Tim looked like the epitome of masculinity to me just then - standing there, so handsome, so virile, totally pumped from working out. I felt my nipples grow hard and my pussy tingle. The scared look on his face only excited me more. He wasn't afraid to show his emotions in front of me and I loved that about him more than his muscles.
I guided him over to the weight bench and had him sit down. I cradled his head to my chest, stroking his hair and rubbing his broad, chiseled and sweaty back. I fought back the physical desire trying to take me over and concentrated on the emotional strength I received from him, happy that I could channel some back to him for a time.
His strong arms circled my waist and held me close. "I can't give you up, Sara. I don't care what Mom or anyone else might think. You are all that is important to me. I want you, I love you, I need you."
He was so straightforward, so matter of fact there was no escaping these were feelings from deep in his core.
I kissed the top of his head and held on tightly. "I love you, Tim," I comforted him.
Normally, his words and being this close would turn us both on and lead to passionate, amazing sex. I noticed that Tim wasn't even semi hard in his shorts. He wasn't thinking of me sexually and our physical closeness wasn't driving urges through his body. This was passion of a different sort. This was deep seated, true caring for another person.
"Mom's staying here tonight and heading back to the lake in the morning. Let's just play it cool tonight, OK?" I suggested.
He looked up at me and there was pain in his eyes. "One night I think I can do, but I'm not giving you up, I can't give you up, Sara. I need you too much."
***
It was weird sleeping alone in my own bed knowing Tim was only feet away in his room, alone as well. I tossed and turned, an extra pillow no substitute of having my man, my brother next to me, in my arms while I slept. I woke early in the morning and couldn't get back to sleep so I went down to the kitchen.
Mom was already up and dressed. She was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee. She looked up at me and smiled as I walked in. I just sat across from her, nervously waiting as I looked at her. She took a sip of coffee.
"You really do love each other, don't you?" she began softly, looking down at her mug. "I saw you together again, in the workout room. I thought a run on the treadmill might help me clear my head. I saw you two in there and I watched as you held and comforted each other. I heard what you said to each other. I heard the pain and love in Tim's voice."
I reached across the table and lay my hand on hers. "We do, Mom. It's just fantastic how connected we are. It's not infatuation, it's not just physical, we're two halves of one whole," I tried to explain.
"I see it. I can feel it. I wish it weren't so, for both your sakes. But, while I don't understand it and I haven't quite come to grips with it, I can acknowledge how real it is. I love you both and a relationship with someone that you love, and who truly loves you, is a future that every parent hopes for their children. Unbelievably, from that standpoint I'm happy for both of you. But I ..." she trailed off, unable to reconcile the reality with the taboo.
"You and Dad raised both Tim and me to be mature, level headed people. I know you feel that Tim is mature for his age and very responsible. I hope you feel the same about me. You also taught me to be a strong, independent woman, to think for myself and to make my own choices. Well, I choose Tim."
"You're right about all of those things, honey. Both your father and I are proud of you and your brother. We trust both of you to do the right thing and make good choices. You have both grown to be good, well grounded, caring people," she agreed.
Nervously I broached a question I had thought a lot about during the night. "What will you tell Dad?"
"Nothing, for now. I've never kept secrets from your father, we've always been honest and truthful with each other. We've shared everything. I'm so torn, Sara. I can see how you two are, how you feel. Truthfully, it's beautiful. But then I think about how what you are doing is viewed as wrong by the world at large. As your mother I fear what it could mean for the two of you." She squeezed my hand. Her head jerked up. I turned and saw Tim walk into the room.
He walked over and kissed her on the head. Then he turned and did the same to me. "Hi Mom," he said tentatively.
"Hello, sweetie," she replied, a tear forming in the corner of her eye.
"Mom," Tim stated, "I can't imagine what this is like for you, especially finding out the way you did. I know you've had less than 24 hours to deal with this. I just want you to know, I truly, deeply love Sara. I have no concept of my life without her. I can't describe the ache in me, the sense of missing, all night last night not having her next to me."
He continued, "We've grown up together. I've always loved her as my sister but somewhere along the line she transformed into this amazing woman who was so much more than my sister. Obviously, she's physically beautiful and that, honestly, scared me and made me question whether all I felt for her was some form of sick lust, but it isn't. She is so much more than her body to me. She does things to me that no other woman does. She makes me want to be the best person I can be, for her."
Mom stood up and held out her arms to Tim. He moved to her and she embraced him. "I see all of that, Tim. I understand all of it, too. I just need to reconcile you two with the realities of the world. Give me a little time to work this through."
They released each other. Looking into Mom's eyes, Tim was succinct, "Of course, Mom."
Mom said good bye and told us "Just stay here in the kitchen until I'm gone." With that she was out the door and we heard her car pull away down the street.
Tim pulled me from the chair and crushed his lips to mine. "I missed you so much last night. It's still early and you've got time to get ready for camp so come to my bed for a little while," he pleaded.
"I will come to our bed with you," I informed him and then sprinted away, peeling off my tshirt and panties in the hallway as I ran to his room.
Tim was right behind me, dropping his shorts and tshirt to the floor.
I pointed to his bed and told him, "Get in and roll on your side facing that way."