The Folly of Fuck-ups
The next morning Jake was driven by Maxis to the Base with Walsh and Atlas in the back seats. When they drove up to the gate, the security there questioned Jake about them, "Sir, I do not recognize these two gentlemen and I need to see their identifications, please."
Maxis spoke up, "Corporal, we do not have identification cards, we have serial numbers."
The Corporal looked confused, "I'm sorry, I don't understand."
"We are not human. We are security bots put in charge of the Craigg family's protection by Ambassador Harry Walker."
The Corporal laughed, "Bullshit. Prove you are robots."
"You have a metal detector?"
The Corporal nodded yes and went into his guard shack to retrieve it as Maxis and Atlas exited the car, not moving quickly to keep security relaxed. When they were scanned, the detector went off the chart no matter where it was located on their bodies. The Corporal raised an eyebrow just as Maxis added, "Do you have any metal object around you don't mind a bit being melted off of?"
The Corporal laughed, "No, but we have a big ass pine tree that needs removing as it is too close to the fence now. Been a couple months and maintenance has not gotten to it yet."
Atlas asked, "Got a bucket we can fill with water?"
The Corporal proffered a mop bucket and filled it with water as his cohort waived other vehicles through the gate. The pine was approximately 6 feet in diameter and just short of 50 feet tall. Atlas spoke non-verbally to Maxis and they approached the fence line side of the huge pine.
Maxis then activated his right forearm laser and, utilizing one percent power, made a surgical cut halfway through the base of the trunk. Maxis and Atlas then shoved their fingers into the smoking hot cut and lifted, pushing the tree down on its side, parallel to the road, landing with a thunderous crash and cracking limbs that made the ground shudder.
"FUCK ME!" the Corporal exclaimed. He looked over at the shack where his buddy was watching and hollered, "Did you see that shit?"
She nodded her response, "We gotta call the captain for permission to let them on."
Okay, at that moment, Walsh interjected, "Let your Base Commander know to expect a call from the President."
0o0
Chong immediately spoke to Bill during their evening meal, "Mr. President, two security bots, similar to the ones you will be receiving for your army unit, are guarding Jake and Walsh and have been temporarily blocked from entrance onto their base. Would you consider giving the base commander a call, giving them clearance? Their names are Atlas and Maxis."
Bill laughed, "If you have his number, yes. I want eyes on them, reporting to SECDEF, so we can evaluate them in that setting. But do not let the two bots know they are being watched, please?"
I handed Bill my digital console and the Comms officer relayed the call with the number Chong provided him. Bill's side of the conversation was humorous. "Yes General, I understand they are armed and extremely dangerous. That is why they are security bots. It would kinda defeat their purpose if they were not state of the art bad asses!"
"You say they are cutting a 6-foot-wide tree trunk into 2-foot-long pieces and splitting it with their bare hands? Interesting! Have them stack the wood so it can dry a bit and use it for a nice bonfire with the staff!"
"I am absolutely taking this seriously, General! What you don't know, and is need-to-know only, is the U.S. is looking to purchase a few thousand of them and I want in-depth reports of their actions and interactions while they are performing their duties. That is a direct order, General. And send those reports weekly to the Secretary of Defense via secured data link."
"Thank you, General. Oh! And General? Don't piss them off. They may be bots, but they have emotions AND they have a job to do. The two of them could likely take down an entire armored division on their own if they had to protect either Walsh or Major Craigg. Yes, I am very serious. From what I understand they could cut an Abrams X in half before you could shout 'Fuck me!'"
"Yep, no shit, General. These are military grade bots and short of a nuclear bomb, you cannot destroy them. What? Yes, they have emotions. Well, just treat them as honored guests and everything will be fine! Can they... General, they have the full range of human emotions, and they understand the concept of sarcasm in speech. No fucking around with these boys testing out their reactions. We will do that when we begin receiving ours for our new army group. Yes, you can have a psych evaluate them but try not to be too obvious about it. Looking forward to your reports. Goodbye."
0o0
Jake and Walsh had left an hour early, figuring there would be some shit at the gate. Forty minutes after the Corporal called his Captain, the shack got a call on their land line, "Yes, General! Orders understood! They have unlimited access!"
Everyone loaded back up and Maxis dropped Atlas and Walsh off at her building before driving Jake to his.
Jake and Maxis walked into class and Jake approached the light Colonel who was in charge of the classroom, coming to attention and saluting him, waiting for permission to speak.
After returning the salute the LC asked, "Major, who is this person and why are they in my classroom?"
"Colonel, Sir! This is a security robot who has presidential authority to accompany me with full access to the base, Sir! His name is Maxis, and the base commander has been informed of the situation, Sir."
"Major, I know you are a special case. But this is just a bit ridiculous, don't you think?"
"Sir, I suggest you may want to take a moment to get all the details from the base commander. And to be frank, Sir: Even though I had no say in this, my family just survived another attempted assassination. So, it would seem this measure is indeed necessary and appropriate."
The LC sighed, "Very well, Major. Take your seats and I will make a private call to the General. If this makes me look like a fool, your ass is mine."
Jake saluted, "Roger that, Sir. And no bullshit, Sir."
The LC pulled out his cell phone and stepped out to make the call. After a few minutes he stepped back in and began class as if nothing was out of the ordinary.
0o0
Walsh asked, "Atlas you want to teach a class?"
"If you ask, I will. But it may conflict with my mission, and I would prefer to be able to keep my situational awareness at a higher level than would be possible if I did so."
Walsh smiled, "Well, observe then. But are you up for a demonstration if asked?"
"That I could do. But make it advanced students, please. Don't want anyone getting hurt for lack of control or experience in combat style hand-to-hand."
Walsh smiled thinking, *This could be fun!*
0o0
Lunch aboard ship was bittersweet. We were leaving immediately afterwards, and this was a goodbye dinner for Sylvia. We had all said our goodbyes to the Palace staff and most of the women openly wept. The Guard men and women gave us all their deepest respect and appreciation for their training... the Palace Guard now being a force no one would want to take on in close quarters combat.
Most of the dignitaries had left, and Bill and I had met almost all of the NATO members, the Canadian PM being conspicuously absent. I didn't ask, but I suspected Sylvia had let them know they were not invited, having insulted the family the way they did.
I spent some alone time with Sylvia in our master bedroom, cuddling in the nude and just enjoying some emotional closeness before we departed. We were spooning when Sylvia began to cry. "I am going to miss the family so much! Please come back soon!"
I held her close and whispered, "We have weddings to attend in a few months, but I promise we will be back for our baby's birth. And," I said in an even softer whisper, "I intend to give up my ambassadorial position and move to Norway when we return."
Sylvia began weeping openly at that point and asked, "You would do that for me?"
"Yes, my love. You are family now. We would need to spend a few months a year in America, but Sue, Xi and I have discussed it and we all agree. We will all be learning Norwegian so we can meld into your society as well."
Sylvia cried as we made love. It was soft and tender and very sensual.
0o0
Our early dinner involved the quarter pound prawns we had brought from DC and Izzy's farm. Chef had managed to butterfly and dip the shrimp in an egg wash after seasoning them with Old Bay before coating the shellfish in panko and quickly frying them. After beheading the shrimp, they weighed about 1/8th a pound each and we had 100 pounds of shrimp tails; enough for everyone to enjoy their fill and then some.
The shrimp were served with a plethora of sauces which included sweet and sour sauce, tartar sauce, a cocktail sauce, clarified butter, Buffalo Blue Cheese Sauce, Orange chili dipping sauce, Chinese hot mustard sauce, and a home-made, Tabasco like fermented red-hot sauce with a good kick of heat. I had two shrimp with each sauce. I think my favorite was split between the Buffalo Blue Cheese and Orange chili sauces.
The shrimp was accompanied by an oriental Mandarin Orange Cauliflower salad consisting of
Cauliflower florets, green onions toasted sesame seeds, toasted almonds, and fresh mandarin orange slices tossed with a simple dressing of sugar, salt, pepper, vinegar, thickened mandarin orange juice, and salad oil.
We had a delightful vegetable medley made with cubed zucchini and fresh wood ear mushrooms, garlic, onion, and ginger sauteed in butter and olive oil before adding some oyster sauce, steamed fresh bamboo shoots, soy sauce, and pepper to pull all the flavors together.
To drink we had hot Pu-erh tea. Its rich, earthy flavor, helped to break down the heaviness of the vegetables while cutting through the oil of the fried shrimp without overpowering the meal.
All too soon it was time to say our goodbyes and Batgirl, Ladyhawk, and Heavylift flew Sylvia to her Palace and Bill to Air Force One as we pulled away from Oslo. The choppers meeting back up with us as we were underway.
When the crews returned, we had an extended family meeting, called by DD, to discuss our feelings about leaving loved ones behind. DD began, "Well, I am very sad at the moment. I called this meeting because I am sure everyone, including Cheech and Chong, are feeling a sense of loss as well.
Sue and Xi began to pout but Cheech and Chong just deeply sighed. Cheech looked at Barbara and Izzy and asked, "How did you let your sons leave home? Leaving our kids is heartbreaking!"
Barbara smiled in the most compassionate way she knew how, "I cried for almost a whole week. Eventually, my dear husband helped me to focus on him and things slowly began to heal."
