The Joe's on You

I walked past my younger brother's room. He was in there, staring at that picture of Melissa Morgan again, that picture taken from the little shrine he had in his closet of her. I swear, he was obsessed with that self-centered bitch. I couldn't stand her, but what did I know? I was just his big sister, his twin, actually. I clearly knew nothing when it came to women. Our mom and dad were out of town for the weekend for their anniversary, so it was just us, and you'd think he'd talk to me about his problems, but no. He was just a stubborn ass.

My name is Angela Heady, typical white girl, twenty-three, with shoulder-length, straight brown hair and brown eyes, same as every other girl out there...Only I'm not. I'm actually intelligent, unlike the stupid bitches that I have to put up with online. I'm also a hottie in my own right, at least I think so. I have a gorgeous face as far as I'm concerned, round cheeks, pert, sultry lips, perfect nose...Yeah, I was good-looking. I was only a little overweight, by about ten pounds, five-foot three and a hundred and fifty-three pounds...I liked to eat sweets now and then, snack-cakes, that sort of thing. It's a bad habit. Even so, I had a gorgeous butt and D-sized breasts, so I was still quite fuckable.

My younger brother, Joshua, however, was only younger than me by about a minute. He was five-ten, broad-shouldered, with good muscle from working out at the gym, same brown eyes as myself, short brown hair in a jock-cut...He was cute in his own way. He was a dumbass, though, when it came to women. My best friend, Alison, was clearly the one for him. He needed to stop pining over Melissa Morgan and move on. It's been five fucking years since they broke up. Jesus.

My best friend, Alison Barstow, was a dyed-blonde, with straight hair just a little shorter than mine, a pretty face and a wide smile, beautiful blue eyes, and she was only a little overweight like me. She had the exact same body type as I, right down to the same sized breasts and hips. She was a beauty just like me, and she was right in front of Josh's face, had suffered a crush on him for ten years, but, no...He was blind when it came to real women. Well, the joke's on him, because Alison and I have a plan that's going to turn him around...You'll see.

Now my brother's best friend? Mac Renner? That's the man for me. Mac was a muscle-jock just like my brother, and they'd been friends since the fifth grade. Mac was six-foot, muscular, a not too wide, not too thin twenty-three-year-old white boy with the dreamiest face you could imagine...Blue eyes, dark-brown hair, just to die for...and this is coming from someone who doesn't use a thirteen-year-old's description like 'dreamiest'. That was the best word to describe Mac, though.

Every time I saw Mac, I would flirt with him, joke about taking a roll in the hay with him, but he always just laughed it off...I don't know if he just thought I was ugly or if he was just afraid to fuck his best friend's twin sister. Whatever the case, I always ended up taking a lonely rub in the shower afterwards, because...Mac just had that effect on me.

Enough is enough, though. Alison and I are tired of being alone, and we have the two perfect guys for us right in front of us, so now we have a plan. That plan is a complicated one, so I'll explain it in detail in a moment, but first, some back story.

All four of us are working outside of college, because...I just didn't think I was ready for that yet. Josh and I work for our mom and dad at the lumberyard, and we live with our beloved if out of touch parents (still), but neither one of us have enough money saved to live on our own, so...you get the picture.

Alison rooms with two other girls, and she works days part time at a convenience store and nights as a waitress at the Grill and Spill Pub and Restaurant across town. Mac works there sometimes as a bartender, but his main job is at the lumberyard with Josh and I.

So we all practically lived together, anyway. Why couldn't we just hook up with each other? It made perfect sense to me, but Mac and my brother were either stupid or just oblivious. They always talked about looking for pussy, roamed other bars than the Grill and Spill trying to pick up college girls, and sometimes they did, but...the last time I checked, both Alison and I had pussies in our pants...It's not fair.

If I could just unzip Mac's pants and take his...into my...Urg! I'm so sexually frustrated! Other girls (some acquaintances I have online) have told me to move on, but they're a bunch of dumb bitches that can rot in Hell, for all I care. Correcting my spelling and grammar...Hate them like you wouldn't believe. One of them even told me that Mac was out of my league, but that's not true...I know it isn't. Well, the joke's on her, because Alison and I have devised a plan to get laid by our crushes...and it's a good one.

The stage is already set, in fact. Alison got her roommate, Jessie, to let slip a rumor to Mac about a glory house where horny men and women can hook up in secret, never seeing each other's faces. Thing is, it's not a rumor. I know, because I've been there...I haven't actually 'been' there, but I've been inside there because of Alison. It's in the city, and it's run by Alison's uncle. Alison's Uncle Joe is the black sheep of her family, mainly because he owns and operates an illegal glory house. It's called The Devil's Horns, and a lot of people go there. The police know about it, but Joe pays them off...plus, a lot of them go there, too, even the women.

Thanks to Alison sending her roommate, Jessie, to the Grill and Spill while Mac was bartending, now he and my brother are planning to go to the Devil's Horns...tonight. Mac was already friends with Jessie, so any story she gave him was a feasible one. Both Mac and Josh already have the hundred-dollar entry fee...as do Alison and I.

Neither one of them know that Alison's uncle runs the place, and neither one of them know that Alison's Uncle Joe is going to 'set things up' for us. Oh, yeah, I'm finally going to get Mac's beautiful cock in my mouth and pussy, and Alison is finally going to fulfill her own fantasies with my brother. It may seem a little wrong for me to talk about getting my brother laid, but...he's an idiot for not seeing how great Alison is. He just thinks he's soooo smart. Pisses me off so much sometimes.

Aside from that, it made sense to do it tonight, because Mom and Dad were out of town for the weekend, off celebrating their anniversary, so now was the right time to go out and fulfill our dreams. We were going to play those two blind idiots for fools, and Alison and I were finally going to get what we deserved.

But enough exposition. On with the real story.

I just shook my head as Josh looked longingly down at that old picture of Melissa Morgan. I knew he had a shrine in his closet to her, though I'd never actually seen what was inside his closet, but...I didn't need to. I'd seen glimpses of the photos on the back wall in there, so I knew he had his little crush closet where he goes to yank off. I did my private time in the shower, but whatever. Apparently, Josh was a little more old-fashioned in that department.

Today Josh was wearing a black T with the white letters 'LUCKY' across the chest, and he had on his dark blue jeans, red dress socks, and brown dress shoes, an odd combination to wear for going out to a 'glory house'. His choices in clothing always confounded me, but that was just one more thing to shake my head at.

But that didn't matter. What mattered was that Alison and I needed to book it to the city and beat our crushes to the Devil's Horns, so I went into my room to grab my purse. Alison was driving, and she was picking me up, so I had to make sure I was ready.

I grabbed my purse and phone and walked to the upstairs bathroom, but Josh exited his room at that moment. He looked me over and then gave me a curious stare.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

I decided to be clever in my response.

"Out with Alison," I grinned. "We've got a couple of hot guys lined up for a double date."

"Oh, really?" asked Josh in surprise. "Do I know them?"

"I'm not answering that!" I giggled as I entered the bathroom and shut the door.

Today I was wearing my green sweater along with my own blue jeans, white crew socks, and white sneakers. It was an easy and relaxed look to go out looking for some even easier fun, and it was also something that was quick to get in and out of.

I was shaking with excitement as I fixed my hair and applied my lipstick. I rarely wore makeup, especially lipstick, but I thought it would be some great evidence to show to Mac when I explained that I was the one who had sucked his dick. The look on his face was going to be awesome, because I was going to give him the best head in the entire fucking universe before I took his throbbing cock into my wet pussy. Oh, yeah, I was a horny little slut at the moment, but I didn't care. I was finally going to get laid after so long, and it was going to be with my dream crush, so I figured I had a right to be crude...for now, anyway.

I rushed downstairs to meet up with Alison, but I didn't have to wait for long. She was actually at the door when I made it into the living room. She was dressed in a pink and white long-sleeve, that cute shirt matched with stonewashed jeans, white ankle socks, and denim shoes. She had on lipstick, too, and I could tell that she was just as ready as I was to get ourselves away from here and out to the fun.

"Come on!" I said in an excited rush as I pushed her back from the doorway. "They're getting ready!...At least, Josh is."

Alison gave me an excited giggle as we practically sprinted to her little white compact. We were going to beat Mac and my brother to the Devil's Horns, and then the magic would happen.

And we did. There was no sign of Mac's red truck when we hit the pavement of the Devil's Horns parking lot in the shitty part of town we were in. Yeah, we were neck deep in the worst part of the city, but I wasn't worried. Alison's Uncle Joe had a lot of hired muscle here, so we were safe for the most part. Plus, I wasn't going to turn chicken and run now. That was NOT going to happen. Not when both Allie and I were so close.

We entered through the blue door at the back of this unassuming three-story brick building that housed the Devil's Horns. Everyone else went through the red door at the front, but we weren't everyone else. For one thing, Alison had a key to the 'employee's entrance'. It was one of the perks of being related to the owner of this illegal establishment.

A couple of big bouncers nodded and smiled at Alison as we walked past them down a short hallway and into her uncle's office. Alison's Uncle Joe was a tall balding guy with a strip of brown hair around his head that ended in a long pony tail in the back. He had on a purple silk shirt and black slacks with gold rings on his fingers and gold chains around his neck. I'd never met him, but he honest to God reminded me every pimp I'd ever seen in the movies. Still, I wasn't going to chicken out. Not now that I was actually here.

"Eeeeey!" grinned Alison's Uncle Joe. "You made it! I didn't think you were going to go through with it."

"I wouldn't miss this for the world," grinned Alison in return.

Her Uncle Joe gave her a serious look.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked in audible concern. "I may not be the best uncle, but you are my niece, and I don't want you to get hurt..."

Alison gave him a distinct look of irritation and waved him off.

"This boy...errr...This 'man' is the man I want to marry," she said firmly.

"I don't know, Allie," said Uncle Joe. "If he's coming here...that doesn't say much for him, does it?"

"He's Angie's brother," frowned Alison. "She knows him better than anyone."

I interrupted just to put Uncle Joe's fears to rest.

"I know my brother, Sir," I said in a serious tone. "He's just horny, which is why he's coming here, but he's still looking for love...real love. He just hasn't found the right girl. He's just blind when it comes to Allie. I think it's because she's my best friend, and he doesn't want to..."

"Cut down his own trees," nodded Uncle Joe. "Yeah, I getchya."

He smiled at me and offered his hand, so I took it with a firm shake.

"I'm Joe," he grinned. "You must be Angie."

"Yes, Sir," I smiled in return.

"Call me Uncle Joe," said Uncle Joe. "Heck, I'm everybody's uncle here."

"Okay...Uncle Joe," I said as my face turned red.

He just let go of my hand and gave me a loud chuckle.

"I take it you know what I do, then?" he asked.

"Yeah," I nodded. "I have absolutely no problem with it, either."

"I know, right?" asked Uncle Joe. "I'm telling ya, they should just legalize this shit and be done with it. I don't see why it has to be a crime. Nobody's getting mugged or shot or anything, and we don't take underage kids here...I don't do that kind of thing. Heck, we even make sure people turn in proof of a good bill of health before they even see the stairs. Can't have no STDs floating around. I've got a reputation to uphold."

"She knows, Uncle," said Angie with a roll of her blue eyes. "She knows you're a good guy."

Uncle Joe pointed at her, smiled, and gave her a single nod.

"I knew there was a reason you were my favorite," he said in wry humor.

He shook his balding head as if to clear his mind, stepped around his desk, and then waved a hand toward the door of his office.

"Now down to business," he said firmly. "You two have the money?"

"Of course," nodded Angie.

"Keep it," said Uncle Joe as he waved her off. "This one's on me."

"What? Really?" asked Alison in surprise.

"Eeey, you're in love," shrugged Uncle Joe. "Can't fault you for that...Anyway, come on. I'll show you to your rooms."

We followed him out the door to the back stairs, and then the three of us marched all the way up to the third floor. We walked down a long hallway lined with wooden doors here and there, all numbered with large bronze number plates upon them.

"Guys get odd numbers," explained Uncle Joe, "and girls get evens. You undress in there, and then you do your business through the walls separating the accompanying rooms. There's a glory hole, a slider, and a hamster tube in each one."

"Ooookay," said Alison with wide eyes. "I know what one of those is..."

"You know what a glory hole is for, right?" asked Uncle Joe.

We both nodded yes in response. We weren't twelve.

"Okay," he said as he clapped his hands together. "Well, a slider is a cushion type thing kind of like a...an ironing board. You know that board that you iron clothes on? Well it's got a little red curtain across half of it. It's mainly for women, but guys can use it, too. You slide your legs and butt through it so that only your bottom half is showing through the curtain. It's mainly for guys to go down on women, but like I said, guys can use it in case they don't want to use the glory hole or if a woman wants a Sunday ride instead."

"Awesome..." breathed Alison.

Oh, yeah, she was just as excited as I was. I couldn't wait for this, either.

"The hamster tube is a round tunnel in the wall," continued Uncle Joe. "You get on your hands and knees and crawl backwards through it so that your butt and legs are in the other room. It's tunneled so no one can see your face. I'm sure you can figure out what that's for."

"Yeah, we get the picture," said Alison.

"Great!" said Uncle Joe with a clap of his hands. "All right, then. You've got room two, Allie, and Angie gets room four. You go in, get undressed, and flip on the red light. The red light out here means you're ready. Don't worry about some stranger walking in, because you get keys to unlock the doors, and you only get those from the front desk, so it's all good. I'll send up your boys when they get here...Here's the thing, though...Those pictures you gave me? Are they up to date? I don't want to send up a couple of mooks who don't know you from Mary Magdalene."

"They're good," said Alison. "They're this year, anyway."

"Excell-Ent!" grinned Uncle Joe. "Here are your keys, then. You two tigresses get undressed in there, and don't forget to flip on the red lights."

"Got it," grinned Alison in return. "Thanks, Uncle Joe. You have no idea how much this means to both of us."

"I got a pretty good idea," winked Uncle Joe. "Anyway, I gotta get back downstairs...Not a word of this to your mother, though. My sister is not the forgiving type..."

"I know," winced Alison. "Don't worry. We'll take this to our graves."

"Okey dokey," nodded Uncle Joe. "I'll take my leave then. You two ladies have fun."

"Oh, we will," replied Alison with a wide smile.

We watched him walk down the hallway and turn right to head back down the rear stairs. I took that moment to hug Alison, and we both jumped up and down in unfettered joy.

"Let's do this!" I said.

Alison grinned and nodded, and that was all there was to that.

I unlocked door four and walked into the half-apartment that was my temporary room. The walls were a light tan color, the short carpet beneath my shoes was an ugly off orange-brown, and there was a large tan couch in the center of the room along with a knee-high glass table in front of it, but other than that, that was it. There was nothing else in this room.

It was the north wall that held my attention. There they were, the slider on my left closest to the door, the glory hole in the center, and the hamster tube at the far end toward the windowless back wall. Seeing all this made me wet between my legs, and I panted in quick breaths as I felt my lust pick up to the next level.

I sat down on the couch, pulled off my white sneakers and white crew socks, pulled my green sweater up and over me, and undid my bra. I stood back up and pulled off my bra and threw it to the couch, allowing my big D-sized breasts to hang, my big, brick-red nipples in plain view. I took off my jeans and panties and stood naked next to the couch in breathless expectation, excited to the N'th degree.

I reached down and rubbed my bald pussy, my pussy already wet and waiting to take in Mac's cock. I didn't know what his penis looked like, but I'd had plenty of fantasies, so hopefully I wasn't going to be disappointed. I'd shaved just for him, and now that moment was here, so I stroked my stubby little clit and leafy, brick-red hood in hot anticipation of his cock entering all of my holes. I'd even let him fuck me in the ass, but only if he wanted to, and that was saying something. I didn't like anal...Actually, that wasn't true; I was just afraid of it. I was afraid I'd get hurt from it, but I put my fear of it on temporary hold just in case Mac wanted it...I would do it for Mac.

I was so excited that I almost forgot to flip on the red light, so I walked to the wall switch and pressed in the large red button there. A red light above the glory wall lit up, so I knew the outside light was on, too. Now all I had to do was wait, and then Mac would be here to make all of my fantasies come true.

I only waited for twenty minutes, and during that time I laid down on the couch and fingered myself, but not too much...I didn't want to cum yet. I was saving that for Mac.

My heart jumped in my chest as another red light came on right next to the first red light. Mac was finally here.

I stood up from the couch, and my breath caught in my throat as a big, bald, and thoroughly erect penis made its entrance through the glory hole. I practically skipped across the ugly carpet beneath my bare feet as I knelt down before that 'glorious' cock and took it into my right hand.

Mac's cock was even better than my imagination had made it out to be. Mac had shaved just like me, and his bald penis was at least seven inches long and a thick beast, but nothing I couldn't handle. He was circumcised, and his throbbing head was a big round thing that I hungrily took into my willing, wanting mouth. Yeah, I wanted my sausage dinner, and I was going to have it.