My son finished unpacking all of things and laid down on his bed trying to hold back his tears.
I sat down beside him wrapping my arms around setting his head on my lap and rubbed his hair like I always did when he was younger. Him and his girlfriend recently broke up and he was not taking it well at all.
"It's going to get easier I promise hun, I know it doesn't seem that way but as time goes on you will realize it."
"You know what we should do to get your mind off this?"
He shook his head looking up at me waiting for me to answer.
"How about we both get freshened up and go up the pub to grab a couple drinks and let loose for the night?"
"I don't know mom, I don't think I'll be the best company and wouldn't want to bring you down with me."
"Oh stop it, after a couple drinks you'll loosen up.. you'll be better than sitting in here all night thinking about her."
I pulled him out of bed and we stood facing each other as my hands were rest on his cheeks.
"Your mom always knows what's best for you."
I sat in the living room and pulled a cigarette out as I heard him coming down stairs, I waited until he could see me before lighting up.
"Im gonna smoking this cigarette then we'll head out, sound good?"
He nodded his head and grabbed a beer than sat across from me on the other couch on his phone but picking up his head to watch me every time I moved the cigarette toward my mouth to take a drag.
"Well it's good to see your not totally out of it, I'm surprised that hasn't faded away since you left home.. she wasn't a smoker was she?"
"Not usually, she tried it couple times but it didn't do anything for me."
I chuckled to myself taking another drag then blowing a couple smoke rings then inhaling the rest and slowly poured the smoke out of my mouth.
"I could of told you that babe, i know what you like."
"As much as I wanted it and enjoyed it I wish we just ended that night like we normally did."
I dragged on my cigarette as I stood up and went and sat next to him.
"It wasn't right for me asking you to come lay with me in bed but i had no intentions on going any further than smoking a couple cigarettes for you before you went to bed, kind of last hoorah before you moved out."
I took another pull on my cigarette this time snap inhaling followed by another hard drag still holding in the smoke from the first drag then finally exhaled slowly in his direction.
"If you enjoyed it so much why do you regret it?"
He took a deep breath.
"I don't know, it's hard to explain."