"Oh my God, that's disgusting!"
I snapped awake as my sister's voice echoed through the truck. It was about ten at night, Mom was driving, my Grandma was in the passenger seat, and Beth and I were in the back. We had gotten up that morning and were driving from Austin to Las Vegas to watch my aunt Cecilia get married. My truck was the biggest vehicle any of us had that not only had room for us, but for our luggage also. I drove the better part of the day, then Beth, and finally Mom said she'd drive overnight so we didn't have to rent a room. I didn't mind since I'd slept in the back seats before, but what woke me, and cause Mom to swerve along the interstate was my sister's screech.
I looked around to find her with her travel light on staring at me. Apparently, she'd been reading when she saw something that allowed her to overreact.
"Beth, unless someone's dying back there, there is no reason to scream like that," Mom said.
"I can't help it," she said as she stared at me in shock and revulsion.
Grandma, who had been asleep in the passenger's seat, had turned on the overhead light and was looking back with a grin on her face. I wiped my mouth thinking I'd been drooling, but they weren't looking that high up, they were looking down.
"Beth, stop overreacting," Grandma said, "It's just a hard cock."
"Mom," my mother said from the driver's seat, "don't say that."
"Say what? Hard cock? Why not? That's what Alex has, a hard cock."
"Dear God, Mother, you don't have to be so vulgar."
"What would you like me to say, dear?"
"If you must say anything, say penis."
"Hard penis," Grandma said thoughtfully before smirking at me, "doesn't have the same ring to it. Nope, sounds like one of those PSAs from the fifties and sixties." Grandma lowered her voice mimicking a stuffy old man, "See, Suzy, Bobby got a hard penis because he's got a bad case of
Erection
. He got that way because he hates his parents, his school, his country, and God. Side effects of an Erection include the urge to slide a hard penis into something wet and velvety, also mouth-watering and panty wetting in women."
Grandma kept smirking while I laughed and Mom frowned. "Ew, why would anyone want something like that near them," my sister asked.
"Wow, what have you been teaching this girl about sex?"
"I'm sorry I taught my children about abstinence instead of encouraging them to get pregnant and have children before they were out of high school."
"You act like I lined the boys up outside of your room."
"You might as well have with all that talk about how good sex feels, what did you expect me to do?"
"Have some common sense. Yes, I didn't lie to you about sex, but I remember telling you that you could abstain if you wanted or you could use protection if you didn't want to wait. I even offered to get you on birth control, but no, you didn't want anyone to think you were a slut. Guess having the twins showed them, huh?" Grandma looked back at us, "Alex, an erection is a natural thing and you shouldn't get embarrassed for getting them. Beth, an erection is a natural thing and you shouldn't feel disgusted because it gets you excited. Would you want a boy to see you get wet and yell, 'Ew, that's disgusting'?"
"Mom, don't tell the twins that."
"Liza, are you seriously telling me that your twenty-five-year-old twins can't be told their bodies aren't disgusting? Do you want Alex to feel ashamed every time he gets hard? And all you're doing for Beth is making sure she never has a normal sex life with that 'my flower is precious' bullshit."
"Are you saying I shouldn't wait for marriage to have sex," Beth asked.
"Yes," Mom yelled looking into the mirror.
Grandma rolled her eyes, "You just drive. Beth, if you want to save your virginity for marriage then that's what you should do, but don't do it because you were told that sex is something to fear. Do it because you found someone you love and trust. Not someone who's so horny they asked you to marry them for a piece of ass."
"Mom!"
"Well, that's what happened to me and I had to wait until your father died before I found out what good dick was. I mean, I loved him like no one else, but dear God that man only knew how to cram it in and out before he came and went to sleep. Thank goodness he accidentally stuck it in my ass during our first year otherwise I would've had thirty years of just missionary sex."
"Mom!!"
"What? You don't think I should've enjoyed sex? Besides, if he hadn't liked anal so much you'd have a whole liter of siblings instead of just a sister. Yes, he was an in-and-out guy, but he was hard all the time. There were times when I feared our family vacations because I knew he'd want to have his cock in me at every opportunity. There were so many times I begged to suck his dick just to save my ass so much use, but he just wouldn't have it."
"Grandpa didn't like getting his cock sucked?"
"Alex!! Do not encourage your Grandma. Mom, stop talking about your sex life with the kids."
"Twenty-five-year-old adults, and no, Alex, he thought it wasn't proper to stick his cock in the mouth of the mother of his children. Look at me, Alex. Am I so gross that you wouldn't let me suck your cock?"
Holy shit
, I thought,
did Grandma just ask if she could suck my cock? Am I living in the Twilight Zone?
Grandma's smile told me she was serious and I began to wonder how far she'd take this conversation.
I love my Grandma, and even though I couldn't see Grandma behind the passenger seat, all of my friends call her a GILF. Not only would she talk sex to anyone who'd listen, but she was smoking hot for a woman who recently turned sixty.
She was five-five, barely a hundred and ten pounds, and all of that was in her breasts and ass. She moisturized like she'd die if she didn't which made her skin incredibly soft and she loved wearing tight revealing outfits that drove Mom insane, especially when she wore her bikini.
It didn't help Mom's opinion of her Mother that when Grandpa died, Grandma got heavily into yoga and exercise which turned her from a plump granny into a platinum blonde taut body GILF. Then she used some of the inheritance to buy herself what Mom liked to call 'Store Boughts'. I nor my friends nor honestly any other hetero guy on the planet cared that her implants weren't real especially when they were barely covered in her bikini top. Her bikini bottoms were also a source of contention for Mom as Grandma discovered waxing and started wearing a tiny G-String which made our house the place to be on warm days.
"Everyone of my friends thinks of you as a GILF and would love to blow down your throat. Especially if they got to see your breasts."
"They're D cups, dear, and what's a GILF?"
I smiled, "A
Grandma I'd Like to Fuck
."
"Oh my God, Mother, don't tell Alex your cup size, and Alex, don't tell your Grandma that she's a GILF."
"Bite your tongue, he can call me a GILF anytime he wants, and I told you I'd help get you an upgrade from those B cups of yours if you want."
"I'm a natural C cup thank you very much, and I just don't think it's right that he talk to you like that."
"I'm sure he's just playing," I wasn't, and she knew it, but I wasn't going to contradict her, "and even if he wasn't I take it as a compliment that young men as handsome as Alex wants an old broad like me." She winked at me, "If all those young men can all fill a pair of shorts like you, I'd love to meet them."
"Mom!! Don't tell Alex he can fill a pair of shorts."
"Oh my God, Liza, you have to calm down or you're going to have a heart attack. Are you really going to sit there and tell me you don't love all them athletic boys drooling over you?"
"Mom," Mom laughed embarrassed, "I doubt even one of them boys look at me and drool."
"Alex?"
I smiled. Mom was a spitting image of Grandma, a bit younger, but damn near a twin. She was a bit taller, almost my height, with warm chestnut hair and natural C cup breasts. Her stomach wasn't as taut as Grandma's, and her ass was a little bigger. She looked like a hot, thick, soccer Mom.
"Sorry, Mom, you're a MILF and all my friends wanna fuck you too."
She was so stunned to hear a bunch of twenty-something college boys wanted to have sex with her that even in the dim light of the overhead we could see her turning red.
"Don't worry, dear, we're all adults here, we can have adult conversations. Right, kids?"
"Hell yeah," I said enthusiastically.
"Beth?"
"I'm still confused about something." Grandma looked at her expectantly and she said, "I don't get why Grandpa was ok putting his..."
"Cock, dear," Grandma said.
"Cock," Beth whispered before returning to her normal volume. "I don't understand why he was alright putting it in your butt, but not in your mouth."
Grandma laughed, "Well, I wasn't kissing the girls with my asshole, was I?"
"Mom, now that
is
disgusting."
"Fine, but my point is, Grandpa thought it wasn't proper for me to suck his cock and then kiss the girls, or him, so he didn't do it, at least not with me."
"I still don't believe Dad ever cheated on you."
"I'm not saying he wasn't a good man, but all those penicillin shots he told me I had to get wasn't because I sat on the wrong toilets. Thank God he only brought home stuff that could be taken care of with a shot."
"That's another reason why penises are disgusting," Beth said, "You never know which ones are clean."
Again, Grandma rolled her eyes, "You have to use your best judgment, Beth. For example, what if you found a guy like Alex? Would you think he's not clean?"
"I wouldn't know because he's my brother and that's--"
"I know, disgusting. Beth, I really want you to stop hiding behind that little girl wall you've built up and think about what I'm saying. Do you think Alex has any diseases?"
She pouted for a moment and then shook her head. "No, I guess not, but that's because he's a virgin too."
I looked out the window on that one and I could see Grandma's eyebrow raise as I did. "Alex, is that true?"
"Of course, it is, Mother. Alex is a good boy."
"Alex still has a hard cock in his lap and trust me, if these little girls like Beth won't take advantage of that situation, I guarantee an older woman would. So, spill it Alex, who're you fucking?"
I gave her a half-grin, "Mrs. Claiborne and Professor Asher."
"The math professor," Beth asked wide-eyed. "She's Mom's age."
"And Edna's my age," Grandma said. "Do you just not like girls your own age?"
I laughed. "I do, but it's like you said, they're kind of like..." I glanced at Beth who slapped me, "Sorry, but all the girls at school are like you, they don't want to do anything because they're grossed out by everything. They say it's too thick and it hurts."
Grandma's face scrunched, "How big are you?"
