for the child to believe her father dead. Well, he certainly was as far as I was concerned.
When I was thirty-two I took a job for the summer, playing in an orchestra which was based the Midlands. I found out from a mutual friend from the old days that my father was living nearby with his second wife and two children. Brothers and sisters I had never met. After a lot of soul searching I decided to meet him. To confront him. It took a hell of a lot of guts to go through with it. After twenty-two years. What could we find to say to each other?
We met in a café in a park, where we had a cup of tea. It was weird! Then we had another. But I gradually learned that he had not abandoned me at all. He was barred. Barred from speaking to me and any letters and cards were returned to him by Mum's solicitors. There was no automatic right of access to children in those days. The solicitors asked him not to write again. They said it would only upset me! Upset? I never even knew he tried to see me or get in touch, for goodness sake! We were being kept apart because gran thought him a rat.
The upshot was that I realised all wasn't his fault. I had been denied seeing him and my new family by my mother and gran. Gran was now dead, but I decided not to tell mum I'd got in touch with him. It would need too many explanations. Besides, she was as much to blame as he was for the breakdown of the marriage.
So I went for meals with father and his second wife. Met my half brother and sister. We all got on fine. In fact, father and I spent all our free time together, going places, holding hands. We shopped together; I joined them for supper after concerts.
It was like a love affair! Catching up with all that love and affection we'd both missed out on.
One day, we were sat together on the settee, holding hands, as we often did, chatting away about our lost years. We'd had a few glasses of wine, so there was lots of laughter between us as we remembered some of the silly things we did together, games we played in the garden when I was but a girl. We turned to face each other. Our smiling eyes met and held each other for a few seconds. Then they turned serious. I leaned over and kissed him fully on the lips.
'Hmmm! I've wanted to do that for a long time,' I sighed. 'For twenty-two years!' and I laughed.
'Me too,' he replied. 'You'll never know how much.'
Our faces were still close to each other, gazing into the other's eyes. He pressed his lips to mine and we kissed again. This time, with closed eyes, more fervently. As the kiss lingered, dad put his left arm round my neck and we drew each other into a proper lovers' clinch. I was in seventh heaven. I snuggled in close to him. I felt the protection I'd missed all during those years. And I was getting my own back on my mum for keeping me away from my father for so long.
It seemed the natural thing for him to put his hand over my left tit, stroking and squeezing as we kissed, as lovers do. I didn't try to stop him. In fact, I wanted him to feel me, cuddle and fondle me, his long lost daughter.
'I missed you growing up. Thought about you an awful lot, you know. Did you have many boyfriends?' he asked me.
'Oh ... Quite a few. I was something of a tearaway as a teenager, I'm afraid. Mum and gran couldn't control me. I think I was searching for you, really. Most of the lads I went with tended to be a bit older. They groped me and I would toss them off. One or two of the nice ones I allowed to fuck me.'
'Took after your mum, then!' He laughed.
'Did you fuck mum a lot? Was she very sexy? Was she good?' I asked casually.
He laughed at the forthright question.
'Two or three times a week, I seem to remember. Until she got herself involved with other men, that is. At first, we just did it. You know ... there was no clever stuff.'
'What did you do when she went astray?'
'I found myself a mistress. Pauline. She seemed very quiet and staid, but I found out that she was sex mad. We fucked two or three times a day whenever we could – then I'd go home late and fuck your mother – who had probably already had it from her lover.'
'That's a lot of action,' I laughed. Then suddenly asked, 'will you play with my tits properly? I'd like you to.'
It was a spur of the moment thing. I wanted him to feel my tits. Gaze at my body, as lovers do! So I broke away from him, unbuttoned my blouse and unclasped the bra. Fortunately, I was wearing a front fastening sort. My tits literally fell out. He stared down at them in almost disbelief. But I took hold of his head and pressed it down to the nipple. He latched onto it and suckled and fondled the large bag of flesh. It was utterly wonderful to have my dad feeling my flesh. We were part of each other again.
I have big tits, but they're sloppy! They just hang like bags of flesh with large blotchy areolas and dark chocolaty-coloured wrinkled nipples. But I love to have them squeezed and caressed. I enjoy them being kissed as well. And that's what he was doing.
There was one other thing I wanted more than anything at that moment. To see and to play with the cock that had been my mother's toy for many years. To take from her that memory of father's cock. So, as he paid close attention to my left tit, I managed to unbuckle his waistband and unzip his flies. I felt his cock inside there, fully erect. It felt wonderful! Then it came into view. It wanted me!! Hard and stiff. I dragged it out of his underpants. It wasn't enormous, or anything like that. A little above average perhaps – just over six inches, and fairly thick, but it was really beautiful! Pale, straight and smooth. I stared at its proud stiffness. It was love at first sight. I never knew anyone could fall in love with an object – a cock. It was incredible. It was as if it had a life all of its own.
Pushing him away from my tit, I bent down to take a closer look. To worship it. Make love to it. To taste it. To take the idol between my lips. Wow! I loved it! Studying every bit if skin, the floppy foreskin. I licked it all over, fondled the wrinkled balls. I was over the moon with joy. I was sucking on the cock that had fucked mother! It was now mine. I had stolen it for myself. I knew then that I just had to have it inside me.
'You have boobs just like your mother,' he said quietly. 'Lots of flesh but very little muscle to keep them upright! Plenty to play with, though! With those big, big brown areolas and sagging nipples.'
As I shrugged out of my blouse and bra, I slid onto the floor between his legs, pulling his trousers and underpants down to his ankles. The full glory of his gorgeous genitals were in front of me. I didn't care what he thought of me – I just wanted to feel him. Be close to him. Smell him.