Son Worshipper

What started as another night of loneliness and frustration, ended up as a whole new life for me. For nearly 30 years, I have lived with a man that is a self-centered, egotistical asshole. I realized shortly after we were married that he had planned a future for me, not as an equal partner, but as a servant to his every want and need. I was so young and naïve and I did not realize the destructive dynamics of this relationship until it was much too late. To keep control over me, my husband would play mind games that made me feel totally worthless as a person and as a woman. I was made to feel undesirable. I was so ashamed of myself that I hung my head in public and I did everything in my power to keep people from noticing me, the real me. I have large breasts and that makes me even more self-conscious because the way people react to them. Often, that is all that people noticed about me. Many times people will not even look me in the face because their eyes are glued to my chest. Because of my insecurities, I portray myself as obtuse, even though I am quite the opposite. This depiction caused people to not take me seriously. This was another way to draw the attention away from me.

One of my “husband’s” mind games for the longest time was to make me think he didn’t want sex with me because I was lacking the skills in that area. I later learned that my “husband” was not interested in a mutually gratifying sexual relationship at all. Our sex life was nearly non-existent. Sex could never be initiated by me. It was only when and how he wanted it. It was so unfulfilling; I would just as soon not do it!. His idea of lovemaking was to call me over to his side of the bed, have me mount his cock and fuck him until he shot his miserable wad (that was all of about 30 seconds). After that it was thank you, good night and then he would roll over and fall asleep. He would leave me laying there frustrated and heart broken. His other sad attempt at sex would be to use my oral talents. He would want nothing to do with any part of my body, except my mouth. Then it was the quickie blow job. That was so disgusting, so one sided, that I could not even leave his cock in my mouth when he finally had an orgasm. Although he would beg me, I would never swallow his sperm.

My “husband” (a term I use very lightly), travels quite frequently. His job takes him all over the country and I am left alone for nights, even weeks at a time. I am usually left at home to handle all the responsibilities and daily chores. I never minded though because of the “other” man in my life, my son James. James is the joy and love of my life. I never thought I would have any children with the limited sex life my husband provided. I was in total shock when I found that I was pregnant. At the age of 30, I gave birth to my beautiful baby boy. James and I were close from the very beginning. I did everything in my power to give him the perfect life. I had no marriage, so all of my attention was given to my baby boy. My “husband” had very little to do with our son so as James grew older, he and I grew closer. I was involved in all his activities and I made sure he was always happy and never lonely. When the day came for him to go off to college I was devastated! With James away from home, I had lost all hope of ever feeling alive again. With my boy gone, my “little man” away at school, my life seemed totally empty.

After my son left, I was alone most of the time and I had time to think, or in my case dwell, on the emptiness and loneliness of my life. A great deal of my loneliness was sexual. I had known from an early age that I was a very sexual being. I loved it and I needed it! Through self gratification I had discovered that I was able to have multiple orgasms and in my darkest moments of being alone, I would use my imagination and my “toys” to make myself cum. Usually that was enough, but at other times I would crave the touch, the warmth, and the passion that two bodies created when pressed against each other. I wanted to feel loved and to feel special, so I allowed myself to be drawn to the thrills of an alternative relationship. This alternative relationship was with my friend Jeannie, who was also in a loveless and sexless marriage. The more we compared our sorry lives, the closer we became. We found we could talk about anything and everything. We could call on each other for comfort and support any time of the day or night. Out of that closeness we began a sexual relationship that we used to fill the voids in our lives.

It started one day when Jeannie showed up at my work place. I could see she had been crying and was on the verge of another break down. She needed a true friend, now more than ever. I asked her to come into my office and shut the door so we would talk privately. I took Jeannie’s hand and walked her to my over-stuffed leather sofa and motioned for her to sit down. I started to ask her why she was so upset when she broke down, sobbing uncontrollably. I reached over to give her a friendly hug, as was our habit. She told me of the financial problems her husband had created and how he was leaving her for a younger woman, a woman he had been seeing most of their marriage! As we sat there holding each other, something started to happen inside of me. It must have been the feeling of another needing me or the warmth of another person in my arms. That special feeling, combined with the loneliness, neglect and abuse I had endured, caused a stirring way down inside of me. I gently took Jeannie’s head in my hands, pulled her close and began kissing her ever so softly, not knowing or caring if those kisses would be rejected. I don’t know how to explain what happened next, but we began kissing each other deeply and passionately. Our tongues were wildly searching each other’s mouths, like starving dogs going after the last piece of meat. We couldn’t help but feel the other’s body quiver with each kiss. It was as if we were the only two people on the planet. We didn’t care where we were or if we might get caught, we just knew we needed each other and we were going to take all the pleasure we could!

We started going at each other’s clothes, ripping them from each of our bodies and scattering them everywhere! Before we knew it we were completely naked, sitting and staring at each other’s bodies. I told Jeannie that I would make her forget the sadness, the loneliness, even if for only a short time. I wanted and yearned for the same feeling from her. I then took Jeannie by the shoulders and gently pushed her back until she was flat on the sofa, her head resting up on the arm. I got on my knees, crawling between Jeannie’s outstretched legs, causing her to spread them wide and expose her moist, shaved pussy. It was so aromatic and in the perfect position to be devoured. Before I tasted my friend’s pussy I wanted to explore her beautiful body beginning with her breasts. I took them in my hands and started massaging them, causing her nipples to become hard and pointing out in my direction. They were begging for my attention! I leaned down and began to suck first one, then the other. At times I would take a nipple between my teeth and bite down hard enough to make her moan with pleasure, a pleasure that bordered on pain. When I had a nipple between my teeth I would use my tongue to tickle and excite it even more. I could tell Jeannie was enjoying this as much as I.

After I had feasted on those tanned, firm breasts, I began exploring the rest of her body with my mouth and tongue. Every now and then I would stop and linger on certain parts of her body licking, kissing, biting; I wanted to devour all of her. After what seemed an eternity I had reached my destination, Jeannie’s luscious, dripping pussy! I could not control myself. I went straight for her clitoris, treating it as I did her nipples. I used my tongue, teeth and mouth to pleasure her. I could feel Jeannie’s body stiffen and felt her arch her back, she was ready to cum. I wasn’t ready for that yet! I had her where I wanted her – on the verge of an orgasm. I started licking and sucking every inch of her womanhood, inserting my tongue as far as I could. I was lapping up her sweet pussy juice, enjoying her every moan, groan and expression of pleasure! When I was through devouring her beautiful pussy, I decided it was time to let Jeannie experience her long awaited orgasm. I took her clit in my mouth and began licking and sucking until I felt the ultimate jerk of her body and then the limpness that follows. Her only other movements were the small aftershocks that traveled through her satisfied body and the surge of her hips that forced her pussy into my face begging for me to lap every ounce of her cum as it drained out of her. After that orgasm, Jeannie and I lay there, two naked bodies on a sweat covered leather sofa. The aroma of our body fluids mixed with the scent of leather was enough to have our passions for each other reignite. This time, we decided to please each other in the sixty-nine position. The excitement of being in that position and the thought of being caught caused us to have orgasm after orgasm. Our lovemaking continued that day until quitting time. As we dressed, we vowed to quit being victims and to satisfy each other’s needs, any time and in whatever way was necessary. Since that initial encounter, we have visited each other often, finding and giving pleasure to our long-deprived bodies. The relationship with Jeannie filled a much needed desire to be with someone intimately. The feel and touch of another woman was comforting and very exciting, but there always seemed to be something more that I wanted. Little did I know my needs would soon be fulfilled by someone so unexpected?

This began one evening as I was sitting on my patio deck, as I did many evenings when I was alone. I would come home, take a shower, dress in my big terrycloth robe, eat a small dinner, fix a pot of coffee and go out and sit surrounded by the awesome beauty of nature, and fantasize. It was on evenings like these, when I would realize what more I had wanted. I would feel the longing to be with a man, a man who was as concerned about pleasing his partner as well as himself. I thought about how it would feel to take a cock in my mouth and let him fuck me there until his sweet man juices would shoot down my throat. I longed to feel his fullness in my cunt as his hardened cock entered me and I would feel every thrust of his manhood. It is sad to say, but I have only fantasized about these feelings, because no man has ever had the stamina or consideration to bring me to an orgasm. How I wanted to experience that, wondering if it could even be achieved. These, and other equally hot fantasies, would be cause for me to begin my lonely self gratification. I would reach for my bottle of sun tan oil, disrobe and rub the slick sunscreen over my body, slowing as I massaged my breasts, pinching my nipples until they were hard as rocks and I could barely stand the pain. Then I would take one hand and move it down over my stomach until I reached my clean shaven pussy. I would play with my clit until it became so swollen you would have thought I had my own little cock. I would massage my “little cock” with my thumb as I inserted other fingers up inside of me. At times, I would rub back and forth between the slit of my pussy, from the clit to my asshole, sometimes inserting a well greased finger into my ass. I would sit doing all of this until I would reach a mind shattering, self-induced orgasm. That is what I did that night, the night that changed my life forever. I was still shivering from my self-induced orgasm. I did not know there was anyone else in the house. I suddenly heard a noise behind me and as I turned I was looking deep into the eyes of my dearest love. Standing in the doorway looking out on the deck was my handsome son, James. For a child of 19, he looked so mature, so handsome. I was in awe of him. Could someone so beautiful really have come from within me? I guess I should have been embarrassed or apprehensive, but for some reason I wasn’t. I could see a pleased look on his face and as I looked down his body I could see the huge bulge in his pants, a bulge that had been created by watching me. I reached out, gesturing him towards me. Once in front of me, I was eye level with his bulging crotch. Without saying a word, I reached over, opened his pants and slowly pulled them down, lowering them to his ankles. In front of me was my son, my only child and he had an erection bigger than any I had ever seen! With no words between us, I put my hands on the cheeks of his ass and pulled him so that I could take his cock in my mouth. As I did this I heard him moan and say, “Oh, Mommy that feels so good.” God did that excite me! To hear him call me Mommy as we embarked on such an incestuous journey. I was so excited and wanted all that I could get. I used my hands to make him thrust in and out of my mouth, wanting to experience something I had only fantasized about. As he thrust harder and harder, I could taste the sweetness of my son’s pre-cum. Then it happened! My son grabbed the sides of my head, snorted like a bull and shot a load of the sweetest cum I had ever tasted! His man juice far exceeded my expectations. I was working desperately to swallow all of his cum, but there was so much it was spilling out the sides of my mouth. The orgasm brought James to his knees, a position that put him at eye level with me. He looked in my eyes, he saw his cum all around my mouth and to my surprise, he leaned forward and began licking it off my face! He was lapping his own secretions up. As he licked, his tongue found my mouth and we fell into a kiss so deep, so passionate that we were both becoming aroused! I could feel his cock swelling back to that hardness that had just filled my mouth.

James rose to his feet, took my head in his hands and tilted it back until we were facing each other. He told me how he had longed to satisfy his mother in any way she wanted. He said he always felt a special bond with me and knew from a very early age that he not only loved his mother, but was in love with her as well. He said that as he grew older, he realized how his father treated me and he could understand and feel my loneliness. He also told me that he had discovered my relationship with Jeannie and how he would hide and watch as we pleasured each other. He stated that when he was younger he didn’t understand all that he saw but he knew that whatever Jeannie was doing to me with her mouth, brought me great joy. He said he always dreamed of making his Mommy just as happy. With my head still in his hands he said, “Let’s go to your room.” “I want to take care of my Mommy as no one ever has.” As we walked upstairs, the doubts filled me. Was I wrong for wanting my son sexually? If I was, then why was it feeling so good? It was as if he knew what I needed and what I liked. I guess it was natural since he had always been a special part of me. Whatever it was, I knew I wanted more and I was on my way to get it and I did not care if it was wrong.

As we headed to my bedroom, all I could think about was how I again wanted my son’s huge hard cock in my mouth and how I wanted to be swallowing his sweet cum. I had loved that more than I could ever imagine. Upon reaching the bedroom, James sat me down on the bed and laid me back spreading my legs. I was anticipating that beautiful cock entering my pussy. I could not believe the next words that came from my mouth! I told James that his Mommy wanted her little boy to fuck her and fuck her hard, but he had other ideas! He said we would gladly fuck his Mommy, but that would come later. First he said he wanted to experience the pleasure of eating my pussy, just as Jeannie had done on so many occasions. As his face neared I could feel his breath hitting my very wet pussy causing even more excitement and anticipation. The thought of my son, with his face deep in my pussy, almost made me orgasm. I decided I was going to hold out as long as possible and enjoy the pleasure he was about to bestow on me. He started by encircling my swollen clit with his mouth, then he spread the lips of my pussy moving his tongue to the opening that would soon accept his hardened cock. He pushed his face in so hard, trying to insert his tongue in me as far as possible, going in and out licking, sucking and biting for all he was worth. Then he began to move towards the back and would lick my asshole and then work slowly back to my clit. He was an expert at oral sex! I couldn’t hold out any longer! I had been deprived of sex and lovemaking for so long that I exploded in an orgasm, one better than any I had ever had in my life. I had never felt my body shiver and quiver like it did with that orgasm.

As thrilling as that orgasm had been, I wanted more and I wanted it now. James was not through either. He told me he loved the taste of my pussy and he wanted more. He climbed up in the bed with straddled my face, turning towards my feet. He bent down from that position and started eating my pussy again. That is when I took his beautiful cock in my mouth and we formed the sixty-nine position. I could tell from his moans and groans that he was enjoying every bit of it. I then did something I had never done to anyone until now! I took one of my fingers, put it in my mouth to lubricate it and I inserted it in his asshole. He jerked at first, but I held him there until he started to enjoy it. There I was, I had my son’s cock in my mouth, my finger in his ass and he was eating Mamma’s pussy. It seemed so nasty, so dirty, and so filthy that it was too much for me! I had another great orgasm at the same exact moment that my little boy shot his sweet cum in my mouth. This time I did not waste a bit. I swallowed every ounce.

I was in heaven! I was experiencing sexual feelings and sensations I had never known before and it was with someone I truly loved, although it was considered forbidden as far as society was concerned. Yes it was with my own son, my own flesh and blood, but I just couldn’t get enough of him. I found myself begging my son to “please fuck Mommy in her pussy. I want my little boy’s cock inside of me.” Finally, he said it was time. I laid back and I let James come down on me. I spread my legs apart showing him I was ready. As his cock got close to my pussy, I was beginning to feel a new level of arousal. As he began to enter me, I was not sure if I could handle his massive size, but finally I felt his balls lay against my ass. I knew my cunt was fuller than it had ever been before! He was touching places inside of me that no one had ever touched before. When he touched me so deep inside, my body started pumping, bucking against him and I found myself fucking him harder than he was fucking me. I could hardly believe it; here was my son, back to the very space from which he entered the world! We were fucking each other so hard that when we exploded, our screams of pleasure could have been heard throughout the house. After that orgasm we laid together, my son’s exhausted body on top of me. That did not last very long though. I could feel his cock becoming hard again. He held on to me and rolled us over until we had switched positions. He on his back and I on top of my new lover. I immediately slid down his cock and pumped my hips until we both came again. Exhausted again from pleasures like neither of us had ever felt before, we laid there quietly trying to regain the strength that had been drained from our bodies. Once rested, I took my baby’s hand and led him to the bathroom. I told him we would take a shower before going back to bed. To my surprise, my son was not yet finished with me. He asked if I had ever had a golden shower. I told him no, but for him I would try anything. He positioned me, sitting me down in the tub. He stood over me, taking his lovely cock in his hand, spraying me with his warm, sweet fluid! He poured his golden nectar over my body. I leaned my head back, opening my mouth and letting him even piss there. That excited him so much I could see him growing hard again. He pulled me up, kissed me deeply and said what a great mother/lover I was. I told him that what is fair for the goose is fair for the gander. I had him lay down in the tub, I stood over him and let loose with my own golden stream trying to cover him in the warmth as he had just done to me. I was new to this form of sex play, but I did manage to hit his mouth, that was what he was begging me to do. After that, we caressed each other and then finished showering. We got out, lovingly toweled each other and went back to bed, holding each other’s naked bodies until we fell asleep. The next morning, I lay there watching my son sleep, thinking what a wonderful lover he was. He was the best I had ever known. I could not let him go! I needed him for the rest of my life. Later when he awoke, I found he felt the same way. He told me he had never experienced lovemaking and sex as wonderful as he had with me, his own mother! James told me he wanted me all to himself and wanted no other man to touch me unless he gave his permission. He said we would be lovers for the rest of our lives. Since then, we have been together as often as possible. We have satisfied each other completely.