I had been looking forward to this day for weeks. Why? Because I'm a huge Seattle Seahawks fan and they were playing the Denver Broncos in the Superbowl. We were all gathered at my brother's large farm house- men of all ages and all of us related in some way. By design, this had turned into an almost exclusive men's party. All of the women in our lives were together at my home few hours away, with my wife, at El Matador State Beach in Malibu, California. A few of the women were into football, but most of them were looking forward to some beach time at one of the most beautiful beaches in California. Fun for them, fun for us. We were excited beyond belief, laughing, eating, drinking, and riveted to the pregame show. It's safe to say football was the only thing on our minds.
The only woman left in this house was my brother Tom's wife, Cindy. She was supposed to be in Malibu with the girls but three days earlier had what can only be described as a pretty serious glute injury. I know what you're thinking - butt hurt. However, her butt wasn't the real problem. When you have a glute injury it causes a lot of added stress to the hamstrings and lower back extensors. Once these other muscles start to spasm, the pain can be debilitating. (Okay, I admit I'm a physical therapist, but the last 10 years I've been managing a pain clinic and haven't had any hands-on patient care experience in over a decade.)
Cindy had refused the hardcore pain killers, muscle relaxants, and anti-inflammatories that would have let her limp along with the other girls. As a result, she was on bed rest and kind of isolated in her upstairs master bedroom.
I think it's tacky when guys spend a lot of time describing a women's body, especially if it's a close relative, but suffice to say she's beautiful, 10 years younger than me in her 30's, athletic, long dark brown hair, boobs that have been upgraded, and tight. My stupid brother had married well.
The first play of the game Denver's center snapped the ball over Peyton Manning's head resulting in a safety. Things just got better and better as the Seahawks jumped ahead to a 22-0 lead in the first quarter. The drinking increased dramatically, the noise level had raised, the party was full on now. I was way at the back of the room by myself. I had a view of the back of everyone's head, but could still see the game perfectly on the big screen. Perfect for me.
When Cindy hobbled into the room, I had forgotten she was home. She looked disheveled, barefoot, and was dressed super casual in a pair of PE shorts, a loose-fitting top that didn't quite reach her belly button, and no bra. For whatever reason it was like she was the invisible woman. None of the other guys noticed her. But she must have noticed my head snap around and she caught me doing the long appraisal. As my eyes lifted from her thinly covered nipples to her eyes, we made eye contact and both smiled. Busted. Oh well, I think she appreciated one man noticed her entrance. Suddenly, for me, the game became less interesting. I felt a familiar movement, a jump really, in my groin. Messy Cindy was definitely hot Cindy.
She went up front to my brother Tom and after several attempts finally got his attention. They had a short, heated exchange that I couldn't hear because of the TV and the drunk crowd. I was watching her intently when my brother suddenly turned, pointed at me, said something short and returned his attention to the game. Cindy looked at me a little embarrassed and slowly made her way through the crowd back to my location. When she got to my isolated spot, I reached out and touched her hand. A human gesture. I wanted her to know I genuinely cared about her.
She said, "I'm super uncomfortable."
"I bet you are. That's a tough injury. What have you tried so far? Are you okay?"
That last question opened a flood gate of tears, explanations, and diagnoses that I listened to patiently. Apparently when she told my brother how much pain she is in, he told her to talk to me because of my position at the pain clinic. Truth is I'm a paper pusher, but he doesn't know anything about what I really do. Cindy explained that she had been alternating hot and cold compresses, resting, and taking some over the counter pain relievers. But the pain was getting almost unbearable. The pain had migrated to her hamstrings (back of the upper leg) and her lower back. This is actually typical for this type of injury.
"What you really need is a deep tissue massage. A skilled massage therapist can release the Piriformis Medius muscle, work those hamstrings, and dig into your lower back. It's pretty painful but provides some lasting relief, sometimes for hours or even days. The problem is it's Sunday, and the real problem is it's Superbowl Sunday. You aren't going to find anyone until tomorrow."