I turned to look at the back of me in the mirror and smiled. I didn't look bad at all.
My long ebony coloured hair flowed down my back, skimming the top of my backside. My skin was pale, almost ethereal. No one else I knew had skin this shade...well, apart from my brother James. I twisted slightly and caught a glance of my ass. It was pert that's for sure. Tight and round, the perfect little mound.
I sighed. I knew I was pretty. That was a given. I was seriously lucky in the looks department. My body was lithe, I was slim but not skinny, with all the right curves. Hips you cut glass on. Breast's high on my chest, perfectly round.
But I was so sick of the guys in college. They treated me like a trophy. Any one of them trying to get to the prize. The prize of my virginity. Something I was not willing to give to any of them just yet.
I wasn't a prude, far from it. I just hadn't met the right kind of guy yet, not to mention I was seriously nervous of the actual act of losing my virginity, and what it entailed.
To put it in a nutshell, I was scared.
It was silly, I knew that. But how could I get rid of a fear of something if I didn't actually know what to expect or experience?
Every time anyone got close, well, not even close but within reaching distance, I froze and it all went downhill. Especially as soon as it was obvious I wasn't going to put out.
I was sick of college guys, fucking thinking they knew everything there was to know about the world of sex...then tormenting me mercilessly when I wouldn't drop to my knees.
I looked in the mirror again, glancing at my body, trying to find something to criticise. I was wearing a cute little black lace set I had brought and smuggled into the house, past my parents. They would go nuts if they saw it.
I thought it was cute. And for god's sake, I was 18...an adult. I could wear anything I wanted to really. But whilst I was living under my parents roof...well, I had to follow their rules.
I sighed again, and spun round in shock and horror when I heard someone clear their throat. Thinking it was my father I panicked and grabbed my dressing gown off the bed. I was about to get into so much trouble. I quickly tried to cover myself up, and flushed bright red when I saw who was standing in my doorway.
"James! What the hell are you playing at? Haven't you ever heard of knocking for fucks sake."
My Older brother chuckled, obviously amused at my discomfort.
"You left your door open Jasmine, I was walking past when I saw you checking yourself out in the mirror. You should be more careful." He smirked, still finding my predicament a bundle of laughs.
James took a step into my room, and I shrank away slightly, very aware I was almost naked.
"What are you even doing here anyway?" I asked him. He shrugged and didn't answer my question. I turned away from him and slipped the dressing gown on, tightening the belt. "You aren't supposed to be back from Uni for another week. I would've made sure my door was shut if I knew you were back."
James chuckled again, a deep sound that made me think of happy family times. Before he left me to deal with my parents alone. Before he went off to university and left me all on my own.
"Shut up and come and give me a hug Jas'." He held open his arms, and I smiled at him finally, calmer now I had some semblance of actual clothes on, and getting over the shock of seeing him. I practically flung myself into his wide spread arms, and he squeezed me tight.
"Missed you little Sis. Nothing is the same without you around bugging me. It is far too quiet without you."
I smiled into his chest and breathed in his familiar scent. God, it had been months since I had seen him for one reason or another, and I had missed him so much.
"Give me a minute to get some proper clothes on and I'll come have a cup of tea with you, and you can tell me all about Uni." I said, ushering him out of the room.
"Don't mind me Sis, I'm only here for the view." He laughed and winked at me, ducking as I threw a pillow across the room.
"Get out!" I cried. I could hear his laughter down the hallway as he retreated. I rolled my eyes and slammed my door shut. As quickly as I could, I threw my dressing gown on to my bed, and started getting dressed.
***
Unfortunately, I still had to attend college for the next week, before we broke up for Christmas, so barely got to spend any quality time with James. Much to my annoyance. When I left for college he was usually still asleep, and by the time I got back he was out with his friends and his girlfriend.
Not that he didn't make his presence known, it just wasn't in a way I was expecting.
For the last week, whilst I was trying to sleep, all I could hear was James and his girlfriend...at it. I was mortified. I don't think he realised his girlfriend was quite so loud, nor the fact his bed banged against my bedroom wall.
I was just glad our parents room was across the other side of the house, and very much doubted they could hear the carrying on.
When I had finally finished College for the holidays, I breathed a massive sigh of relief. I could finally spend some quality time with James, before he went back to University.
I walked in to an empty house, nothing new there really. But I was a bit disappointed.
There was, however, a note pinned to the notice board, with my name at the top.
I read and reread it, a huge number of happy emotions running through me. Mum and Dad would be out till late, James was due back soon, sans girlfriend, and the note came with the promise of a night watching movies and eating junk food.
I ran up to my room and threw my heavy bag down. Jumping in the shower, I heard my name yelled up the stairs. I hollered back, but wasn't sure if I'd been heard or not, and continued to wash my hair.
I climbed out of the shower and dried myself off quickly, throwing on my sort of new sexy underwear, and walked back to my room.
Before I reached my door, I could feel the heat of eyes on me. I spun round, embarrassment pouring from me in waves. I stood stock still, not knowing what to do or where to put myself. James was standing at the top of the stairs, a smouldering look in his eyes.
My brain couldn't interpret the look in his eyes at first, and it took me a few moments to figure out the state of play.
I flushed red.
"How long have you been standing there?" I stuttered out.
His eyes burned into my flesh. I could barely breathe. "Long enough. I'm surprised Dad let's you wear underwear like those. They are positively dangerous."
I blushed again. "What do you mean?" I looked down at myself and realised how exposed I actually was. He was right. This underwear was scandalous. "Dad doesn't know I brought them, Mum told me not to tell him. He treats me like a little girl." I pouted, momentarily forgetting I was practically naked in front of my older Brother.
"Hmm, I can see why Sis. They do frame your butt well though." James flashed me a smile, and I relaxed slightly. I wasn't in any danger, this wasn't like a boyfriend seeing me. And then his words penetrated my mind, and I tensed up again. "Can I be honest with you little Sis?"
I narrowed my eyes at his tone, but nodded. "Of course. We've never lied to one another before."
"Yeah, true. But this is different." James shifted from one foot to the other. Obviously nervous. "Your ass kinda looks hot in them." He admitted. My jaw dropped open.
"James! What the hell, you shouldn't be looking at me like that! That's...that is so wrong!"
James shook his head, almost as if he was shaking away fog. "Damn Jas', I'm so sorry. Oh my god, I can't believe I just said that to you. I'm sorry." He smiled sheepishly at me, and I allowed myself to smile slightly back. "Your boyfriend is very lucky,"
"Its okay, I forgive you. You meant no harm. Besides, I doubt Adam thinks he's lucky. I've not...well, he's not really, erm, seen anything like that. Not yet anyway. I've not put out."
I had the pleasure of seeing James floored, which rarely happened. "Oh my god, are you serious? Really? Wow! Why not? You totally should, I shouldn't say this but you are so sexy, you'd have no problems."
I shivered slightly, partially from the chill in the air, partially from the way this conversation was going. Hearing James call me sexy had sent tingles shooting all over my skin. I was horrified and turned on in equal measures.
"Do you really think I'm sexy? That...erm, oh god that makes my skin tingle! I've never put out with anyone James, I've just not met the right guy. Plus I'm so nervous as I don't know what I'm doing." I laughed anxiety shining through. "I need someone to teach me."
"Yes I really think so. Oh god, you've nothing to be nervous about Jas, nothing at all. You are smoking hot, you could have your pick of the guys. To be honest, that's why I stopped to check you out!" He. laughed, "You make my skin prickle too Jas..."
I balked at that. Surely not, this was wrong on so many levels. But why does it feel so right to have him stood there checking me out?
"I wish I wasn't nervous, but I can't help it. I wouldn't even know where to start, let alone continue."
He smiled kindly. "I think you just need to let go, and do it. I don't mean get it over and done with, because that would be a waste. But...Fuck Sis, you've got me all hot and bothered now!"
I blushed. And then a fleeting thought darted through my mind, and I flushed even further. James tilted his head, knowing me so well, knowing I had just had an idea. And usually when that happened I was about to suggest something that would get us into heaps of trouble with our parents. He cocked his head, inviting me to spill. I closed my eyes, dying of embarrassment. I couldn't suggest what I had just thought. It was so...wrong. So bad. If our parents ever found out I'd even suggested it I would never see the light of day again.
James raised an eyebrow as he watched my internal struggle, knowing I wouldn't be able to keep this from him. All he had to do was wait, and I would spill. And he was right. I couldn't keep my mouth shut.
"I've had a thought..." I stuttered.
"Go on..." He smirked.
"But it's so wrong James, like really really wrong. I don't know if I should tell you! What would I do if you disagree and go and grass on me to Mum and Dad? They'd never talk to me again. And I'd be mortified."
"Look, I promise I won't tell. Besides, I could probably get into my own world of trouble for watching you half naked."
"True." I sighed. There'd be no going back once the words left my mouth. "Before I tell you, can I ask you a question? Even though I already sort of know the answer?"
He nodded. "Of course you can Sis."
"You've...oh, god...you've fucked your girlfriend haven't you? I mean, I'm going to blush telling you this, but I've heard you...well, I think I have anyway."
A slow smile spread across his face "Shit. You heard?" His smile betrayed how worried his words sounded.
"Oh my god, this is so embarrassing, but yes! She's so loud! and your goddamn bed bangs against my wall, it's kinda hard not to hear." I rolled my eyes.
A slight pink tinge had flushed across his cheeks, and that was the only sign I could see that James was ever so slightly uncomfortable with the current conversation.
