Let me start with the fact that I believed I would never be this guy, while I held no strong views on incest and morality in general, I knew why others found it so off-putting. The thought of someone having a child just to groom them for their own use strikes me as unnatural and arrogant. Now that is not to say that is what I did, in fact up until that trip I only thought of my little girl as the smartest, cutest, most trustworthy young person I had ever known, and I couldn't be prouder of her.
When we first had Amber, Mary and I were married for 3 years and had gone from the passion of dating for 2 years, threw the honeymoon period of a new couple and were settling into what I assumed was a normal slow life of a typical family. We had gone from having sex 3 times a day to maybe 1 or 2 a week and when Amber was born, we were lucky to have enough energy to do it a couple times a month. As she grew, she became a total daddy's girl, she knew I was weak when it came to anything she asked. As an Engineer I was making a good living and the family really wanted for nothing, we took trips, bought toys, anything that Amber asked for I would get her. This caused some trouble when she was around 6 years old, she started, as most little girls do, with talk about marring me.
She would say stuff like," Daddy, When I grow up, I'm going to marry you and make you food all day." I just took it as a little girl not knowing how to say she loves her dad and just smiled along.
This always made her happy and she would make me promise before she hopped along to play some game or brush one of her dolls.
"Paul, you are such a softie, Amber's going to grow up all spoiled if you keep this up." Mary would comment.
I would just respond with a casual "I can't help it, she's my little girl." and laugh it off like it didn't matter.
When she was 12 and had her first period it was me who had to run her to the store and pick out the correct product for her needs, and after take her to get ice cream and talk about what she should expect. Now to be honest I had always been open with my daughter about anything she wanted to know so it was easy for us to talk and share, I never hide anything from her, and explained things in a way she could understand.
However, I admit that I spoiled her more than normal because for her 16th birthday she had asked me and my wife for a vibrator. I made a whole big stink about how she didn't need it and Mary was dead set against her having one before she was 18.
"But, Mom, my friends all have one and I need one." she complained.
"What could you need one for? You don't even know what they are for." Mary would snap back.
"Of course, I know what they are for I looked it up, and I need one so that I can wear down my hymen before eventually having sex, or do you want my first time to hurt like hell?"
That caught my wife off guard and she staired back with her mouth ajar, I had to hand it to Amber she did her research when she knew there, her mom might not agree.
"Are you going to say anything Paul?"
"Well, I don't know, she is getting to that age, but your right there isn't any reason for her to have one just yet." I said with a stern face that said I was thinking about it but wasn't going to budge.
"But Daddy...."
"No buts, you don't need it and that's final." Mary said cutting Amber off.
She stormed away after that, pouting at not getting her way, but later that week after things had calmed down, I picked Amber up from school and drove downtown.
"So, how was school?" I asked making small talk.
"Fine, the girls and I hung out in the library and talked about getting ready for prom and what college we want to go to." she said pulling off her sweater.
She always wore a big sweated all day at school for some reason but undressed as soon as she got home, I couldn't understand as she wore tight shirts and skirts or jeans underneath, so it wasn't like she had a problem with her confidence as far as I could see. She was growing into a gorgeous woman by now with 34 DD's a 24" waist and full 35" hips that really made her stand out against girls her age and even women older than her.
I got off the freeway and Amber sat up noticing it wasn't the normal way home. "Daddy where are we going?"
"I was going to pick something up really quickly." I said trying to sound calm.
"Oh, ok." was all I got before she went back to her phone.
"Honey, you know that thing you asked for your birthday?" I probed.
"Ugh, Ya, I can't believe mom doesn't want me to have one." she pouted.
"Well, what did you mean about using to wear down your hymen?"
"I did my research about it and using a dildo or vibrator on a regular basis can help teen girls loosen up before they are ready for their first time, but it takes a couple years and I don't want to wait until I'm 20 before having sex, so I thought I would get ready now and when I turn 18 and become and adult, I can be ready just in case."
Amber had this way of saying things, that would embarrass other teens, as simple facts that everyone should know. It should have something to do with her great grades in school and the fact that she never got in trouble like other teen, but it was one of the things that made me treat her like the smart girl she was.
"Are you sure you need it? You could always use a different method if you really need to." I asked trying to see just how sure she was.
"I could but this seems like the most for sure way. Besides Daddy, using my hands isn't like the real thing, and you know I like to be ready before trying something new."
I almost slammed the brakes from her blunt remarks, but managed to stay calm and just pulled into a parking lot next to a unmarked building.
"Alright sweetheart, then if you are sure you need it come with me." I said getting out of the car and heading for the building.
Amber squealed and almost burst out of her seat, she walked behind me as we entered the store. Once inside I walked up to the counter and took out my wallet, Amber was in aww at all the toys and products in the store.
"Go ahead dear, pick whatever you want and I'll get it for you, but you can't tell mom I got it. If she finds out you say it was a friend from school who had extra, ok?"
"You're the best Daddy, ok I'll go look." she said and the sped off into the store.