Steve Sager felt his daughter Shannon's hand reaching for his as they walked towards Penn Station to catch their train back to Albany, and after he took the moist little paw in his hand he glanced over and saw the joy on his baby's face. The girl's hazel eyes were still moist and sparkling, and Shannon's usually awkward form seemed to be floating gracefully over the pavement, a far cry from her usual gait as they moved briskly into the terminal.
Safely on the train Steve let Shannon pick out where to sit and she chose a pair of seats near the back of the last car. After easing into the seats Steve let out a sigh and Shannon acted concerned.
"You tired Daddy?"
"Let's just say I'm happy to get off my feet," he admitted. "You however, seem full of energy."
"Can't help it. This is absolutely the best-est day of my life. I was almost hoping we would miss the train so we would have to stay overnight."
"Probably have to sleep in the park, or on a bench in Penn Station."
"That sounds like that would be cool," Shannon opined.
"That shows you haven't spent much time down here," Steve noted, and Shannon grinned that toothy smile of hers that always melted his heart.
"Woo woo," Shannon whispered as the train started to move.
"If you want I can ask the conductor if you can ride up with the engineer," her father suggested sarcastically but Shannon shook her head and cuddled into her father.
"I'm right where I want to be, with the man I love," Shannon declared as the ticket taker moved down the mostly empty car and punched their tickets. "And while I'm at it, I want to tell you how much I appreciate everything you do for me. Not just today but all the time. I know sometimes I resented you because you seemed to be giving me a hard time, but as I got older I realized that it's not easy being Mom and Dad to a brat like me."
"Ah yes, do you remember what you said to me that one time I didn't let you go to the mall? You told me..."
"You'll never let me forget that will you?" Shannon interrupted but her father continued.
"You snapped at me, If you want to be a mother and a father, why don't you go fuck yourself," Steve said and watched Shannon cover her face.
"Not my finest hour, and I've apologized for that plenty of times since," she reminded him. "I was surprised that you didn't kick my butt when I said that."
"Well, I didn't like you swearing, but it was so funny I just let it go."
"Anyway, even though I didn't say anything most of the time, I noticed how you always found time for me. Other fathers would be out playing golf or hanging out in a bar but you would always be there. Standing in the drizzle watching me play soccer, going to all my dopey band concerts and just being there when I needed you. Even letting me cry on your shoulder when Tommy Parsons stood me up at the dance. Stuff Mom would do if she was still here."
"Tommy Parsons was not worthy of you," he interjected with a smile but Shannon was on a roll.
"Other things too, like going out on dates. All these years since Mom died and I only remember you going out with one lady." Shannon said.
"There were a couple other dates..."
"That one lady was the only one I saw around the house. The lady from the real estate company?"
"Paula Currier."
"All I remember was she had big boobies," Shannon giggled. "I tried to be on my best behavior when she was around but I got the feeling she wasn't interested in inheriting a family just to be with you."
"Oh, I don't think it was that," he lied. "Just didn't work out. Hey, let's talk about today. I think we got to do everything you wanted, right birthday girl?"
"Absolutely Daddy!" Shannon gushed. "The train ride down with the sun shining and the leaves changing along the Hudson? Awesome, and then getting to see Phantom Of the Opera on Broadway? Those seats were so great - you liked the show, didn't you Daddy?"
"Sure I did, and I enjoyed seeing you enjoy it so much too," he noted.
"Then dinner," Shannon continued. "I actually cut my filet with my fork and it was delicious, but then the best part of the whole day was when you brought me into that lounge and I had my first drink - in a bar."
"A Shirley Temple. After all while you're a woman in every other way but still and all you only just turned 18. You have a few more years to wait for the real thing."
"Still counts, but then the guy at the piano started playing that Billy Joel song - 'Just the Way You Are' - and you brought me out on that little dance floor," Shannon started but then tears started trickling down her cheeks so she stopped for a minute.
"My dancing couldn't have been that bad," her father said but Shannon ignored him.
"It was incredible. It made me feel like a woman for the first time in my life, dancing with my favorite guy in the world. I felt like a queen and it was all I could do to keep from fainting," Shannon concluded, and her father put her arm around her shoulder and gave her squeeze.
What happened next? It had happened before a couple of months ago on the anniversary of her mother's passing when she impulsively kissed him and not in a way daughters kiss their fathers. That time Steve was shocked and broke the kiss off when it started to get serious. This time however, while he was shocked again, this time he did not push Shannon away, and in fact by the time the kiss ended he was returning some of the passion.
"Wow," Shannon mumbled. "Thank you for not shoving me away again. Do I kiss good?"
"Yes."
"Ha. Screw you Billy Wagner," she said with a nervous giggle as she recalled a neighbor boy's review of her kissing ability before she got serious. "I love you Daddy. You know that, right?"
"Of course, and you know I love you too."
"That's not what I mean. I've shopped around but you're it. The perfect man. Kind, considerate and loving, not to mention handsome. You know my friend Penelope? She has a crush on you. She thinks you look like Tom Hanks."
"Penelope is too kind, and possibly in need of glasses."
"Don't try to change the subject."
"I'm trying to get you to realize that I'm as flawed as anybody. Maybe more so," Steve said while being happy nobody was sitting nearby.
"I call BS on that. I still remember the time we went to Pizza Hut and we were almost home when you realized you forgot to leave the tip on the table for the waitress so you drove back to the place to give it to her."
"Fair is fair. Look Shannon," her father said as he wrestled over whether he should bring up a subject that had bothered him since it had happened. "I need to tell you something."
"You aren't going to send me to an orphanage are you?"
"What?"
"Since Mom died whenever you get that serious tone in your voice, I've always been afraid that you were going to send me to an orphanage so you could get on with your life," Shannon explained. "I think years ago that a kid at school told me that's what happened to a friend of his and it stuck with me."
"No honey," he said with a tight smile. "But I have weak moments that prove I'm far from perfect. Moments that I'm really ashamed of. A couple of months ago I had to go back to the office after dinner, and when I got back you were asleep. There was no light on in your bedroom but the door wasn't closed. I figured that was because it was a warm night and you had your window open so I just glanced in to see if you were still awake but you weren't."
"Go ahead, Daddy," Shannon said, squeezing his arm when he hesitated.
"There was no light on but you had the curtains wide open and there was a full moon that night so it was almost like the light was on," Steve managed to say. "You were on top of the sheets naked, so I took a couple steps inside to maybe throw a sheet over you but I just froze there. I don't know how long I stood there but suddenly you moved in your sleep. Your arms and legs were akimbo as you squirmed on your back so I could see all of you. All of a sudden I came out of the trance I was in and spun around and went to my room. I didn't do anything but still..."
"I know you didn't do anything Dad. I was awake all the time," Shannon confessed.
"Awake?"
"That wasn't the first night I had done that either but it was the first time you noticed, and when you came into the room I thought that I had finally done it. For the longest time I had been flirting with you, praying you would take the hint, and there you were looking at me," she confessed. "I mean, I know I'm nowhere near as hot as Mom was but still I had to show you that I wasn't a kid anymore. When you left my room and didn't come back - well, I was still sobbing when the sun came up."
"Honey..."
"Guess you didn't like what you saw," Shannon concluded. "Should have known that if I can't interest the horny guys my age I wouldn't stand a chance with a real man."
"You don't understand honey," he replied. "I'm your father."
 
                             
                         
                         
                         
                         
                         
                                 
                                 
                                 
                                