Mum was twenty years old when she had me, thirty-two years old when she fell pregnant a second time. My parents were both educated professionals. Dad worked in finance and provided a comfortable lifestyle, despite what he was doing on the side. Maybe it was a guilty conscience? Mum was a lawyer and, after giving birth to me, had spent two years raising me before returning to work. I probably spent more time with my grandparents than my parents most of the time. I knew Mum hated being apart from me. We always had breakfast together before she drove me to school, but I spent the afternoons at my grandparents, my grandmother collecting me as she didn't work. As for my father, I usually only saw him an hour or so during the week before I went to bed, and usually on the weekends, depending on his plans.
She noticed straight away I was doing what I could to help her. I was excited at the idea of having a younger brother or sister. Most of my friends had siblings, generally closer in age, but it meant they had company at home, at least. I'd found growing up a little isolating at times, though Mum had obviously done her best, ensuring she spent nearly all weekend keeping my company, even though I knew she was tired.
I think we were both surprised when she sat me down and told me that not only was she going to have a daughter, she was going to have twin daughters. I thought that was so cool, and the fact I was even more excited made Mum cry again. She hugged me for what felt like hours, hearing her mutter that at least one male in the house was excited.
Even I felt the distance between my parents during the pregnancy. Dad was coming home later and any affection Mum had for him was definitely on me and her unborn twins by now. She was still hard at work with her job, but she explained to me things like maternity leave, and that once she'd given birth, she'd be home for nearly a year before she would go back to work, adding it would only be part-time until the kids were at school. She was surprised her firm agreed, but they didn't want to lose her.
"What about Dad?" I asked one night at dinner, Mum now looking quite large. Considering she was only around five-foot-five, she had a big belly by now. I would sit next to her occasionally, taking my hand and placing it on her belly to feel the babies kicking. I'd chuckle and it felt like my future siblings giving me a high five.
"Don't worry about your father, Mark."
I looked down at my dinner plate, playing with my food. "Mum... It feels like he doesn't care about me anymore..."
I heard her chair scrape and I was soon wrapped in a hug. We both had a little cry. Then it kicked off that night once I went to bed. I heard raised voices, sneaking out of my room as they were in the dining room once again. "Your own son has picked up on it, Michael!"
"I didn't mind having him, Cathy. I do love my son, never doubt that. But I didn't plan nor want another two children."
"You were the one that wanted sex that night."
"I thought you were..."
"Could have worn a fucking condom or pulled out, Michael! Considering however many fucking women you're probably with nowadays, I should probably get myself tested."
"Not like you want to fuck me anyway! I'm surprised I could even get it up for you that night!"
Silence. Interminable silence. Then I heard Mum crying. "You fucking bastard," she sobbed, "I've given you some of the best years of my life and all you've done is cheat on me at every turn."
That's when I appeared in the doorway. "Mum?" I whispered before I walked to cuddle into her.
Dad got to his feet. "You know what? I'm done. It's obvious this marriage is over. I've already put things into place in the event this arrangement grew intolerable. I'll be moving out over the weekend. Keep the fucking house. Do what you need to do otherwise. I know I'm going to get fucked in court."
He walked towards his bedroom. "Dad?" I asked.
He was man enough to turn back and look at me. The sadness appeared genuine. "Sorry, son. We did agree for you not to get in the middle nor see this. But we're obviously not happy. You're old enough to understand now. I'm still your father, but I also need to be happy too."
Dad moved out that weekend. All he took were his clothes and a few other things. Mum did ask where he was going. When he told her a name, I'd never seen Mum blow up in anger like she did, screaming at him to get out and go. She then slammed the door and collapsed to the floor. I'd never heard her sob like it. I gave her a hug on the floor. I was only twelve, but I'd done a lot of reading and Mum had explained the changes that would take place. "The babies, Mum," I whispered.
"They'll be okay. They'll be eager to meet their brother soon enough," she managed to say.
Mum gave birth to twin girls two months later. Dad wasn't at the hospital so my grandparents took me. Once the birth was complete and Mum was in recovery, I was taken in to see them the first time. She was holding one in each arm. Despite having just gone through labour and everything that went with it, and Mum hadn't held back in explaining, she looked positively radiant.
Standing next to her bed, she smiled at me. "Mark, I'd like you to meet your sisters," she said softly, "They're identical. The little girl in my left arm is Rebecca, and the little girl in my right arm is Natalie. Girls, this is your older brother, Mark. He's the one who will help guide you through life."
I'd never felt such a surge of feeling and responsibility in my short life until that moment. I now understood how all my friends felt about their younger siblings. My best friend had a sister two years younger and he protected her fiercely. Another had an older sister and he was just the same with her. Same for a couple of female friends with younger siblings.
I entered my teenage years with Mum at home full-time taking care of two babies. With Dad not around, I did what I could to help out. Mum didn't have to ask, I wanted to help. My grandfather would come around to help maintain the house and yards. Every time, I'd head outside to help him. He'd ruffle my hair, call me a good kid. "I've got to help Mum," I said, "Not like Dad..."
"Yeah. Less said, the better about that..."
I helped Mum with my sisters where I could. I learned how to change a nappy, though dealing with number twos wasn't pleasant. Mum breastfed them but she'd fill bottles and show me how to feed them too. I'd happily lie in the room with them as they napped and just watch them
Mum and Dad officially divorced by the time I was fourteen. She kept the house and received child support for three kids. Considering my father made a lot of money, and Mum had received sole custody of the three children, she received enough money that she sat me down and explained that she would work part-time until my sisters were at school.
"You'll be seventeen by then, Mark. Becoming your own man but I'm hoping..." She looked awkward. "I know you're still young, but I know your sisters would love you to stay for a while after you enter adulthood."
"I'm still only fourteen, Mum, but I promise right now I'm not going anywhere."
Mum was more than aware that I was not into what I called 'book learning'. Sure, I liked reading, and learning new things, but the idea of going to university never appealed. My grandfather picked up on my interest in vehicles, and after a few conversations with him, I sat down with Mum during my fourth year in high school. I was sixteen and exams were only a couple of months away.
Dinner had been eaten, the plates cleared away. My little sisters were already in bed asleep. Mum was tired after a long day at work but would always take time to sit and listen to any idea I had. "I want to finish high school after these exams," I said, "I've already applied for a number of apprenticeships. Once I start making money, I can contribute things like money towards the bills."
Mum smiled at me, taking my hand in hers. "Mark, you've been a responsible young man since I came home with your sisters. But don't you have hope and dreams?"
"Of course. I want to be a mechanic. Grandad and I have already bought a beat up old car..."
"Mark, I'm more than aware. I'll be honest, I thought it was just a hobby. But if you're serious, I'm not going to force you to stay at school beyond what is legal."
I grinned. "You won't?"
"It's your life, Mark. And even I can admit that you're good with your hands..." She paused and cleared her throat. "Around the house. Certainly done more to keep this place ship-shape than your father."
Less said about that man, the better. I'd long stopped visiting him during the customary visitation. He never even bothered forming any sort of bond with the twins, though Mum had made sure his name was on the birth certificate. She wasn't going to let him get away with bullshit. I spoke to him every so often on the phone, but he'd married the woman he was having an affair with, and I never attempted a relationship with her. Didn't trust myself to hold my tongue about her contributing to destroying my parents' marriage. She knew he was married and didn't care.
