As this is the second part in a series, it is recommended that you read Chapter 1 before reading this. As always, your comments and votes at the end are much appreciated.
Also, a special note of thanks to my editor, MsRoseEvans, for painstakingly going through my work.
"Kyle, please open the door. I need to talk to you."
Dana kept banging against the bathroom door, hoping, praying, that the damage was not as bad as she thought. Her brother had locked himself inside. The only sounds she could hear were those of occasional violent retching. The shock had hit him hard.
She kept imploring for several minutes, until finally she heard the vomiting stop. The silence that followed was uneasy. Finally the door swung open and her brother came out. He looked unlike she had ever seen him before.
His hair was tousled. His face was sunken and sallow, covered by a fine mixture of tears and remnants of vomit. He wiped it clumsily with his shirt sleeve. His eyes, those childish eyes, were red from crying and now just stared blankly into space. Kyle had become a different person over the last few minutes.
He didn't even look in her direction as he headed off towards his room. Dana purposefully moved so that she was blocked his way down the corridor. She was going to speak to him, no matter what.
"Go away," said Kyle, without even looking up at her.
"I just want to talk. Can you do that for me?"
Kyle looked up now, his face a mask of anger, hurt and resentment. He felt betrayed in the most intimate way possible. She had literally brutalized his soul. He would take some time getting over that.
He tried to push her out of the way. In one swift motion, she pinned him against the wall using both hands. He struggled for a while, before realizing he stood no chance of getting out. So, he just looked her directly in the eye.
"Are you going to rape me?" he asked.
Even as he said this, his eyes widened in horror. Give how much stronger she was, it was a possibility. But she would never? Would she? Keeping in mind the events of the last half an hour, he didn't seem to recognize her any more.
"No. I won't," said Dana trying to keep her tone as even as possible. "I just want to talk to you."
"Talk. Talk about what? How you tried to seduce your brother? How you tried taking advantage of his vulnerability? How you utterly abused his trust?"
She took a deep breath.
"I know you are feeling hurt and angry right now. I want you to cool down, and think this over carefully. What I did was wrong. It was a crime for which I hate myself more than you can possibly imagine. If I could take it back, I would. It was a desire I should have never entertained. I can't begin to describe how sorry I am, but I need you right now."
"Do you need me, or my mouth to stick your tongue down again?"
"I need you, all of you. You are all I have and I cannot see you drift away like this."
"Do you know what you are? You are a toxic influence. You have poisoned the strongest bond I had in the world and turned into a breeding ground for your sick, debauched desires. Just let me go now. I don't think I want to talk anymore."
She listlessly moved aside as her brother stormed into his room and slammed the door shut.
In a dull haze of guilt, she slowly made her way back to her room. Each step seemed heavy and labored as she somehow struggled into bed. A tempest of thoughts and bitter regrets swirled around inside her head. She loathed every single risquΓ© fantasy she had about him. She abhorred her rationalization of her depraved desires. Most of all, she could not get over the fact that she had hurt her little brother. Years earlier, they had made an unspoken pact that they would always be there for each other.
Looking around, she spotted a bottle of Ambien on the shelf. Sleeping pills. They seemed like her way out. She willed herself up and moved towards the bottle slowly. She picked up the bottle and surveyed its contents. There were about 10 pills left. That should be enough.
Taking a deep breath, she swallowed the entire bottle contents in one go. She retrieved the photo of her and Kyle at Lake Crawford and mentally apologized to it. She went on for about half an hour before feeling the first effect from the pills. The world seemed to sway a bit. She blinked. Now it seemed distinctly darker. She could finally feel parts of her body giving in to the urge to go down. She vaguely remembered knocking over the coffee table before the blackness enveloped her.
Slowly but steadily, the blackness lifted. She seemed puzzled as she surveyed her new surroundings.
"Is this hell?" she wondered silently. She half-expected to see a big, red guy with horns and a pitchfork, but this seemed different.
The place was brilliantly lit. There were small wisps of smoke in a few places. It had an ethereal feel to it. She couldn't see any discernible structures anywhere. She heard footsteps approaching. Curious to see who it was, she turned towards the noise. Her jaw dropped when she saw Kyle coming out of the mist. He was in his usual cheerful mood.
"Kyle, I..."
"Surprised to see me here? I told you once that I would always be there when you needed me. That was a promise I intend to keep."
Unable to control herself, she lunged at him and held on to him as tightly as she could. He gently put his arms around her and comforted her as she cried uncontrollably into his chest. She finally looked up at him and tried to apologize.
He just looked back with that caring, understanding look which she had grown to love, and told her that it was all going to be okay.
"How can you say that? I tried to seduce you."
"And then tried to kill yourself. How do you think I will feel when I see you sprawled on the floor? One indiscretion can't outweigh all those years you have been there by my side. Am I enraged? Obviously. But does that mean I want you dead? Never."
Dana just stood there trying to make sense of what was happening. Finally she formed the words in her mouth.
"So you forgive me?"
"You know me better than anyone. You know that, however angry and disconsolate I may feel, I will always forgive you. The bigger question is this: Can you forgive yourself?"
She pondered the meaning of this for sometime before Kyle spoke again.